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To chase this money?

(10 Posts)
MHMoneydilema Fri 24-Nov-17 10:34:42

A couple of weeks ago my oldest friend called and asked me for an urgent loan. She has severe MH issues, is single and lives abroad. She had fallen behind on rent and LL was threatening action. I paid 500 quid straightaway.

Friend promised very prompt repayment but I asked her to wait until she could access and transfer funds properly in a few days. ( didn't want her feeling guilty and doing something silly like a back street loan). However it has now been 2 weeks. The money is not causing immediate cash flow problems for me but has made a big dent in savings .

How can I raise this with her?I have a bad feeling she is so stressed by it she hasn't been able to leave her bed ( crippling depression and anxiety issues) and obviously I don't want to make it worse. But also I don't want it hanging over her ( I know she should now have received the cash she needed- what I offered was a bridging loan) She works freelance in a professional role and can earn good money - however she finds organising her finances and invoicing customers really, really hard.) It is arranging a transfer which is a barrier to her not the actual money IYSWIM.

Should I just let it go for now? I know she will repay - she is due to visit in a few months and we could just sort it out then? Or is it best to try and sort it before her guilt complex kicks in?

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Fri 24-Nov-17 10:40:19

I would email or text so it's in writing, confirm it was a loan and ask when you can expect it back. Say you understand she's not well so doesn't have to be imminent but you need to move money around to cover it so need a date. She could do it online from her phone if she has the money in her account of course...

Booboobooboo84 Fri 24-Nov-17 10:41:34

Could you give her the option of instalments?

MHMoneydilema Fri 24-Nov-17 11:28:11

Thank you.

I would do anything that makes it easier. But because she's not uk based I don't think it's good to pay transfer fees several times over. Also because she's abroad then it's a bit trickier than using her phone ( as well as the issues with online banking which got her into the mess with the landlord in the first place).

SleepingStandingUp Fri 24-Nov-17 11:43:45

Is check in with her and see how she is. Then so.etching like let me know when you can do the transfer so I can check its received? If you need to delay paying it back, ease let me know

Missonihoni Fri 24-Nov-17 13:15:39

I don't understand why you have lent her money told her not to rush to repay and then now are
Moaning you don't have it back. You should have agreed a date for repayment. I know that's useless in hindsight

If it's bothering you just drop her a text and say hi hope your well I was just wondering when to expect the payment back from you.

Good luck.

howmanyusernames Fri 24-Nov-17 15:36:51

I had a similar situation, loan was being paid back but not very regularly and sometimes nothing for 3-4 months. I said my accountant had noticed the money going out, was asking questions about what it was for so it needed to be paid back before X month. The payments are monthly now.

babyturtles Fri 24-Nov-17 15:49:27

I'd leave it another 2 weeks, so you know she's definitely been paid in that time and has the funds to repay you.

SusannahL Fri 24-Nov-17 16:00:20

From what you've said, it was agreed she would pay you back in a few days. It's now been two weeks so I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to gently remind her. It's not like it's ten or twenty pounds is it?

You say she's depressed but that certainly wouldn't prevent her leaving her bed.

Ellisandra Fri 24-Nov-17 16:52:54

The longer you leave it the harder it will be.
Transfer fees are her problem - and really they're not going to be much.
She's not so incapacitated that she couldn't get it together to ask you for it!

Text her - hey friend, I need that £500 back this week before my (rent/mortgage) goes out. <bank details> Thanks!

If she's been distracted that'll remind her. If she's taking the piss it won't take you long to know that.

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