Leaving lunch

[HarveySherlock]

I am leaving my job after Christmas so have suggested that we go out for lunch which is the usual practice when someone leaving. This is in lieu of having a leaving do.

Everyone of my team is full time. Everyone is entitled to at least 30 minutes for lunch. We can take up to 2 hours if we wish as long as we have flexi to cover it. One person (A) has said no she doesn't want to go as she only has 30 minutes to have lunch. Our boss has already agreed we can take the full two hours if we want.

I went ahead and booked the lunch for those who said they would come. A has now complained she is being excluded as she isn't going as she doesn't want to use her flexi on it, rather than her not having flexi to use.

A has now said either lunch should be cancelled or we should not have to use flexi. If the lunch goes ahead she will complain to HR. I am a bit hurt that for others she will go on longer lunches but not me. It is also causing bad feelings in the office towards her by other teammates.

Aibu to say fine, just don't come, go to HR and leave boss and teammates to deal with the fallout after I am gone? Or should I cancel?

[lucylouuu]

don’t cancel! go anyway, she sounds ridiculous. it’s your meal and if she doesn’t want to go then fine

[honeysucklejasmine]

A is behaving very strangely. Do you normally get on?

[SandyDenny]

Let her go to HR as you say you'll be gone anyway. As long as you're not doing anything differently to any other previous leaver there's not much they can say.

[ClaryFray]

Let her go to HR. Or organise a working lunch in the office. Pizza or something.

[blueskyinmarch]

A is being weird. Just go for the lunch. She is not being excluded - she could go but has made a clear choice that she doesn't want to use her flexi leave as the others are doing.

[SassySausageSupper]

She sounds like an idiot. Just go ahead and have it. What would HR even do about it? Especially as you’re leaving!

[mumonashoestring]

Sounds like there's some kind of power play going on there - she made a fuss about people having to use flexi, expected other people to follow suit and now that they haven't she looks like a tit and is making a fuss about being excluded to distract from her original whinge. She hasn't been excluded at all, as others have said she's made a choice without having any pressure put on her either way.

[Plainlycrackers]

Suspect A is intending to use every spare scrap of her flexi for maxing her festive holiday... incredible sense of self importance that she should think that her attendance is essential for it to go ahead... Carry on... I cannot imagine HR doing anything other than chortling after she has left with their “So What?” Ringing in her ears... entitled madam!

[Pancakeflipper]

A is being very hard work. Let her go to HR.

[goingbonkers123]

Are you insisting that the lunch is two hours and she’ll need to use 1.5 hrs of her flexi to attend? or is she assuming it will take two hours (ie to get there and back / set menu etc) - if so it sounds like she doesn’t want to use her flexi for lunch. if so you could suggest she comes for lunch and leaves earlier - say an hour?

She seems very odd - anyway you’re leaving so it doesn’t really matter, I wouldn’t change your plans to accommodate her specifically.

[loveka]

She sounds like a total knob. Is she always like this, ie pedantic jobsworth type?

Don't cancel. It sounds like she has an axe to grind with work, not you.

[Polidori]

A is an idiot. Being invited ad choosing not to go isn't being excluded. Let her go to HR where she will learn whether they're any good at disguising laughter. I certainly don't think you should cancel

[FeelingAggrieved]

Fuck her. I wouldn't want her at my meal. YANBU.

[crisscrosscranky]

I manage an HR dept- please go and let her complain. Frivolous grievances like these can brighten up a dull day.

Enjoy your lunch!

[emmyrose2000]

A is an unreasonable idiot. Ignore her and go on the lunch as planned.

If I'm understanding correctly, she was invited to the lunch, declined of her own volition, and is now claiming she was excluded? She's nuts.