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What would you do - mum not answering telephone

(16 Posts)
shouldnthavesaid Thu 26-Oct-17 23:12:31

I'm going out of my mind. This has happened before.

She's got a seizure disorder and I know she's taken a couple tonight and sometimes she's very drowsy afterwards.

A neighbour who was round with her said she'd had a seizure, neighbour had helped her , phoned 999 as she was worried, and ambo/carers came out and checked mum over. Carers and neighbours left at 10 saying mum was sleeping on the couch. Neighbours said they'd pop back first thing.

My sister is severely autistic and won't sleep until she has spoken to her. Sister can't go to her as lives in residential care.

Her brother has spoken to me, says he can't go as has had a drink.

I'm 150 miles away and no trains or buses until 4am. I'm already booked on one as soon as my lecture finishes at 12 noon (pre planned).

I've phoned her carers, asked if they can go round as shes not answering the phone and I don't feel its safe her having had a seizure and now alone (my fault for moving out I think).

Anything could have happened, maybe she fell downstairs, maybe she's been sick, or poorly? Most likely she is just in a v deep sleep but I don't know and I can't know until I've spoken to her sad

My fault for moving so far away isnt it sad

LindyHemming Thu 26-Oct-17 23:14:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StaplesCorner Thu 26-Oct-17 23:14:55

Call the police and ask for a welfare check? Or will the carers call tonight? I don't see how any of it is your fault?

GymBunnieWannabe Thu 26-Oct-17 23:15:26

Can neighbour go back round?

Must be incredibly stressful for you sad

SD1978 Thu 26-Oct-17 23:15:32

Can the careers go round there? If not get the police to do a welfare check. It’s nit your fault- it’s hard when we have to care for family members, but you deserve a life too- there is other family there- your brother and professionals with the carers. It’s natural to feel guilty, but you’ve tried to keep her safe, and either the carers or the police will check on her xx

GymBunnieWannabe Thu 26-Oct-17 23:16:01

Of course it's not your fault but I know what the guilt feels like x

Chocolatear Thu 26-Oct-17 23:16:21

Definitely call the police. I'm sure they will be able to go and check on her.

lalalalyra Thu 26-Oct-17 23:16:54

It's not your fault, not at all.

Can't your brother get a cab?

Do you have a number for a neighbour? I wouldn't mind someone calling me and asking me to pop round in that situation.

It's definately not your fault though.

Seti Thu 26-Oct-17 23:19:11

Sweetheart, the only thing I know for sure us that it's not your fault. Call the police and ask for a welfare check x

MsPavlichenko Thu 26-Oct-17 23:19:40

No, it's not your fault.

Will the carers go round tonight? If not, can you call the neighbour and ask them to pop round again? I would. Hope you hear soon.

Seti Thu 26-Oct-17 23:20:32

(She'll be in a deep sleep I think after the seizure )

Aeroflotgirl Thu 26-Oct-17 23:22:14

Phone tge Police and explain things, ask for a welfare check.

shouldnthavesaid Thu 26-Oct-17 23:22:24

She's answered the phone - very post ictal and muddled. Have managed to direct her to phone her alarm again to make sure someone does come out. Yes her brother could have easily got a taxi.. Don't know why he wouldn't to be honest. V difficult situation. I've got a number for 3 neighbours but not sure they'd be happy to go round this late.. her mum lives just 5 mins away but wouldnt go either (alcoholism).

Ffswtf Thu 26-Oct-17 23:24:21

Firstly I just wanted to say please don't beat yourself up over moving away. I'm sure you're mum would want you to be happy and living a fulfilling life. It sounds as though she has a support network around her and it's most likely she is in a deep sleep recovering from a number of seizures. My mum had epilepsy so I understand where you're coming from. I stayed at home to study because it was just the two of us and I was too scared to leave her. However I do sometimes regret it now, and wonder how different my life could have been. My being at home didn't change the number of seizures she had or any accidents she had either. I couldn't be with her every minute of every day, and she wouldn't have wanted me to. Please try not to worry too much, I appreciate it's tough, love and hugs to you and your mum flowersbrewcakewine

rainbowstardrops Thu 26-Oct-17 23:25:05

It’s definitely not your fault!
Could her brother not get a cab if he’s been drinking but is close by or is there anyone else that could go round?
If not then I’d call the police I think. Better safe than sorry

ohtheholidays Thu 26-Oct-17 23:53:12

Give the Police a ring OP honestly they will not mind they'd rather go and check and everything was okay than not get the call and someone needed they're help.

Please don't beat yourself up over this,this is not your fault and you obviously love your Mum very much.I hope she's okay and that you manage to get some sleep flowers

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