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To think we cannot afford a second baby :(

(192 Posts)
winkletwinkletoes Tue 14-Nov-17 19:57:17

Currently feeling sad sad

Really want another baby in the next year or so. Have a 5 1/2 year old.

We both work full time. Joint income
Of around £2600 after tax. Our bills equate to about £2000 due to just buying a first house with eye watering interest rate envy

Realistically how can we afford another child if the childcare would be £500-£600 a month.

Got no family who can help... well not willing to help. Obviously long term we want a good quality of life and I can't see us being able to have both.

Can it be done or no??? flowers

Happydoingitjusttheonce Tue 14-Nov-17 19:58:56

I’m afraid the sums don’t add up. Enjoy what you have

MrsHathaway Tue 14-Nov-17 20:00:07

Baby is the cheapest stage, too.

I'm sorry your head and heart don't agree.

Allthewaves Tue 14-Nov-17 20:00:36

Is that every single outgoing - food, clothes, petrol, travel costs etc

winkletwinkletoes Tue 14-Nov-17 20:05:01

It includes food and petrol. Not including like clothes or unknown expenses!

Not entitled to any help with benefits as " we earn to much"

I get so annoyed. I work with families who don't look after their children and have more disposable income than me. Makes no sense I hate this life. No point In working sometimes.

acquiescence Tue 14-Nov-17 20:05:30

Can you condense your hours- work longer days for an extra day off? Can you go interest only on your mortgage for a couple of years?

beepboopbeep Tue 14-Nov-17 20:06:28

I feel for you op. Childcare would be at least double that here.

Can you both earn more money?

winterstail Tue 14-Nov-17 20:06:40

Babies aren't really the cheapest stage at all. Childcare is a killer.

Bombardier25966 Tue 14-Nov-17 20:07:06

Why the eye watering interest rate? Rates are historically very low at present.

beepboopbeep Tue 14-Nov-17 20:07:20

Also what is your interest rate? They’re low at the moment so I’m surprised

PenelopeFlintstone Tue 14-Nov-17 20:07:30

Could you copy what those families do, just for a few years?

Tipsytopsyturvy Tue 14-Nov-17 20:08:20

Could you drop hours? Would that work to save any costs on childcare?

hotbutteredcrumpetsandtea Tue 14-Nov-17 20:09:24

Baby is the cheapest stage, too

Why do people say this? It's not true. Childcare for a baby vs childcare for afterschool, baby equpiment and ephemera, loss of earnings on maternity, rapid growth requiring more of everything....baby is the most expensive stage until teens.

AnnabellaH Tue 14-Nov-17 20:10:38

What is the eyewatering interest rate? At 4.5% ours is still eyewatering on a 100k mortgage. I think I'd rather be broke for a few years and have the baby I wanted.

"I never got the 2nd child I wanted but I did get this nice house" ... not the best thought to have at the end of life really, surely?

seven201 Tue 14-Nov-17 20:11:28

MrsHathaway, you’re scaring me. My daughter costs us £1000 a month in nursery fees alone! How can the baby stage be the cheapest???

Op, doesn’t sound like you can afford it yet. Do you both work full time? How long is your fixed rate for? Our first mortgage with a low loan to value ratio reduced by about £200 a month when we remortgaged, although admittedly the value had gone up quite a lot. I feel for you. Retraining to a higher paid job or moving by to an area with cheaper housing - is that an option at all?

winkletwinkletoes Tue 14-Nov-17 20:11:43

In terms of work I believe it's either 18.5 or 37. It's local authority and I think thats what they allow but not sure. Haven't asked.

In terms of money.. we will earn less for now as partner has taken on a new job as a junior accountant so has to start at the bottom and work up. Eventually I hope grin he will be significantly better off.

I'm at the top of my scale. I could earn more if I got a new job elsewhere but they come up every 6-12 months and that's if I get it. Very sought after round here.

Mortgage will reduce when we re mortgage but due to just taking it out I don't think they would allow interest only. Life is so unfair sad.

MIL keeps nagging about having more but won't offer to look after it even though she doesn't work. angry

TinselTwins Tue 14-Nov-17 20:11:46

Not if the ends don't meet I'm afraid!

troodiedoo Tue 14-Nov-17 20:12:24

We have a similar income and I've just had a second child 8 months ago. I'm not going back to work and we only have one car. It's tight but do able. People have a skewed idea of what essentials are these days.

TinselTwins Tue 14-Nov-17 20:13:42

& agree babies are cheapest. Although I've only got as far as preteen, even so I think it's only going to get more expensive not less.

abbsisspartacus Tue 14-Nov-17 20:14:05

Are you sure you get no benefits? Go on entitled too and input your numbers for one child then for two see if there is a difference

Tipsytopsyturvy Tue 14-Nov-17 20:15:16

Could you do the 18.5 but get any of it on opposite working days to your partner? So you work his days off so that there is always someone when he is at Work. Tax and ni etc would be less.
It is hard I agree currently debating a second myself and I just can’t commit or make a decision based on so many things.

dangermouseisace Tue 14-Nov-17 20:17:09

When I had my 2nd I changed job/career temporarily so that my husband could look after the baby. So I went from fairly well paid work to retail at the weekends, and one evening per week, whilst husband worked normal office hours. It meant that me and my husband (STBXH now) saw each other less, but it made financial sense. I then went back to my career when he was due to get the free nursery hours.

dangermouseisace Tue 14-Nov-17 20:18:30

...and I picked the retail place specifically for the discount, as it was a shop I used a lot! That helped enormously- getting paid to work AND getting a discount on the weekly shop!

Pickleypickles Tue 14-Nov-17 20:20:11

I think if you wanted it enough you would find a way to afford it. Have you looked at all your options? You being a SAHM until the youngest is at school etc. Also you said you DH income should rise in the next few years so stuff will get easier, its not like this is your situation and this is as good as it gets is it, you have achievable goals to improve your circumstances as time goes on.

lovemybabies3 Tue 14-Nov-17 20:20:17

yes double check with the tax credits! me and my husband earn a joint income of 26000! we have 3 children tho and get help paying childcare and breakfast club! and we still got help when had 2 children aswel!

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