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To ask how to sort out my working life?

(16 Posts)
Foreverlexicon Sun 12-Nov-17 22:21:08

I'm only 25 and I feel totally stuck. I'm also probably going to sound like a very immature brat but I'm feeling a bit emotional frazzled so would rather people can be kind (as in I'm on my break at work and holding back tears)

I don't want this to sound wrong but I'm fairly intelligent, I learn very quickly but I have never DONE anything.

For the past 6 years I have worked freelance as a horse groom, working for several different clients a week. I decided around this time last year it was time to move on. I was getting bored of it, I have my own horses and it's not so much fun after I've done other people's all day. It could go no further and I needed to start thinking about pensions and things like that.

I now take calls for the police. I love the work but shift work is not agreeing with me. I thought really long and hard about doing it and I thought I could make it work but I can't. I'm not sleeping, I'm struggling to eat proper meals, I feel constantly unsettled.

I have a brilliant friend who rides 1 of my horses and she has been doing them for me when I can't but I miss them. I work mostly evenings and I miss my partner. I miss having a routine and I feel like I don't have a life. The commute is also costing me more than I realised so after all of it, unless I do a fair amount of overtime, I barely have any money spare.

I mean financially I'm in a better position than I used to be and it's consistent and I have a pension. I enjoy the actual work and I'm pretty good at it - I pick up IT systems very quickly and I'm brilliant under the pressure but I feel like the rest of my life has been swallowed. I also have a long expensive commute which drains me.

But I don't know what else to do. I've never done anything bar horses and this. I have some transferable skills but every job I look at wants experience of doing things I havnt even heard of!

I just don't know what to do. I can't afford to take a huge pay cut which I would really need to do given I have no experience.

I am open to doing some training but it would need to be slow and steady as I don't have much spare time but I just don't know what in!

At the moment I'm considering front end web design - I used to play with this as a teenager so I know a bit and obviously enjoyed it given I did it as a hobby. I've found some great online websites to learn from, including one which eventually (for a fee) gives you 12 real life projects to do to build a portfolio but is that enough to get a job in it? I also feel this will take years and I'm not sure I can do this for years.

I do suffer from anxiety which is mainly triggered by not having enough time which is probably setting this off. I feel a bit like a failure to be honest.

katmarie Sun 12-Nov-17 22:26:00

Look at online study options like which have loads of free online short courses you can do. It will allow you to dabble in a few things and see what you’re good at/enjoy for no cost.

ElizaBenson Sun 12-Nov-17 22:52:07

Where are you based? If you have contact centre experience there tend to be ones out there with better hours

Foreverlexicon Sun 12-Nov-17 23:06:15

Thanks I will check out that website.

Eliza - do you mean different forces? I'm not sure I fancy a different kind of call centre - I'm actually really not a people person, I enjoy this because it really MATTERS and it's so interesting but I'm not sure I'd be keen on doing it for something less important if that makes sense.

ElizaBenson Sun 12-Nov-17 23:18:01

Maybe different forces, or I was thinking of things like RAC centres where people call for breakdowns or companies associated with the poluce like narpo (national association of retired police officers) things like that

redexpat Sun 12-Nov-17 23:20:05

So what you want from a job is
- regular normal office hours
- somewhere close to home. (Working from home?)
- working with IT systems
- minimal contact with people

Anything else you can think of?

pandarific Sun 12-Nov-17 23:20:22

Have a look around at other roles within the police force - a lot of places like to hire candidates from within, as they know you can perform, basically. Yes you'd still have a commute, but you'd have a better role you could then move on from after a bit to work closer to home?

chockaholic72 Sun 12-Nov-17 23:28:01

You aren't a failure or immature at all. If anything you're being sensible by recognising that it's a problem and are trying to fix it. My niece worked for the ambulance service for a few months as a call handler but couldn't stick it out due to the shift work. It isn't for everyone, and long term it can have detrimental effects on your health.

My niece used her annual leave to upskill her MS Office knowledge at Reed, temped in offices, and then got an entry level admin position in HR at her local hospital and is working her way up. It takes baby steps to get started, but every bit of experience helps.

Pixiedust2017 Sun 12-Nov-17 23:30:58

I am working towards changing careers into software development at the moment. There are loads of free resources for you to use to get experience creating projects. You can then upload them to github to make a portfolio for yourself.

Here are some examples;

It is enough to get a job in it.
My partner took 3 months off work to self teach and changed careers into software within 12 months which he has now been in for over 2 years.
If you'd like any more info feel free to PM. smile

Foreverlexicon Sun 12-Nov-17 23:57:53

Pixiedust - that gives me a lot of hope! At least if I feel I'm making progress I don't feel like I'm treading water so much.

That's my other issue with sticking it out in this job - it's never going to go anywhere further, there is no progression. I applied because I wanted to join as a police officer but failed the medical so had to bid my time for a couple of years and I felt this would be good experience. Since then I've realised how much we go out single crew which I just don't feel comfortable with and obviously still shifts.

I would LOVE to work from home. Don't get me wrong I don't mind people, I enjoy working with people around but I think I'd prefer to not talk all day.

I think part of the issue is I just don't really understand the various job roles so it's hard to think oh yeah I could do that, if that makes sense?

Thanks for the suggestion to check out internal jobs - just seen a vacancy for something I can do based in my home town - slight pay cut but it's about 10 minutes walk from my house so really it's a pay rise. I think I have enoug skills to apply and if I did get it then the skills I would learn doing that can be applied for all sorts of jobs so thank you for the reminder!

K1092902 Mon 13-Nov-17 01:50:09

Place marking

BeerBaby Mon 13-Nov-17 03:24:15

If you want to do a job that matters consider something on safeguarding. Charity sector.

I used to work night shifts and it made me.miserable. my whole system reacted badly to it

CountryGirl1985 Mon 13-Nov-17 07:59:32

Definitely apply for the one you've seen as the police do like to promote from within. If that doesn't work out as I see it you have a couple of different options that are more obvious than a total career change,
1. Speak to your line manager. You should be having regular 1-1 meetings and an annual personal development review. Ask them for some project work, show you're keen. You do have to be persistent but keep at it and doors will start to open.
2. What about using some of your Equine skills/experience? There are many paths open nowadays that we never used to even know about. If you wanted an employed role I can vouch that Equine veterinary nursing is fantastic- very different day to day, and although you will do your share of the on-call rota this is much less than the pattern of shift work. If you are looking for even more flexibility what about training in Equine sports massage, physiotherapy or McTimoney?

Skittlesss Mon 13-Nov-17 08:03:26

I work for the Police too and have found that a lot of people don't tend to stay in the CCC for very long - they use it as a way to get "in". Why not look at other roles within the force? I work in the prosecution side of things - we are agile workers so only go into the office one day a week. Also, our role is very interesting which you might like and we do make a difference. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat more.

Lilonetwothree Mon 13-Nov-17 08:07:00

Have you thought about being a vet nurse?

IamtheDevilsAvocado Mon 13-Nov-17 08:26:11

Work in equine insurance?

Would also look at careers books, some are brilliant and can nail down some of the issues that you raise... Re abilities and job fit and personality type and job type.

What colour is my parachute I seem to recall was useful.

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