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To want his birthday not to be connected with Christmas?

(172 Posts)
MrsBonato Wed 29-Nov-17 16:09:24

My dc is 4 on Monday. The very beginning of December. He was due on Christmas Eve and thankfully came early. I thought we wouldn't have Christmas things around his birthday.
Last year my bil and sil sent his birthday gifts wrapped in Christmas paper. I was ok with it and didn't make any comment until ds went to open them and said 'these are Christmas presents'. DH then had a bit of a moan to mil who I presume said to bil about it as we got a apology via text a little while after.

This year he has received a gift from a friend of the family, I had a sneak look at what it was, she clearly said it was for his birthday. It is a snowman Christmas ornament with chocolate coins and an advent calendar. My ds will again say that these are Christmas things.

I wouldn't be surprised if bil and sil repeat what they did last year either.

Am I being ungrateful? Is my dc being ungrateful in thinking he hasn't actually been given birthday gifts but just Christmas gifts?

And anyone else with a child who has a birthday even closer to Christmas, how do you deal with it?

LunasSpectreSpecs Wed 29-Nov-17 16:15:44

No that's shite behaviour. A family member of mine has his birthday on Christmas Day. I always make sure to wrap his presents in normal birthday paper and wouldn't dream of buying Christmas themed presents. And he's a grown up!

MissConductUS Wed 29-Nov-17 16:15:59

My dd (now 15) was born within a few days of Christmas. We have a birthday party for her before Christmas and it's never really been an issue. She still gets Christmas gifts from everyone.

FloorStickers Wed 29-Nov-17 16:20:29

My friends birthday is a few days before Christmas, she said her entire life birthday presents have been wrapped in Christmas paper or been given as a joint birthday/Christmas thing. She hates it. Nip it in the bud now.

BrieAndChilli Wed 29-Nov-17 16:22:10

My DS1 is only a couple of days before Christmas and we’ve never come across him being given xmas themed things as a present or even joint things. He might possibly have had things wrapped in xmas paper but then I wrap birthday presents in xmas paper all year round!! (Eg each kid has a themed paper for their father xmas presents. It’s different each year so last year was shopkins, paw patrol and Star Wars so through out the year any kids presents for birthdays/parties was wrapped in that paper) sonit wohldnt really bother me. FIL often gives gifts wrapped in plastic bags!!!

MrsCharlesBrandon Wed 29-Nov-17 16:24:26

DD1 (almost 14) has a birthday within a few days of Christmas. We've always done our level best to make sure any celebration is clearly a Birthday one, and thankfully none of her friends or relatives have done any different.

I don't think it's too much to ask for a December birthday to be clearly separate from Christmas.

EmilyChambers79 Wed 29-Nov-17 16:26:03

We are the opposite way round and it infuriates me. DS birthday is end of Jan and he gets presents off Aunt and Uncle for Christmas that are for his birthday too. Last year's present was an annual and a selection box.

MissMooMoo Wed 29-Nov-17 16:26:44

Yes its shit!
My birthday is the 1 of Dec and I hated getting Christmas things and also presents wrapped in Christmas paper!
My best friend has 2 DC born in December and I make lots of effort to get birthday things and wrap in birthday paper.

Whambarsarentasfizzyastheywere Wed 29-Nov-17 16:27:10

Christmas paper is cheap, it doesnt really matter what the present is wrapped in does it?

I buy Christmassy things around Christmas time birthdays and summer toys for summer birthdays and Halloween stuff at Halloween birthdays.

It's thoughtful of people to buy and wrap and send a present for your son.

(Christmas time birthday here and it's never bothered me one bit and I would feel rude complaining)

The only thing I would get annoyed about is if family sent a joint xmas/birthday present while sending seperate for others.

brownpurse Wed 29-Nov-17 16:28:59

I remember another thread on this and a lot of people seemed to think Christmas wrapping paper didn't matter. I think most of them were those with birthdays well away from December. It actually does matter . December birthday people have their birthdays completely over shadowed by Christmas. The least the rest of us can do is find birthday paper and keep away from the Christmas theme as presents.

TheNewSchmoo Wed 29-Nov-17 16:29:17

It's my nieces birthday on 7th. I've bought her a present, card and birthday wrap it was no more effort than any other time of year. These people are being arseholes.

