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(101 Posts)

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PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 00:40:55

I've just found out that my sister inlaw pays for everything in their household, including my brother's mortgage.
Background is that she put 50% down and my brother took a mortgage after his deposit. Sister in law is now paying HIS mortgage, all bills and doing the housework when she gets home. How the fuck is this fair?

Namechangetempissue Sat 28-Oct-17 00:42:11

It's not, but it's none of your business.

Insomnibrat Sat 28-Oct-17 00:43:36

I would respectfully suggest that the way in which they arrange their household finances is their own private business.

PurpleDaisies Sat 28-Oct-17 00:44:00

It doesn’t sound fair but there may be other factors in play that you don’t know about.

Who told you all this?

PurpleDaisies Sat 28-Oct-17 00:44:18

And it isn’t really your business anyway.

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 00:52:46

She's upset and complaining to me

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 00:54:15

Purple... both my sis in law and then my brother

PurpleDaisies Sat 28-Oct-17 00:57:12

If you’ve talked to your brother about it, how does he justify the situation?

To be honest, you’re best not getting involved. No good can come of getting between and arguing couple, especially if you’re related to one of them.

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:00:55

He just says pretty much "meh". I understand the not getting involved but I'm so angry for her. My brother is amazing to me but I don't get why he thinks this is remotely acceptable

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:04:06

It's not fair. What can you do? Fuck all.

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:05:50

Is he working/earning/minding the children? What does he spend his money on (assuming he has an income)?

Aquamarine1029 Sat 28-Oct-17 01:06:00

This situation is like a minefield in the middle of a forest fire. It is clear that you care for your SIL, but you need to stop her from complaining about her marriage to your brother to you. It is an impossible situation.

DarthMaiden Sat 28-Oct-17 01:10:33

I’m not sure why you want to get involved in this?

Unless you feel SIL has been coerced into this situation....

They are married adults and it strikes me they’d be a damn site better talking about this to each other rather than you.

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:11:55

Sorry I don't know how to tag people. Yes. He is earning. When he wasn't I get that she stepped up. Now he is. She is saying he needs to set up a direct debit but he says she needs to ask for money

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:16:06

And they are bringing this to you why?

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:19:13

It was a chat and I honestly thought it was massively unfair on my sister in law. Just wondered whether he was unfair

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:21:38

We can see what you're doing here Jack. Not that dumb.

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:23:16

Amazing how many men are attracted to this site.

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:23:41

Sorry, what am I doing?

hiddley Sat 28-Oct-17 01:27:46

Perhaps you are not giving us the full story OP.

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:34:55

Honestly. We had a chat. She has said in the past that she feels everything falls on her. I just didn't realise how much. Love my brother to death but I really think he's being unfair off loading everything onto sis in law . Kind of wanted her to know she wasn't being an arse

Happyemoji Sat 28-Oct-17 01:44:13

Is she on the mortgage?

PostcodeJack Sat 28-Oct-17 01:49:37

I'm guessing she has to be since the house is joint names. Which is why she'll pay because they lose house if it is not paid

PyongyangKipperbang Sat 28-Oct-17 01:50:40

I suggest you aquaint her with the phrase "Cocklodger" and a fucking good divorce lawyer.

PyongyangKipperbang Sat 28-Oct-17 01:53:48

Just read it to DH and he is disgusted with your DB and said that he should be ashamed of himself. He also agreed that your SIL should bin him off.

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