Who was bu?

[Neoflex]

Today was at a couples birthing course. Paid privately, 2 days. 12 couples and two single women who then paired up.
Of the 12 couples was a lesbian couple (one pregnant and her partner). The partner complained pretty early on in the course because the midwife referred to the "dads" She requested that only birthing partner be used in the course because she felt excluded.
The midwife explained that the course was a couples course and the dads are the fathers of the children and they should feel more than just birthing partners. That they shouldn't feel excluded either.
The midwife continued to use dads for the whole day.
The lesbian partner spent the whole day huffing and rolling her eyes.
Her pregnant partner looked pretty overwhelmed by the whole experience.
Who was being unreasonable?

[Inkandbone]

The midwife.

[MrTrebus]

She was BU and the midwife was right but you'll get a load of people saying for the sake of political correctness she should have used some ridiculous phrase each time instead of Dad.

[ButchyRestingFace]

Why couldn't the midwife just have referred to "the other parent"?

[Slartybartfast]

Sounds like they should have respected lesbian woman wish but they should have changed their wording

[ILoveMillhousesDad]

Could she not have just said partners

[buckeejit]

The midwife, VVU

[Slartybartfast]

The midwife was unreasonable

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

I actually think that the instructor was. By using dads she excluded a number of people there. Using birthing partner would have meant all are included.
Why are the soon to be dads now important than the soon to be mum?

[Inkandbone]

As a lesbian couple there are many "ordinary" things you are excluded from.

A pregnant woman won't necessarily have the father of her child by her side as she gives birth. Some women are single. Some elicit to have their mum or a friend.

[BatteredBreadedOrSouthernFried]

The midwife was obviously UR and being deliberately hurtful when they could easily have said partner after being told that someone was feeling excluded. It’s called being a nice person.

[Inkandbone]

Actually, why were single women paying for a couple course?

[MissMooMoo]

Why couldnt she say 'dads and partners'?

[EB123]

The midwife. She should just say partner.

[NC4now]

Partners would have been more appropriate. The MW was BU.

[ShapelyBingoWing]

I think it's weird that the midwife didn't use 'partners' anyway given two single mums had paired up too.

[greendale17]

The woman was BU

Am sick of this political correctness rubbish. It takes a man and a woman to make a baby.

[BenLui]

5 Dads and one female partner and the midwife thought the men would feel excluded?

I would have thought the midwife could have dealt much better with that, it can’t be the first time it’s come up.

[Inkandbone]

Not to deliver it, though greendale

[BenLui]

greendale but they weren’t learning how to make babies in the class. They were learning how to give birth.

[ijustwannadance]

Partner would've been fine.

[BatteredBreadedOrSouthernFried]

It takes a man and a woman to make a baby.

It wasn’t a conception course.

[Athome77]

I have taught birth classes and always used birth partners as several women had friends or mums or new partner- male who wasn’t dad with them. On one course I had the woman, bio dad and woman’s new boyfriend, birth partner was just much easier.

[BabyDreams2018]

The Woman from the couple was being Unreasonable. The MW could have said Dad or Birthing Partner each time but it is a bit long winded to spend the day doing that.

[NoSquirrels]

Midwife 100% unreasonable, even by her own logic she was homophobic towards the lesbian parent-to-be.

[KatharinaRosalie]

The midwife explained that the course was a couples course

way to make those 2 single women welcome..