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To think 25 yr old DSD is old enough to make her own Xmas plans?

(82 Posts)
K1092902 Tue 21-Nov-17 20:19:18

DSD is 25 and has lived with me and DH for nearly 6 months after a pretty big falling out with her mum.

We are planning on visiting DHs relatives over Xmas- except DSD doesn't want to go. She wants to spend time with her boyfriend and her friends and i think she is old enough to make her own decisions.

Shes not a massive Xmas dinner fan anyway so i was going to cook her er favourite tea to heat up for Xmas day and leave her a bottle of wine to drink and give her presents before we.

DH has got a titty lip on.

AIBU?

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Tue 21-Nov-17 20:20:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheNoseyProject Tue 21-Nov-17 20:20:56

No that’s fine. Why isn’t she going to get boyfriend’s?

HelloSquirrels Tue 21-Nov-17 20:22:12

Shes 25 ffs of course shes old enough to do what she wants!

Bringmewineandcake Tue 21-Nov-17 20:22:33

A titty lip? grin

She’s 25! Does your DH want to drag her round his rellies like a sulky teenager?

MrBloomsLeftVeg Tue 21-Nov-17 20:23:08

Need to know what a titty lip is please?

DO3271 Tue 21-Nov-17 20:23:42

YANBU

She is a grown woman, and has been for some time.

AnxietyStrikes Tue 21-Nov-17 20:24:00

I'm a 26 year old mother with my own family and my mum still doesn't let me do what I want to do on Christmas day.
It causes huge resentment and I constantly feel under massive pressure. Ruins Christmas for me.
Let her do what's she wants don't ruin it for her like my mum does ever year.

Anniegetyourgun Tue 21-Nov-17 20:24:25

If she's 25 she's also old enough not to have her tea cooked for her, to lay in her own bottles and to pick out her presents under the tree where all right-thinking people place them, surely?

daisypond Tue 21-Nov-17 20:24:43

What does DH think should happen? She go with you, or you all stay at home together? Or something else?

DancesWithOtters Tue 21-Nov-17 20:25:29

She’s a fully grown adult.

What does DH want her to do?

I’d leave her to it. She sounds like she knows what she wants to do.

Itsnotmesothere Tue 21-Nov-17 20:25:41

You sound like a fabuously indulgent stepmum! How nice of you. Your husband needs to get a grip. She is 25! YANBU

Itsnotmesothere Tue 21-Nov-17 20:28:53

Are you scared of your mum, anxietystrikes ? It's hard but why not say "this year we'll be having christmas by ourselves, as a family. See you on Boxing Day?"

Crunchymum Tue 21-Nov-17 20:30:51

DH's relatives are her relatives too?

K1092902 Tue 21-Nov-17 20:30:53

Basically yes- he wants to drag her around like a sulky teenager. We are only going for 2 nights but she will be miserable and it is her Xmas as well!

Namechangetempissue Tue 21-Nov-17 20:31:08

Yoi sound great! Would love you as a SM. YANBU

DancesWithOtters Tue 21-Nov-17 20:33:18

Tell him not to be absurd. She’s not 12.

Mrsmadevans Tue 21-Nov-17 20:34:47

Good God she is 25 ! Tell DH she will prob have a whale of a time with all her friends at the party she will throw in your absence lol

HeebieJeebies456 Tue 21-Nov-17 20:35:28

She's 25 years old.......why isn't she living in her own place?

You both need to stop infantilising her............

NoSquirrels Tue 21-Nov-17 20:35:43

Eh? 25 year old boy ants to hang with friends at Christmas and your DH thinks she should come away with him ... why, exactly? Did he miss the whole 18th birthday = adult thing?

Runningbutnotscared Tue 21-Nov-17 20:35:50

This place is full of odd sayings today. I hated 'butt hurt' and now there's 'titty lip'. WTF is a 'titty lip'?

ForagingForFaerieGold Tue 21-Nov-17 20:36:19

Titty lip.- Sulky face, pouting etc. To get your own way. And yes, he's being ridiculous.

NoSquirrels Tue 21-Nov-17 20:36:22

Not sure what boy ants are! DYAC.

VimFuego101 Tue 21-Nov-17 20:38:29

Titty lip grin

Why would he want to make her spend Christmas somewhere she doesn't want to be? What you're suggesting sounds fine.

Wilburissomepig Tue 21-Nov-17 20:39:36

No of course you're not being unreasonable and the fact you have used the quite fabulous 'titty lip' phrase, means I like the cut of your jib anyway. grin

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