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To wonder why people assume posters are men when

(165 Posts)
poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 01:35:48

they don't like what they post.

There was a thread yesterday where a poster criticised the readability of another. Admittedly, the former was being goady but I do wonder why they immediately became a man in the eyes of others on the thread.

Does it show that there is in fact deep-seated sexism in both sexes?

LineysRunner Wed 29-Nov-17 01:42:20

This site is frequently subject to invasions by goady MRA fuckers. Indeed MNHQ has recently specifically commented on it and appealed for vigilance and reports.

I think that explains it. You don't need to invoke a superficial gender analysis in AIBU. However if you do want to dig deeper into the MRA's motivations, there's plenty on Feminist Chat and indeed in Site Stuff.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 01:44:31

They were picking on grammar; hardly provocative stuff.

Are you saying that goady posters should be assumed to be male because they're goady?

TheClaws Wed 29-Nov-17 01:49:47

There’s plenty of bitchy women so, no, I don’t assume a poster is male at all if I’m irritated by a post.

Graphista Wed 29-Nov-17 01:52:26

Men do tend to use different language to women whether they're Mra or not. It's usually fairly easy to suss. But I still try not to assume.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 02:03:20

I'm pretty amazed that you think you can split the sexes by the language they use on a forum!

BitOfFun Wed 29-Nov-17 02:11:41

Well, there are several online calculators like this which claim some level of accuracy beyond a 50% guess, but often the sheer sense of entitlement gives it away.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 02:18:32


Did you respond to the wrong post?

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 02:33:18

Entitlement makes sense.

Are you okay OP?

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 02:38:58

I'm fine. I wasn't being obtuse. I didn't notice the link in the reply.

I can't believe that the BitofFun thought there was a sense of entitlement in posts that lets you know the sex of the poster.

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 02:50:02

You know years of academic endeavour and acres of trees have gone into studying the gendered nature of communication styles?

I know it's not a perfect science. I've been accused on here of being a man, which I'm not, more than once myself. But I'm probably the exception that proves the rule. I'm certainly unfrilly.

DrinkFeckArseGirls Wed 29-Nov-17 02:55:37

I can definitely see a difference between texts from my male and female friends.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 02:57:59

I didn't and wouldn't read it anyway. I doubt that most of the accusers are well read on the subject. I think the fact that it's used as an insult and not as the result of knowledgeable individuals carefully analysing the discourse, it seems quite nasty and sexist.

I've also been accused of being a man. It really pissed me off. Other insults on here are like water off a duck's back but that really wound me up; I think the hypocrisy of it.

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 03:08:57

I didn't and wouldn't read it anyway. I doubt that most of the accusers are well read on the subject.

By "accusers" you mean the academic researchers? confused

MrsTerryPratchett Wed 29-Nov-17 03:10:39

I'm pretty amazed that you think you can split the sexes by the language they use on a forum!

Well you can. Not me personally. But MI5 and the FBI do it. This is amusing and enlightening in meetings.

I think it's amusing that "the fact that it's used as an insult" and "I've also been accused of being a man. It really pissed me off" is funny. Why does it piss you off that people think you're male if it's not insulting? They may think you're male because you have only posted a few times and are already minimizing sexism. You're right though, women do that too.

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 03:13:14

You do seem quite angry and keen to tell everyone off OP.

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 03:14:20

Ah, sorry, I think you mean the "accusers" here.

So why would you refuse to read research findings?

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 03:22:25


No, "accusers" referred to people on MN who change to s/he or simply masculine pronouns.


You misunderstood me (or I was unclear). "It's used an as insult" shows that I do think it's used as an insult. It pissed me off because I don't want to be seen as a man simply because I disagree with someone else. I think it's a lazy ands sexist put down. I also want equality of the sexes and don't think "talk like a man" or "cry / throw like a girl" should ever be used. I suspect I often refer to posters as women here because I assume most are. I wouldn't switch to male pronouns to make a snide point though.

I can't be bothered to do an advanced search (as you did) but I suspect you've used "s/he" to make a PA point. As I said earlier, you and others who do so are being insulting and sexist; you aren't doing it from an academic point but bringing sex into an arguement.

I've posted thousands and thousands of times. I like a monthly name-change though. What difference does it make?

Where have I minimised sexism?

Kualabear Wed 29-Nov-17 03:24:40

It is easy to detect men on here - they don't swear so much😀

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 03:28:05

Half the time the "As a man, I think..." provides a useful clue wink

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 03:32:38

I've no idea why you think I'm angry.

Perhaps a little frustrated or perplexed. Certainly not looking to tell people off. I posted to try to understand.

I won't break TAAT rules but the thread which led me to start this was one where the poster was being a bit goady but certainly nothing gendered in their posts. Once people decided that they weren't being helpful pronouns changed to male.

I wouldn't read academic papers in an area which has little interest for me because I don't have time. I'm in academia (Computer Science) and struggle to read everything I need to before adding more. I don't doubt that men and women communicate differently. I do doubt that most posters here can differentiate though. I also feel that the reasons for changing pronouns is to insult.

Haha Kuala. Yep, the fucking and cunting here would make a sailor cringe. That's a debate for another thread smile

MrsTerryPratchett Wed 29-Nov-17 03:33:05

I can't be bothered to do an advanced search (as you did) but I suspect you've used "s/he" to make a PA point. I did one because I remembered you from another thread. I very rarely remember names.

And I have noticed that people that shorten my NN to Pratchett are generally being snippy. It's a funny little thing but almost always true. MrsTP, Terry, MrsTerry, MrsPratchett all seem to indicate non-snippy posters.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 03:34:39


You're digging deep to find offence!

Battleax Wed 29-Nov-17 03:34:43

Maybe it's just a case of getting your eye in? The same as trolldar.

poolCam Wed 29-Nov-17 03:41:28

Maybe ... trolls can be ignored and tend to flock to the same vaguely contentious subjects though.

Don't you see parallels between "post like a man" and "cry like a girl"?

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