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AIBU to expect nursery to get on with it?

(134 Posts)
Adelina15 Tue 31-Oct-17 08:12:14

DD, age 2.5 attends a full time day nursery. Last week we were on holiday in U.S., came home on Sunday. On Monday we slept in (probably jetlagged, exhausted aftrr the travelling etc) and we didnt get DD dropped off until 11.40am. Staff asked if she needed a lunch- hmm yes- it was 11.40am- presumed lunch was at least after 12.

On collecting her staff 'had a word' about phoning in if she was going to be late so they could keep her a lunch. Explained that we had slept in but I would endevour to do this in future. Again when I dropped her off this morning the manager reinforced that we should phone if late, but then threw in about the days she visits her grandparents.

Once every 6-8 weeks DD spends a day with her grandparents. Nursery are always told 2-3 days in advance that DD will be having a day off. This has never been an issue.

AIBU to think I pay enough for her nursery place, which is over the odds locally, to not listen crap like that? Shes been going for 2 years without issue. AIBU to be pissed off?

RaptorsCantPlayPoker Tue 31-Oct-17 08:14:08

Yes you are.

It’s just good manners to let them know she will be coming in very late otherwise how do they know to save her food? Do you expect them to prepare or save her a meal on the off chance you bring her in a couple of hours late?

monkeywithacowface Tue 31-Oct-17 08:16:14

Yes you sound very arrogant. It is simple courtesy to keep people informed if your daughter will be attending or not so they can plan. Manners cost nothing.

buntingqueen Tue 31-Oct-17 08:16:23

If I were to drop my DC off at 11.40, their nursery would say something too, as they would have presumed they weren’t going in that day. That is quite late if you haven’t let them know. Lunches are made based on how many children are present in the morning, not at 11.40.

Lules Tue 31-Oct-17 08:16:52

Why wouldn't you phone? I don't see why you wouldn't. Easy enough to do

KadabrasSpoon Tue 31-Oct-17 08:18:04

Yes you should let them know if she's going to miss the entire morning. I know ours plan staff numbers around the number of children and meal plan.

I can't see the problem with her staying with her grandparents if you've given them advance warning though.

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower Tue 31-Oct-17 08:19:21

As she was late they probably assumed she wasn't going to be in, and hadn't prepared a lunch for her.

Our nursery asks us to let them know scheduled days off so they can make sure they've got enough food and to minimise wastage.


laurzj82 Tue 31-Oct-17 08:19:48

Yes sorry I think YABU. They will need to tell the kitchen how many dinners they will need. Don't see the issue with the grandparents though if they know in advance confused

Caulk Tue 31-Oct-17 08:19:56

I assume with lunches they have to order them/prepare them earlier than 20mins before eating them and therefore they need to know if she is eating or not. I’m also yet to be at a nursery that hasn’t begun the lunch routine by 11:40!

Alicetherabbit Tue 31-Oct-17 08:20:09

They shouldn't have said anything if it's a one off and late in, am sure the chef can put a sarnie together.
Yanbu regarding notice when she's at grandparents if you pay for the place then it should be open to you. My nursery have asked this so they can arrange staff time off, but my thoughts are the nursery days are for my convenience if I'm paying and I need childcare her space should be there.

putdownyourphone Tue 31-Oct-17 08:22:17

Lunch at our nursery is 11. I think saying they should just get on with it is a little harsh, it's good manners to tell them you'll be late

Adelina15 Tue 31-Oct-17 08:23:32

We woke up 20mins before she arrived at nursery. I think they should have expected her for her lunch, given that we hadnt notified them otherwise.

confusedlittleone Tue 31-Oct-17 08:23:34

Lunch at our nursery is also around 11:30, old nursery was 11.. most nurserys have lunch before 12, but you should also be aware of their routine??

Witsender Tue 31-Oct-17 08:25:33

Of course YANBU. That late they will have assumed she wasn't coming. Why would they expect her when she was that late?

fucksakefay Tue 31-Oct-17 08:25:50

It's fair enough to assume that if seems not there in the morning they don't need to prepare her a lunch! I'd have phoned when I woke up to check it was still ok to bring her in
Just don't let it bother you though, they presumably found her a lunch, just say oh sorry didn't realise you need to know first thing about lunches. Now you know.

The days off to visit grandparents is a bit odd they are weird about it unless you receive funding which can be jeopardised by regular days off

Fluffyears Tue 31-Oct-17 08:26:16

Phoning would have taken you five minutes and the nursery would have been able to sort everything out. Turning up late without a word is just rude.

PatriciaHolm Tue 31-Oct-17 08:26:51

Why would they prepare a lunch for an absent child?

DewDropsonKittens Tue 31-Oct-17 08:27:41


If she is not going to be in you should be making them aware.
It could be they book temp staff to cover ratio, then if you don't show up for the AM session they will be paying for no reason.

It's courtesy more than anything

Appuskidu Tue 31-Oct-17 08:28:33

We woke up 20mins before she arrived at nursery. I think they should have expected her for her lunch, given that we hadnt notified them otherwise.

They will not have expected her for lunch, no!

InDubiousBattle Tue 31-Oct-17 08:28:41

YABU, they probably took her absence to mean, well, she was absent and therefore not need lunch. Getting several children ready for lunch in a nursery setting takes longer than getting one ready at home and every nursery I know of would have started the routine at 11.30.

RolyRocks Tue 31-Oct-17 08:29:43

My 2.5 year old DD has lunch at nursery at 11:30 so yes, in that respect, YABU to assume yours doesn't.

In addition, although it was a genuine mistake to lie in, the nursery still need to know where your DC is, if they are expecting them in case something has happened, so they are perfectly reasonable to ask you in the future, based on this incident, to let them know.

You seem to be far too offended by a reasonable request for needing lunch and another reasonable request to let them know if you are late.

Youshallnotpass Tue 31-Oct-17 08:31:03

Quite frankly beings so late I think you are lucky they accepted her at all for that day! considering ratios etc.


Wightintheghoulies Tue 31-Oct-17 08:32:47

YABU. The nursery isn't psychic, they had no idea that you had decided that your daughter was coming in late rather than not at all. If you are expected anywhere at a certain time and know you'll be late or not coming, you always ring. This is very basic stuff, why do you think you are a special case?

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower Tue 31-Oct-17 08:34:51

So they're mindreaders now?

Adelina15 Tue 31-Oct-17 08:37:10

"Lucky they accepted her at all"??? I pay huge fees for her to have a full day place 5 days week. Its not good luck that they provide the service.

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