OpalIridescence Wed 29-Nov-17 16:30:50

My child's birthday is a few days before Christmas.
I had a couple of relatives tried the 'joint' Christmas and birthday present. I was uncharacteristically blunt and told them they could expect one present a year for their children if they did, no matter the birth month.
It isn't about the present, it is about the child and the birthday not being obviously less important than all the others.

Bumbumtaloo Wed 29-Nov-17 16:31:59

My dd’s birthday is 28th December and luckily we have never had this. We did put our foot down when we realised when she was due (early January). And we’ve actually had parties on her birthday, I’ve never seen so many kids at a parties grin.

If I was in this situation I would be having a big conversation with them, it’s not your ds’s fault he was born when he was.

Hoppinggreen Wed 29-Nov-17 16:32:16

My dc have Birthdays on the 14th and 23rd . Neither us or any family give them a joint present or wrap their Birthday presents in Xmas wrap.
I wouldn’t be happy in your shoes

Katescurios Wed 29-Nov-17 16:32:17

My DH has his birthday a few days before xmas and hates joint or Xmas themed birthday presents. The only thing that's difficult is buying any form of chocolate as it all seems to have snowflakes on the packaging.

coragreta Wed 29-Nov-17 16:32:19

I think you’re son is being a bit ungrateful. What does it matter what paper it’s wrapped in or if it’s ‘Christmas’ themed. It’s the thought that counts. My dds birthday is just before Xmas and all her presents are wrapped in Xmas paper and some even linked to her main Xmas present. Doesn’t matter. She will enjoy her presents regardless.

coragreta Wed 29-Nov-17 16:33:46

Also my birthday is early January and I always get joint presents. Usually just means people spend a bit more and I get a better bigger present rather than two little ones.

Bumbumtaloo Wed 29-Nov-17 16:34:39

Another thing that pisses me off are the ‘on your December birthday’ cards. I don’t send or receive cards saying ‘on your May birthday’ etc.

BitOutOfPractice Wed 29-Nov-17 16:35:31

So Bil sent a perfectly acceptable birthday present but wrapped in the wrong paper (have you never had to scrabble around your wrapping paper?) and apologised when you (via your Mil) rudely complained about it. And now you're all ready to get on your high horse again this year, when he hasn't even done anything wrong yet?

You sound ungrateful and tbh so does your ds.

SausagePerfume Wed 29-Nov-17 16:35:49

1st December isn't too bad, I'm sure if you put your foot down about non Christmas related presents for birthdays he'll have a happy enough time.
My birthday is very near Christmas and I've always enjoyed it. Everyone is in a festive spirit, loads of things going on. Teach him to look at it with a glass half full attitude.

If anyone dares to keep on with Christmas birthday gifts you could always get your own back by insisting on say giving them an Easter egg as a present if they have a spring birthday!

BewareOfDragons Wed 29-Nov-17 16:35:57

Growing up, I knew twins that were born on Christmas day. I can only imagine the kinds of things they used to get and have to share to boot!

LagunaBubbles Wed 29-Nov-17 16:36:07

Christmas paper is cheap, it doesnt really matter what the present is wrapped in does it?

Of course it does, wrapped in Christmas paper indicates a Christmas present and children are well aware of this. A sheet of birthday paper is also cheap and indicates the person has actually thought about the childs birthday rather than wrapping in Christmas paper.

TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot Wed 29-Nov-17 16:37:22

My DS's Birthday is in August. I wrap his presents in Christmas paper.

Otherwise, YANBU. It must be upsetting for a young child to feel their Birthday is getting lost in Christmas.

AlpacaLypse Wed 29-Nov-17 16:38:28

I have a dear friend whose birthday is Christmas Day. I take real pleasure in trying to find the most sunshiney summery card I possibly can to send her each year.

GreenTulips Wed 29-Nov-17 16:39:39

I buy Christmassy things around Christmas time birthdays and summer toys for summer birthdays and Halloween stuff at Halloween birthdays

It's thoughtful of people to buy and wrap and send a present for your son

It's not thoughtful in the slightest it's lazy - why would a Halloween birthday mean they want Halloween stuff? Just why?

Mines near Valentine's Day - I don't want love hearts and chocolates

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