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To ask what to get stbxh for his birthday

(16 Posts)
TartWithTheCart35 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:25:02

It's his 40th in a couple of weeks and I haven't a clue what to do?

We've only just started the divorce and still get on well but I don't know what to do for his birthday? Should I get anything or just something from the DC?

I know we need all the money for sol but at the same time it's a big birthday.

CherryChasingDotMuncher Wed 08-Nov-17 22:27:39

I’d just get something from the kids TBH.

With respect - you know him best so surely you have more of a clue than randoms on the Internet?

How old are your kids? Could you ask them what they want to get him?

TartWithTheCart35 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:33:35

I was just asking advise if I should buy him something or just from the DC? Not on what to get him!

TartWithTheCart35 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:35:51

Sorry yes that's what the title says. Long day.

Aperolspritzer123 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:36:37

For my birthday my stbx got me a present from the kids only - a bottle of prosecco and some chocolates - it was fine. It's his 40th too in a few weeks and I'm going to get him a bottle of whisky from them and a card. I wouldn't get him a present from me - I think it blurs the boundaries a bit.

RedTitsMcGinty Wed 08-Nov-17 22:45:19

I let 7yo DD choose a charity gift for ExDH. She chose a wormery! grin

TartWithTheCart35 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:45:35

Probably best just something from the kids then and a card from me. Awkward really.

I guess the same for Christmas as well.

fusspot66 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:48:20

I find gift buying awkward too. Can't get anything too personal or intimate. That leaves red wine and chocolate!

TartWithTheCart35 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:52:22

He doesn't really drink so it's not as if I could get him a bottle of something. And obviously don't want to get him anything intimate.

Maybe I could buy him a packet of condoms for all the shagging around I'm sure he will be doing soon 😁

fusspot66 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:52:37

Remember, you're teaching the kidsame the importance of thinking of others and celebrating their birthday enthusiastically. As an aside, I spotted my 7 ye old DS not singing happy birthday at a party this WE. He's not keen on other people having a birthday. He's a work in progress.

fusspot66 Wed 08-Nov-17 22:54:40

Last Xmas mine got a heavy bottomed frying pan and the kids wrote out pancake making instructions so he can make the sunday pancakes EOW.

DailyMailDontStealMyThread Wed 08-Nov-17 23:09:32

Nothing from you.

How old are the DC?

Take them shopping with a budget and remind them that wrapping paper and card (if they are not making one) comes out of the budget. Let them choose.

confusedlittleone Thu 09-Nov-17 06:07:41

I wouldn't do anything. Him/his family can sort out the dc it isn't your chore anymore

Phillipa12 Thu 09-Nov-17 06:17:11

I let the children choose their dads, my exs presents. He got a milk jug last year! I do agree with a pp in the fact that his family/him should be sorting this out with the dc, my sisters certainly do for me, but it just wouldnt have occurred for my ex to do this and i only do it otherwise the dc would be very upset.

Mrswinkler Thu 09-Nov-17 06:29:09

If you are getting on ok buy him something. It’s a special Birthday, why not?

NotSureIfiAmWell Thu 09-Nov-17 06:31:53

Will be our first Christmas separated. I will get him a gift from the boys. I will not get OW a gift. Likewise he will now have to sort out his family too as l used to do it.

He has surprised me though as he asked what l wanted from the boys for Christmas. I didn't expect to be on his radar as he is so loved up currently.

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