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To feel frustrated by my DH's 'man flu'

(13 Posts)
Lizzie48 Wed 06-Dec-17 12:34:02

Do you find that when men have a cold they act as if they're really ill and can't do anything?? Whenever my DH has a cold, if he's off work, he really thinks he can't do anything in the house at all.

Last time, I asked him if he could mind the 2 DDs (8 and 5) for a grand total of 10 minutes while I nipped quickly to Tesco to buy a couple of things, so I didn't have to take them both in the car with me unnecessarily. He said, 'I'm not up to minding both of them.'

I took them with me therefore, whilst seething to myself. All he had to do was switch the TV on for them, how hard work is that?? The number of times I've felt like that and he's left them with me to go to work!

I'm sure a lot of you have similar experiences, where your man has claimed not to be up to do with something because of his cold???

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy Wed 06-Dec-17 12:37:09

I would have said to him exactly what you wrote above.

Plus a few other choice words...

Why are you putting up with it?

Lizzie48 Wed 06-Dec-17 12:46:30

He doesn't have a cold all that often, thankfully. It's just that when he has one he behaves like a child. In fact, he didn't remember he'd said that when I spoke to him about it afterwards and agreed that he'd been selfish. We'll see what happens next time. hmm

wowbutter Wed 06-Dec-17 12:53:56

The mistake you made is asking.
"DH I am going to Tesco, I'll be back in ten mins, the kids are watching hey duggee, I.l bring you some more man flu pills and some oj. See ya.

And leave.

Afanofchocolate Wed 06-Dec-17 12:56:19

One of the best things I've ever learnt to do is to stop asking DH to mind his children.
He never asks me, so I asked myself why I ask him.

Now I say "I'm nipping to Tesco, will be back in 10."

meatyLoaf Wed 06-Dec-17 12:56:34

Yes all of them. Every single man is like this and you definitely aren't being sexist by suggesting otherwise.

He is EA and gaslighting you. What are you going to do about that? Do you want to bring your children up in this environment?

0hCrepe Wed 06-Dec-17 12:57:02

So annoying. I agree, don’t ask next time. My dh gets sympathy illness on the rare occasion I’m ill and has to lie down. Let’s say it’s rather wearing.

Afanofchocolate Wed 06-Dec-17 12:57:12

X post

BarbarianMum Wed 06-Dec-17 12:58:17

Hardly hmm

TheViceOfReason Wed 06-Dec-17 12:59:11

Jesus christ. Men behave like this because they are allowed to.

Why are you asking him if he can mind his own children for 10 minutes?

"Right DH, i'm nipping to Tesco, keep an eye on x and y".

If he complains ask him if he is fucking kidding and who does he think watches the kids if you are ill.

Lizzie48 Wed 06-Dec-17 13:30:28

No he's not emotionally abusive, just very annoying when he has a cold, thinks it's a massive issue. I agree that I shouldn't have asked him, I should have just said, 'I'm off to do a spot of shopping, I'll be back soon.'

But I did need to get it done quickly and I couldn't be bothered to argue about it.

overnightangel Wed 06-Dec-17 13:33:57

Just cos you put up with shite from your husband don’t tar all men with the same brush. Unbelievably ignorant

PinkHeart5914 Wed 06-Dec-17 13:34:37

Why ask if he can mind them? In my house it’s “Dh I am off out be back in 10, watch the dc”

My dh is very rarely ill but he did have a bad virus for about 10 days last month and he was still capable of watching our dc.

However I don’t think this makes your dh emotionally abusive so I’ve no idea why the pp says that!

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