I'm genuinely starting this thread because I"m at my wits end and v frightened, not to be goady. But I am aware that it's very very easy to get this wrong.
DM is morbidly obese (approximately 12 stone overweight.) She can now barely walk across the room without getting out of breath. She is in constant pain from her knees and hips. When we see her we have to arrange all our activities around this (we have v active young DC but have to go with her to places with zero walking involved/ a place to sit down immediately etc etc.) She can't really play with her DGC at all as she can't move around/ cant' get down on the floor to do a puzzle with them and certainly cant' take them out etc etc so I feel she misses out on a lot. It seriously affects our relationship in lots of ways.
She does work (in a sedentary job) and her life revolves around this . Her work and how busy she is, is always the reason/ excuse she gives as to why she can't make any lifestyle changes at all.
I am terrified that she is going to die soon and so sad to watch her quality of life be so low. I am also scared (selfishly) that soon she will need full time care, and I am the only one who will be able to provide this. She occasionally says she will go on a diet or whatever, but never does, and just eats more and more.
I have tried everything- staying quiet and saying nothing about it, encouraging her to diet/ offering to do various exercise things with her etc etc and even getting angry and saying that its affecting all of us (I'm not proud of this last one.) Sometimes I do feel angry about it though and it's really hard not to feel this way.
If you are or have ever been obese- can you help me understand why she would be this way? Why she wouldn't even try to make a change? is there anything I can do to help her? I'm all for body positivity etc but I love her and am frightened and would love to know if I can do anything.
Thanks in advance for any advice.
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31 replies
deliverdaniel · 13/11/2017 00:56
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notanurse2017 ·
13/11/2017 12:29
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