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To ask someone to get something from the shop for me...

(71 Posts)
FavouriteElephantTeddy Mon 06-Nov-17 18:15:47

...when they're going anyway?

Because my DM seems to think I am.

I don't drive and the only nappies that properly fit DD (2.4) without leaking are Tesco. I can get on the bus to go there, and if it's an absolute emergency I have done in the past but DM goes there every single week. I only ask her once a month or so to get 3 packs for £10 of nappies, I always pay the money when I go and get the nappies, and if she says she needs the money before hand I'd happily transfer the money to her bank online.

It's not going out of her way as she'd be at Tesco anyway, and I don't expect her to drop them at mine as that would mean driving past her house to get to mine, I always either pick them up when I do the my weekly shop at the Aldi basically opposite her house, or if we're meeting up anyway I ask her to bring them too me. We see each other at least twice a week and she picks DD up from Nursery once a fortnight as she likes to have alone time with my DD so it's not like they're hanging around her house for days on end.

My DM says it's too much, and I need to start getting my own nappies. The only thing I tend to buy in Tesco is nappies as I prefer Aldi and/or Morrisons which we have in our hometown within walking distance - I've tried both Aldi and Morrisons nappies before anyone mentions them, they don't fit DD properly and leak, so I use Tesco.

So AIBU to ask her? Or do I just need to start factoring a monthly trip to Tesco on the bus no way am I trying to get a weekly shop back on the bus with DD on my own! into my budget? My DM doesn't have a small car btw, a hyundai i30 and it's just her and two cats at home she's shopping for weekly so it's not like there's no room in the car for 3 packs of nappies.

RavingRoo Mon 06-Nov-17 18:17:30

Why don’t you drive?

Furgggggg12 Mon 06-Nov-17 18:17:46

YANBU. How petty of her.

UpOnDown Mon 06-Nov-17 18:18:16

Could you order enough nappies every few months to do an online order?

hesterton Mon 06-Nov-17 18:19:00

How odd. I would imagine most mum's would do this like a shot for their daughters - it hardly puts her out. But she does have a right to say no so I guess all you can do is shrug your shoulder in a bewildered fashion and get on without her. Shame though when she has a car and could easily help you.

hesterton Mon 06-Nov-17 18:19:27

Mums not mum's - oops

Allthewaves Mon 06-Nov-17 18:19:47

Unless there is a back story, then I don't see the issue if she's going anyway and you give her the money before

StepAwayFromCake Mon 06-Nov-17 18:19:53

YANBU

She is being rediculous.

Lethaldrizzle Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:03

She probably doesn't want to set a precedent

onalongsabbatical Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:09

Your own mother won't pick up nappies for you when she's going anyway? That sounds bloody mean, to me.
But if you can't argue it out with her without it causing upset, is there any way you could order them online and have them delivered?
Sorry she's not being supportive over this. flowers

FavouriteElephantTeddy Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:26

Raving Because I am struggling with lessons atm, I'm dyspraxic so muddle my gears up and I have no-one to take me out to practice between lessons as the only drivers in my family are DM and FIL neither of whom want to take me out.

Up Possibly could do it online every few months, would have to look at what the minimum spend would be.

MyBrilliantDisguise Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:46

Why don’t you drive?

What a useful comment.

StepAwayFromCake Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:53

Could you do an online shop, mostly nappies?

OuchBollocks Mon 06-Nov-17 18:20:59

Sod her. Could you get them delivered along with some bits for the freezer? Some slots are only £1.50, cheaper than the bus.

Justbookedasummmerholiday Mon 06-Nov-17 18:21:06

Wow what a lovely dm /gm she is.
Not.
Call me petty but I would be giving her a wide berth.

GrowThroughWhatYouGoThrough Mon 06-Nov-17 18:21:06

I think she’s being ridiculous personally I’d just do an online shop for them in bulk, the delivery will cost less than the bus probably

StatueInTheSky Mon 06-Nov-17 18:21:07

they will surely deliver?

Glumglowworm Mon 06-Nov-17 18:21:38

It does seem petty but people are perfectly entitled to refuse to do someone a favour.

Rather than make the trip, you could order a months supply online, the delivery charge is often cheaper than bus fare and it's certainly far easier.

IHaveBrilloHair Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:02

Absolutely fine to ask, but since she's being about it, why not order online?

FavouriteElephantTeddy Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:02

No back story only that she has always favored my DBro over me but it's not really affected our adult life because I hardly ask her to help me apart from this she's the one who insists she must have DD alone once a fortnight

OuchBollocks Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:12

I think the minimum for tesco is £40, easy enough to do with 2 months worth of nappies and some tesco value bits.

MissionItsPossible Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:13

Pretty selfish but everyone has the right to say no to things they don't want to do (still bloody selfish of her though, I could understand if you never paid her or asked her every other day)

IHaveBrilloHair Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:42

*being weird about it that should have said.

Lordasriel Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:45

Minimum online order is £40.

OuchBollocks Mon 06-Nov-17 18:22:49

That's about a million votes for delivery grin

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