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AIBU?

Dad taking dd to ladies toilet

550 replies

AdaHopper · 18/11/2017 21:05

MN - help dh and I with a disagreement please.

When dd(4) needs the loo in a public place, he takes her to the ladies' loos. I told him that women don't like that and he should take her to the men's loo. Aibu or is he?

OP posts:
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RunningOutOfCharge · 18/11/2017 21:07

he is

I've never seen a man do this before.....ever

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clary · 18/11/2017 21:08

He is out of order. I do recall DH saying DD needed to get used to going into the ladies by herself if he was out without me, as men's los can be grim... she was older than four tho.

At four she is going to have to go in the men's. Best thing is to find a nicer one? Or at my local shopping centre they have a family loo which seems a good idea.

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pickleypockley · 18/11/2017 21:09

Difficult one really as yes I wouldn't want a man coming g into the ladies, but the men's have open urinals so he might not want dd seeing that? At risk of a Munster bashing I would say use the disabled Confused

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dementedpixie · 18/11/2017 21:09

He should go to the men's with her

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 18/11/2017 21:10

He is wrong.

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pickleypockley · 18/11/2017 21:10

Mumsnet, bloody phone, you are not all munsters Smile

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Sofabitch · 18/11/2017 21:10

We just need to ditch the group toilets really. Its a totally weird concept.

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TheDevilMadeMeDoIt · 18/11/2017 21:11

I understand the conflict, but I would rather a father in the ladies - individual cubicles - than a four year old girl being taken into the gents with no idea what she might see. (And I've wandered into the gents accidentally a couple of times, they're not nice places! Smelly, grubby.....)

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Readermumof3 · 18/11/2017 21:12

What is it with all these toilet issues lately? Hmm There’s no way in hell my DH would ever set foot in a ladies loo. When DD was small he’d take her to a baby change loo or the gents in a dept store cafe if nearby.

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Helspopje · 18/11/2017 21:12

Definitely prefer a young girl.in the ladies than going into the men's with open urinals

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Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 18/11/2017 21:12

sofabitch

Its not a weird concept at all

I much prefer the individual non sexed cubicles with their own sink that many of the newer shopping centres etc have

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CarcerDun · 18/11/2017 21:14

I still have memories of being taken into men’s loos as a child shudders. They are horrible. But mostly the memories are sound and smell as DF has his hands over my eyes for the majority of the time.

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Notevilstepmother · 18/11/2017 21:14

It wouldn’t bother me and it’s probably much nicer for her than seeing/smelling men weeing at the urinals.

I do think we should have family toilets or something for these situations.

However it’s not like women take their clothes off at the basins or anything.

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Maplestaple · 18/11/2017 21:15

I can see this from both sides, it wouldn't bother me but I know how it could upset others.

I wouldn't want my DS going in the men's either.

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Maplestaple · 18/11/2017 21:15

DD not DS

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Pixie2015 · 18/11/2017 21:15

I would prefer to see a man take his daughter into ladies if no family/disabled toilet available don’t think any young child needs urinal or stinky cubicle exposure

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Intercom · 18/11/2017 21:16

I’ve never seen anyone do that. It’s usual for the adult to go in the correct toilets, and if the child is under about 8 they go in the same one as the parent.

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Notevilstepmother · 18/11/2017 21:16

Most toilets have signs warning that there might be male cleaners anyway.

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converseandjeans · 18/11/2017 21:17

Agree with devil I would have no issue with seeing a man in the ladies loo with a small child needing a wee. I really wouldn't want my DD at the age of 4 heading into the mens loos. They stink and blokes have their k*s out!! I would say perhaps compromise would be to send her in alone and stand by the door and wait for her?

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Gileswithachainsaw · 18/11/2017 21:17

He should take her to the men's. It's what dads and grandad have had to Do since well... years and years.

When she's a bit older she can go to the ladies on her own.

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RunningOutOfCharge · 18/11/2017 21:17

what will a 4 year old 'see' in the mens toilet that has you all recoiling in horror?

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Coconutsgreen · 18/11/2017 21:17

I understand the conflict, but I would rather a father in the ladies - individual cubicles - than a four year old girl being taken into the gents with no idea what she might see. (And I've wandered into the gents accidentally a couple of times, they're not nice places! Smelly, grubby.....)

Totally agree with this.

I wouldn't be offended at all.if a man took his little girl in to use the ladies.

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Believeitornot · 18/11/2017 21:18

Men’s toilets are grim. I wouldn’t want my dd going in. I’d rather dh found a disabled loo.

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Pennywhistle · 18/11/2017 21:19

DH always took DD into the gents without incident.

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Moanyoldcow · 18/11/2017 21:19

I always say the same on these posts and accept that my view is not the norm, but I don't care at all what sex/gender people I share toilets with so long as there are cubicles.

I'd have no issue with a dad and daughter in the ladies toilets.

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