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To think an 18 year old doesn't need more support than a 21 year old?

(10 Posts)
Zinksy Mon 23-Oct-17 22:28:55

My best friend seems to think the 21 year old should be much more independent? Is this really true?

GeillisTheWitch Mon 23-Oct-17 22:30:35

I'd expect both of them to be reasonably independent at those ages, I was living away from home at 18.

coconuttella Mon 23-Oct-17 22:32:04

I grew up a lot between 18 and 21.... Obviously as adults they should be pretty independent at nothing those ages... though I wasn’t really at 18.

SasBel Mon 23-Oct-17 22:32:59

Depends, I left home at 16 so was very independent at an early age.
What sort of support?
Would have loved someone to do my washing for me as I did it all by hand grin

GardenGeek Mon 23-Oct-17 22:33:54

support and independence are different

A 21 year old is probably more independent as a person but may need more support at that age, ie. help after uni/ while finding job/ financially with no student loan anymore

An 18 year old is probably in uni and not spoken to their parents for 3 months - so independent but probably not really trying to do anything harder than live and stay clean. They will probably need support when they run out of money end of the term

Total whatiffery grin

Ttbb Mon 23-Oct-17 22:36:30

Yes, definitely. A lot if people will do a lot between the two, move out, get a first job, first relationship, first sex, first break up, university, the list goes on.

spidey66 Mon 23-Oct-17 22:40:07

I would think it was odd for an 18 year old at uni not to speak to their parents for 3 months while at uni. Even 30 years ago so pre mobile phones/Skype I think it would be the norm to speak to them at least weekly.

spidey66 Mon 23-Oct-17 22:42:40

My parents are dead now, but even in my 20s/30s I spoke to them roughly once a week. And at that stage I didn't need their support as much.

Crumbs1 Mon 23-Oct-17 22:58:54

I think a 21 year old should be more settled into adulthood. Eighteen has only just left school and may still be learning the ways of the world. We give our 19year old more practical and financial support than her siblings.

FrancisCrawford Mon 23-Oct-17 23:09:01

I saw a huge growth in terms of maturity in DD between 18 and 21. Really dramatic.

Absolutely she needed more support at 18 and Just finding her way in the world than at 21.

That’s not to say she doesn’t still need support of course, but it’s quite different than when she’d just left school, moved away to university and was very much finding her feet in a new world

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