AIBU to not want to babysit

[pickyourselfupandtryagain]

Hello !

My friend just messaged me this morning to babysit her (15 month old) daughter for an hour or two so she can go to an appointment. AIBU to say no ? I’m utterly exhausted, haven’t had a good night sleep in two weeks, having horrendous mornings with seven year old DS which drains my energy. This is my day off from work and I wanted to use that time to relax and go to sleep !

Would it be mean of me to say no ? I feel like I’m always putting others needs before mine.

[Butterymuffin]

No. Just say you're not well so can't do it. She needs to arrange her childcare earlier, or if it's a GP appointment for instance, she'll have to take the toddler along.

[Ellendegeneres]

Course not, just say to her you're not feeling well so hope she's able to find someone to help and good luck with appointment.

[ZigZagIntoTheBlue]

No yanbu- you have to look out for yourself first sometimes, and I say that as someone who often puts others first (and is in a waiting room with a friend looking after my ds!) Just say sorry you can't this morning, hope all goes well at her appointment.

[StayAChild]

Depends on the friend really? Does she often spring this on you?

I'd be delighted actually. Would tell her to bring the buggy and take a long walk to boost your energy.

[Ellendegeneres]

Bit last minute anyway, it kind of implies she thinks you're free no matter what.

[SloeSloeQuickQuickGin]

What sort of appointment? Eg hair, no way, urgent medical, yes.

[Kentnurse2015]

It's a tricky one as would you like the favour returned one day? It's not unreasonable to say no but if you were in a sticky situation then maybe you would need a hand like she does now?

[pickyourselfupandtryagain]

I think for cosmetic surgery appointment. We have been friends for years but she always ask for favours all the time, even to other friends of hers.

[Tinselistacky]

Hi friend no problem as long as lunch is on you afterwards...

[StealthNinjaMum]

I was just about to say it depends on the nature of the appointment, how close you are and whether she has a history of taking the piss.

Then I saw your update and it sounds like she takes the piss a lot so yanbu.

[Pouncival]

you're not well - look after yourself otherwise you'll be useless for your own child - tell her "no"

[StayAChild]

Re your update, in that case no I wouldn't.
She should have organised it way before the day.

[Ttbb]

It depends-does she do the same for you? If so yes, if not then no.

[coddiwomple]

She is not unreasonable to ask, but why do you think you have to say yes?

If it's not emergency appointment, she is BU to leave it at the very last minute, but then it's easier to reply that "sorry, I can't do this morning".

[Trinity66]

She should have organised something before not just assumed you'd do it that day, it's your day off, say no

[Willow2017]

Just say you arent well and you are goung back to bed. You need to look after yourself first when you feel crap.

Its not like its an emergency she has known about this for a while she just expects you to be free as its your day off and hasnt bothered to get anyone else.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

ignore message dont reply, go to bed and ignore doorbell

reply later saying you just saw this and sorry you couldnt help

[RhiannonOHara]

YANBU. Unless it was an emergency appointment, surely she could have got her childcare in place in better time?

[mindutopia]

Absolutely not, it's your day off and you just don't want to. You need no more justification than that. It doesn't sound like it's a particularly urgent appt or one that she didn't have plenty of time to plan for. Also, I intentionally schedule my own medical appts for times when I know I'll have my dd (because why rely on childcare when I can take her with me) as it's easy to bring them along.

[IceFall]

Just say you aren't feeling up to it "sorry love, really not feeling up to any babysitting today. See you soon xx"

[GreenFingersWouldBeHandy]

If it was a medical emergency then yes YABU.

But cosmetic surgery? No chance! Why did she leave it so late? Go back to bed and enjoy your kip.

[dontquotemeondailymail]

“Would love to but feeling really ill and need to sleep it off before DS gets home, plus wouldn’t want to pass it on to your daughter.”

And yes, SIBU asking you last minute! (Especially for cosmetic appointment, WTF?!)

[Sarahh2014]

Cosmetic surgery as in going under anaesthetic? She should have that sorted ages ago as they give you a date.yanbu