Fuming.

[user1498205994]

So my OHs sister lives in a top floor flat and in no way has ever shown to like animals. When she comes to my house she is skittish about my cat. She has an 2 year old daughter.

So to my surprise two days ago she goes out and buys a dog... anyway the dog seems lovely but today she announces she can't keep it. So I have a large garden, fields opposite my house and I offer to buy the dog from her - that way she can still see the dog and my children get a lifelong friend (we've been thinking about getting a dog for a while)

So it's all arranged, she'll drop the dog off later this afternoon. Then she texts me saying she needs to spend one more night with the dog to let her daughter down gently... ok ... baring in mind I have told my kids the dog is coming today & they're excited.. but fine, no big deal.

She then tells me the dogs been bathed and ready to go tomorrow so I ask what time she'll be over .... no reply for an hour and then I get a text saying she isn't giving the dog she now wants to keep it!?

Then after she realises I'm totally annoyed, the kids are upset and deflated she then tells me that "ah but it is a lovely breed if you do want a dog" ...

I have sent some very angry texts. But seriously am I in the wrong here!?

[Slightlyperturbedowlagain]

If you want a dog why not just get a different dog?

[NancyDonahue]

Poor dog . It sounds like she likes the idea of a dog, but the reality may be a bit different.

[PinkHeart5914]

How cruel of her to buy a dog and then try to toss it aside, it makes me so angry when people behave with animals like that why are people to stupid to think of what having an animal is like?

It doesn’t sound like she wants the poor dog but maybe is to weak to tell a 2 year old that it’s going, like a 2 year old is even going to notice when they’ve had the dog not even 5 minutes.

Yanbu to be annoyed and I hope you do get the poor dog at least you hopefully can offer a home where the poor thing is wanted

[RhiWrites]

You'll get the dog before the end of the year. Just manage expectations with the kids. "We hope dog will be coming to live with us, but we don't know for sure."

[Tilapia]

I think ‘fuming’ is a bit OTT. She’s obviously v fond of the dog and is struggling to give it up.

[RadioGaGoo]

Frustrating behaviour from your OH's sister. It's not fair to raise your families expectations like that.

[user1498205994]

Sorry I should add The dog is 15 months old & has already been given up once (2 days ago) its house trained also which is perfect for us as we have a young family and would prefer to give a dog who needs a home a loving family.

It's the messing us around and knowing full well the dog will be given to someone else who might decide they don't want it either... really frustrating!

Baring in mind also we had been sitting around waiting since 10 this morning... I asked numerous times this morning "are you sure you want to give him up?" And each time she said yes so I told my kids we was getting a dog. Even offered to go out and buy her two year old a present for when she gets here and say "oh thank you for looking after our dog for us!" So it was easier on her child?

[TitaniasCloset]

Yanbu. She sounds flaky.

[Percephone]

Sit tight. Dog will be coming your way sooner or later.

[Crispbutty]

Poor dog. Why was it given away the first Time?

[MissionItsPossible]

I understand the frustration, however, if you knew your sister was flaky and not very good around animals it was a bit presumptuous of you to tell your children you were getting a dog that was just bought by somebody else two days ago.

[OldWitch00]

the first few days with a new dog or puppy are hard, it was very nice of you to offer but you should have expected that she indeed might fall in love with the dog.
you actually were a bit unreasonable and quick to jump on this, better to have done a watchful wait and keep the offer open.

[Insomnibrat]

I agree, the shine will soon wear off and you'll be offered said pooch again. I'd be angry too, a horrible attitude to have towards and animal.

[BoomBoomBoomBoooom]

Both of you are BU deciding to get a dog on a complete whim.

[FangsAlot]

Bide your time, the dog will be yours when she gets fed up of it, again

[AutumnalLeaves38]

OP,

What Crisp posted:
"Poor dog. Why was it given away the first Time? "

I'm confused: you say she, who "in no way has ever shown to like animals...", went out and bought a 15 month old dog.
(Impulse buying a living, breathing, animal: always such a bright move. FFS).

Very strange that someone was apparently prepared to sell their 15 month old dog. (And any dog re-homing rescue shelters can spot unsuitable adopters at 50 paces, and home visit etc., so it couldn't have been via that route).

Most people having no choice but to give up a beloved dog in difficult circumstances would also certainly be triple-checking it was going to the right person, right home.

Hope things are sorted in the dog's best interests, instead of her treating it like a convenient-then-inconvenient-after-2-days-now-mysteriously-convenient-again novelty.
Does she have form for trying to mess you around?

[KimmySchmidt1]

No you are not being unreasonable she sounds like an irresponsible flightly twat. But i always send my DH in to bat if his family are being arseholes - I try to make him responsible for them rather than taking them on myself. have you asked him to discuss with her whether she is really being an adult about this issue and whether she can really look after the dog properly?

the number of absolutely idiotic selfish numpties who now seem to think its ok to get a pet they obviously can't look after drives me mad.