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AIBU?

AIBU to think that 'silly' is not a nasty word

41 replies

Catscatsandmorecats · 04/12/2017 11:47

I'm genuinely interested in people's thoughts on this.

About a year ago I was saying to DS1 (then 2) that a cat was silly to be in the children's playground if it didn't want to be stroked. A slightly older boy told me off and said 'my mummy says silly is a bad word'. I thought this a little over the top and dismissed it, then recently one of the carers at nursery has said the same to DS.

So is it a nasty word? We use it as a kinder way to say someone is doing something stupid and to describe something funny that is a bit foolish too. From the dictionary definition this seems fine. DS is brilliant with words, loves learning new words and funny phrases and had a great vocabulary which I don't want to restrict (barring swearing obviously). But surely in the most part it is the context in which a word is used that can make it more/less nasty/offensive etc.

Not a stealth boast, I am openly proud of his language skills, he's not good with physical stuff or self care like others of his age, they're all different.

What do you think?

OP posts:
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00100001 · 04/12/2017 11:48

It's awful. How could you expose your child to such foul language. Do you even like your child OP?

Grin

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PsychoPumpkin · 04/12/2017 11:48

Not a bad word at all!

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firawla · 04/12/2017 11:50

Depends on the tone of voice I guess, but I call my dc silly billy and am not being mean, its light hearted. Could understand if they consider stupid a bad word but silly is much lighter

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Trinity66 · 04/12/2017 11:50

Don't be silly

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Basecamp21 · 04/12/2017 11:50

All depends on context - having my opinions dismissed at work as coming from a silly little woman would be incredibly offensive but having my Micheal caine impression called silly by my relatives as they wet themselves laughing would not be.

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SleepingStandingUp · 04/12/2017 11:51

Is he calling other children silly at school? Of so I can see why they're not happy but into the right context its surely a word most kids would know and understand

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Bunchofdaffodils · 04/12/2017 11:51

I always thought it was quite an affectionate word to use when someone’s made a mistake or doing something not very sensible, but my dh is thoroughly insulted if I ever say it to him.

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RestingGrinchFace · 04/12/2017 11:53

Not at all. How silly of them!

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RavingRoo · 04/12/2017 11:54

It’s less about the word and more about the reason it’s used. It’s wrong for kids to be judgemental at that age, and calling something or someone ‘silly’ implies they’re doing just that. It’s on a par with stupid.

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sirfredfredgeorge · 04/12/2017 11:56

"Your mummy's being fucking stupid, silly is not a bad word"

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Oysterbabe · 04/12/2017 11:57

We use it all the time with my 2 year old. She's always saying silly Daddy / Mummy / Doggy etc. I think it's fine.

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BlueKarou · 04/12/2017 12:01

Depends on the usage. In the past my sister has told my son (at about 18 months) not to be so silly when he was starting to make a fuss in public because he was tired and that's what young children do. That really got my back up.

On the other hand, I have no problems with an older child doing silly things being called 'silly'.

Definitely a matter of context.

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SleepingStandingUp · 04/12/2017 12:02

It’s wrong for kids to be judgemental at that age, and calling something or someone ‘silly’ implies they’re doing just that. It’s on a par with stupid
I'd think its more on par with funny ay that age. Oh look at the silly gear eating daisies aha rather than look at the stupid first eating daisies judgment-call

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CheeriosEverywhere · 04/12/2017 12:07

It’s wrong for kids to be judgemental at that age, and calling something or someone ‘silly’ implies they’re doing just that

Kids are judgemental though. If something or someone is silly, why would you not say so?

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SleepingStandingUp · 04/12/2017 12:10

It’s wrong for kids to be judgemental at that age, and calling something or someone ‘silly’ implies they’re doing just that
Also isn't being judgemental part of their own behaviour development? Learning to jisge what is naughty or nice, a god idea or a bad idea, kind or cruel or funny?

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ijustwannadance · 04/12/2017 12:13

When my DD was 3 she told me off for saying stupid. I wasn't even talking about a person. It had come from nursery.

I'd still call her a silly sausage if she does something daft.

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senua · 04/12/2017 12:15

a cat was silly to be in the children's playground if it didn't want to be stroked.

I think that silly is an acceptable word but don't you have to be careful about labelling. "The cat was doing a silly thing" is different from "the cat was silly".

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user1471546359 · 04/12/2017 12:17

At nursery they don’t use the word ‘naughty’, so they describe ‘naughty’ behaviour as silly instead...

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RavingRoo · 04/12/2017 12:18

@cheerios most of the kids I’ve met who use ‘silly’ use it in the context of judging someone who looks different and even bullying. For example kids in toddler nephew’s school called his brown skin silly, his glasses silly, and teased him by calling him silly billy until the school got tough on the behaviour and told parents they were adding silly to a list of forbidden words. These are three and four year olds. Imagine it would be worse for older kids.

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SleepingStandingUp · 04/12/2017 12:21

Kids will just find another way though if all they are doing is outlawing a word but tackling the actual bias. Whether its a crap appropriation like gay or a slang word that teachers can't figure out for 6 months

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Beeziekn33ze · 04/12/2017 12:29

The 7 year old going to his first football match and his DF was worried about him hearing swearing. He asked him what swear words he knew and 7 year old solemnly told him 'silly' and 'idiot', words which he said were banned at school!

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CheeriosEverywhere · 04/12/2017 13:15

@cheerios most of the kids I’ve met who use ‘silly’ use it in the context of judging someone who looks different and even bullying

toddlers? I find that hard to believe.

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SmileEachDay · 04/12/2017 13:19

There is. Mr Silly. Ergo it’s fine.

AIBU to think that 'silly' is not a nasty word
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coconuttella · 04/12/2017 13:25

It’s wrong for kids to be judgemental at that age, and calling something or someone ‘silly’ implies they’re doing just that

Disagree strongly. You’re surely repressing their development if you try and prevent them from making any judgment or opinion on situations or people. Why would you want to do that? Are they meant to live in a world where everything and everyone is always wonderful! Talk about trying to wrap your child in cotton wool!

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coconuttella · 04/12/2017 13:29

”The cat was doing a silly thing" is different from "the cat was silly".

So an animal can’t be termed “silly” without it causing offence?! Ridiculous!

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