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Is it possible to be calm but still in control of my life??

(7 Posts)
Pariswhenitdrizzles Thu 26-Oct-17 23:51:03

Pretty much as it says in the title. I haven't really explained myself very well.

Basically, I'm such a massive bloody stress-pot. But I seem to know (or come across) so many people who work incredibly hard and are very successful but still manage to be extremely calm and cool-headed. I'd love to be like them i.e. to go with the flow but also feel in control at the same time. How can I do this? Is there a way? Is it even possible??

Anecdoche Thu 26-Oct-17 23:56:59

do you really feel in control when you are stressing and not calm?
i ask because that is when i feel least in control of my life!

everyone is different but for me being logical and taking time to think rather than reacting helps.

also asking whats the worst that could happen

because mostly its never that bad and nothing you cant cope with.

planning is key imo. the more you plan and prepare the less out of control you feel and the less stressed you get.

and a bit of fuck it 😁 a lot of stuff doesnt actually matter as much as you think it does.

Pariswhenitdrizzles Fri 27-Oct-17 00:00:03

Thanks anecdoche smile I'm so sorry - I've just realised thatI phrased my OP really badly blush

I think what I meant to ask was: AIBU to ask how people who have lots of responsibility and lots of things to do stay calm and in control?

Flomper Fri 27-Oct-17 00:03:04

This has really reaonated with me OP. I am also normally stressed/anxious running round at a million miles an hour. I come across and am regularly described as "in control", "very clever", "i dont know how she does it" etc etc but I feel sick with stress and anxiety most of the time and cant relax.

However, when I occasionally do and take my foot off the pedal, everything seems to go to shit and i cant keep all the plates spinning (company, kids, house, friendships etc)

I dont know what the answer is.

Pariswhenitdrizzles Fri 27-Oct-17 00:13:00

Flomper flowers I felt exactly like that today. I had loads of appointments on to get to, loads of things on and felt sooo stressed. I felt like I was spinning loads of plates, and they were all starting to drop!! sad

I am in awe of anyone who looks calm and collected but who has loads going on.

Whenever I feel stressed (which is most of the time!) I just clam up and get really irritable, teary and anxious as fuck!!! And to top it all off, I'm boring to talk to, because all I can think about is whatever is stressing me out, so I make shite converation(!!!)

Anecdoche Fri 27-Oct-17 00:29:47

sorry. 😁 my mistake.
i took calm but still in control to mean you feel in control currently and want to know how to feel that way while calm. i did think it was a bit weird tbh 😁 sorry.

i would have just suggested the same things even if i hadnt misunderstood. its about not letting yourself get overwhelmed. being organised day to day with practical stuff and giving yourself thinking room are important.

Pariswhenitdrizzles Fri 27-Oct-17 07:26:51

Thanks anecdoche smile

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