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To leave DD upstairs for quiet time?

(37 Posts)
bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:41:05

DD is just over two, stopped napping (her choice) for quite a few months now. I put some music on in her room to listen to, and she just plays in bed/reads her books. Am I mean leaving her up there for 40 mins or so while I eat my lunch and catch up on some tv? I feel mean but she needs time to chill and so do I! Thanks x

endofthelinefinally Tue 14-Nov-17 13:43:15

No not unreasonable.
I am amazed though.
I tried that once.
I hadn't wanted the wall paper stripped in that room.

Thurlow Tue 14-Nov-17 13:43:25

We did this for well over a year. When DD started to drop naps about around 3 we encouraged her to stay in her room for a while - I think we built it up to an hour as she got older. Personally I think it's great for everyone - we all got some peace and quiet and downtime, and it encourages them with independent play.

Yerroblemom1923 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:44:31

Are you sure she's ready To drop her naps....? I kept mine napping right up to starting school (which was a godsend as meant I could either catch up on household chores/start tea or just watch my tv for a couple of hours. (I wouldn't have given up those hours without a fight! Maybe tire her out more at AM playgroups etc....)

Yerroblemom1923 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:46:37

We had a nap time routine , I'd read 2 books at afternoon nap time so she knew it was different to bedtime (4 books)

ineedwine99 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:47:09

Mine's 15m old and we do this, put her in her cot for a nap and sometimes she just doesn't go, will crawl round the cot chattering away to herself for up to 45 mins

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:48:32

Thanks everyone.

She physically will not sleep anymore. She therefore goes to bed at 6pm and wakes up around 7.30-8am so I feel she's getting enough sleep.

She just won't do it anymore! She started off napping still but then not going to sleep until 9-10 (fannying around all night)... and then just dropped it altogether x

Ameliablue Tue 14-Nov-17 13:49:20

As long as she is happy and safe...

Theresamayscough Tue 14-Nov-17 13:49:27

Ha ha op I did this with all my children.

We had room play/cot play every day from 1 till 2.15. They loved it and it was a life saver.

It’s not mean to allow children to develop skills to play by themselves. Go for it.

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:49:46

Even if she does to nursery she won't nap. She goes two morning a week. She went this morning, still wide awake now lol xx and she can go all day quite happy, eats dinner no tantrums etc. Just wanted to know if it was mean leaving her up there alone x

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:50:16

Thanks Theresamayscough, lol love the name x

Theresamayscough Tue 14-Nov-17 13:50:49

Her sleep routine sounds amazing. Lots of kids drop naps around 2 where others nap till 3/4. No hard and fast rules

carameldecaflatte Tue 14-Nov-17 13:51:47


If she's happy and you're happy then it's ok!

My ds(5) napped until he was about 4; sometimes he didn't sleep but just stayed in his room having "quiet time" playing or reading.

Witchend Tue 14-Nov-17 13:52:11

Dd1 used to love her quiet times in the afternoon when she'd dropped her nap. She had a digital clock and I'd write the numbers on a piece of paper when it was over. She used to tell me off if I suggested she came out early. grin
Only thing was when I first did it, she didn't know her numbers, so didn't know if she'd missed it, only when it was exactly that time.

She loved it and would ask for it if I didn't offer it. And as she got older she liked to pick her time to come out. Occasionally she picked a time that was 2 hours or more, and I'd keep on checking on her, but she'd be totally happy and tell me she wanted to stay.
We used to always do something fun when she first came down too.

crunched Tue 14-Nov-17 13:53:18

I did exactly this betty and loads of people MIL SILcriticised me for it, saying it was cruel and lazy. I did question myself but just found both me and my DC were so much more chilled after this time.
My DC, now teens, are all happy in their own company and seem pretty secure. I honestly believe that if you are happy alone this is one of the greatest gifts you can have. I am not stating that is why my DC can cope with independence, uni etc., of course there is much else comes into play, but I certainly don't think it does any harm.

RidiculousDiversion Tue 14-Nov-17 13:53:26

I did this until both my kids went too school (one mostly napped, one largely played from about age 3) - still have an hour's quiet time after lunch in the holidays now! She'll let you know if she's not happy, and she's certainly old enough to play with toys, look at books etc for a while by herself in a safe environment.

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:53:56

Awesome witchend! What did she get up to? Just chatter etc?

I'm pregnant again so feel these quiet times may fall by the wayside when she knows her brother/sister is downstairs with mummy... x

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:55:19

Thanks everyone. We still have her monitor in her room (one that you can move around) so I keep an eye on her to make sure she's not climbing the curtains lol. X

Ausparent Tue 14-Nov-17 13:55:35

Self direction is a valuable skill and you are teaching her.
As long as she is ok I would stick on Netflix and kick back smile

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 13:57:07

Lol ausparent. Had my lunch currently watching This Morning.

Enjoying being a little quiet before DC2 comes along and chaos starts again x

Theresamayscough Tue 14-Nov-17 14:03:19

When newbie gets into a routine maybe you could synchronise naps and quiet play time?

The holy grail! grin

bettydraper31 Tue 14-Nov-17 14:05:54

Haha if only! I'll update in a few months... as I'm rocking back and forth shoving Jaffa cakes into my mouth wondering where it all went wrong.

Theresamayscough Tue 14-Nov-17 14:06:53


Myheartbelongsto Tue 14-Nov-17 14:07:00

IMO that's a bit lazy.

Myheartbelongsto Tue 14-Nov-17 14:07:29

If you feel mean then don't do it

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