Talk

Advanced search

To not want to pay her share?

(88 Posts)
Helendee Mon 23-Oct-17 09:27:30

My son's fiancée, with whom I have a lovely relationship, has suggested that we go halves in paying for him to go to the Grand Prix next year which I am fine with and said yes to.
She's now saying that she wants me pay half of the total costs so that includes half of her ticket too! I don't know what to say. I can't easily afford it but don't want to cause any upset.
What should I do?

Maelstrop Mon 23-Oct-17 09:28:55

Tell her no, she's a cf!

Sandsunsea Mon 23-Oct-17 09:29:04

Refuse. Just say, I can't afford to pay for you but am happy to go halves on my sons ticket.

Pengggwn Mon 23-Oct-17 09:29:31

I initially thought YANBU but on reflection she was asking you to pay half of the total cost, not half of his ticket. This is a treat for your son from both of you; why should you get half the credit while she pays 75% of the cost? Others may disagree.

Pengggwn Mon 23-Oct-17 09:30:28

Sorry, obviously I am assuming she didn't specify 'the ticket' originally, and was assuming you understood she meant 'the trip'. Correct me if I am totally wrong and tell her you can only pay what was agreed.

RiversrunWoodville Mon 23-Oct-17 09:30:34

Got to give her marks for trying though! Just give her half the money for DS and tell her to pay her own

Pickleypickles Mon 23-Oct-17 09:31:05

So if you are paying half the total you are paying for a full ticket so really CF wants you to buy your sons ticket so she can take the glory 😂 tell her no way.

CandyMelts Mon 23-Oct-17 09:31:16

But the fiance gets to go, so she gets the experience. Unless she hates the idea of going, in which case going halves on 2 tickets and he get to take a friend is fair.

GeekyWombat Mon 23-Oct-17 09:31:52

Yeah I’d say no too!

RavingRoo Mon 23-Oct-17 09:32:02

If you can’t afford it you can’t afford it. Tell her that. Or pay the entire cost for your son

Birdsgottafly Mon 23-Oct-17 09:32:12

What is her finances like?

Do they live together?

And did you mean that you can easily afford it?

I've got Adult children and I have treated them and their Partners, in the past.

Likewise I have been treated by my (then) DPs Parents.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Mon 23-Oct-17 09:32:24

That means that you pay for him completely and she pays for herself.
Very good deal. For her!

Pickleypickles Mon 23-Oct-17 09:32:59

pengggwn
"She suggested we go half in paying for HIM to go the grand prix"
Nothing about her going too or the total cost.

Fishface77 Mon 23-Oct-17 09:33:17

Just say you can't afford to pay that much.

Justgivemesomepeace Mon 23-Oct-17 09:34:01

That means your paying for all his ticket and she's just paying for herself to have a nice day out. She's cheeky but I'd probably tell her she's a cf and cough up anyway if I could afford it easily.

Pengggwn Mon 23-Oct-17 09:35:04

Pickleypickles

Okay, fair point, but if someone approached me to ask this, I would assume they were going as a couple, not that he would want to go on his own. I might be unreasonable in that.

OP, was it clear she would be going too?

Justgivemesomepeace Mon 23-Oct-17 09:36:19

Sorry you say you can't easily afford it- misread it. Tell her you misunderstood what she meant and you can give her half for his ticket if she still wants to go ahead.

Helendee Mon 23-Oct-17 09:37:40

Sorry, yes she will go too but says she can't afford to pay in full for her ticket so wants me to pay half of both of their tickets. When she originally suggested it she asked if I wanted to go halves on my son's ticket, no mention of hers.
Financially neither of us have much spare income.

Pengggwn Mon 23-Oct-17 09:37:55

Then say no.

monkeywithacowface Mon 23-Oct-17 09:39:01

Just say you can't afford it. That's not unreasonable.

SilverSpot Mon 23-Oct-17 09:39:05

Ha ha shes a right CF!

So she wants to pay for her own ticket, an you pay for your sons?

Tell her no chance.

shushpenfold Mon 23-Oct-17 09:40:39

No is a complete word.

letsdolunch321 Mon 23-Oct-17 09:41:14

Politely tell her you can pay half towards his ticket but that is all.

Nikephorus Mon 23-Oct-17 09:42:05

"Sorry I can't afford to do that right now"

expatinscotland Mon 23-Oct-17 09:42:38

Then tell her no! That you can't afford to pay half the total costs, only for half your son's ticket. She's a CF. OR, that you need to consider an alternative gift for your son because you can't afford half the total costs and neither can you.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now