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To worry about him cheating?

(5 Posts)
Whenwillitgeteasier Mon 23-Oct-17 19:16:11

I have a new boyfriend, of just over two weeks so very early days but so far everything has been great, we have so much in common with very similar outlooks and there are real fireworks, he's met my friends who all loved him and I'll be meeting his soon although we do have a mutual friend in common who is his best friend who is really lovely. It's basically all good so far and I think we can both see ourselves falling for each other.

However this weekend we were talking about past relationships and he admitted that he had an affair when he was with his previous partner who is the mother of his children and that was the reason they split up.

He got a bit emotional talking about it and said clearly it was the wrong thing to do, that the relationship had run it's course and they were just friends living together but he should have done the right thing and ended it instead of cheating.

Now I am a little concerned about this, on the one hand you can say you can never trust a cheater but on the other hand people do make mistakes and do learn from them. He obviously didn't have to tell me the truth as it's highly unlikely I'd find out and it did seem to be something that upset him to talk about.

Much as I like him I'm more than aware that its plenty early days enough to knock it on the head before i get too involved but everything else is fantastic so far.

What would you do?

Tilapia Mon 23-Oct-17 19:19:58

I cheated on a boyfriend when I was young and stupid, but I’ve been with DH for 20 years and never, ever cheated, so I don’t necessarily agree that once a cheater means always a cheater.

Depends on how long it was going on for though... a brief time is easier to understand than something that continued for months / years.

Whenwillitgeteasier Mon 23-Oct-17 19:24:08

I don't actually know how long for, I didn't really ask many questions at the time but maybe I need to.

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad Tue 24-Oct-17 08:31:05

I would just leave it. The phrase 'once a cheater ...' just isn't true - it's nonsense rhetoric.
I know plenty of people who cheated because they were in the wrong relationship but then once they found the right person never cheated again.
Enjoy your new relationship.

BubblyCat Tue 24-Oct-17 08:33:54

I would have thought if he intended to cheat again, he wouldn’t have told you about the affair.. so his intentions probably seem good

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