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AIBU to tell him to get help?

(7 Posts)
isittooearlytoputthekidstobed Mon 23-Oct-17 08:27:48

I've just listened to my husband dry heave for 10 minutes whilst he gets ready for work.
He is in a good job that he is doing very well in (constantly told this by his bosses), but gets so anxious /stressed by the thought of the work waiting for him that it makes him sick.
It was worse this morning as he's having some time off over half term so he knows there will be work building up while he's away.
He is very hard working and diligent and has promoted quickly in his job, but no one at work has a clue he gets so stressed, they all think he is very laid back!
Does anyone have any tips on how he can deal with this? He wants to be able to care less but doesn't know how to!
He has thought about changing jobs, but apart from something like dog walking (which he would love, but we cant afford that, and he would stress about not earning enough money!), he doesn't know what else he could do and I think he would have the same issue in most jobs as the pressure is self induced.
Any tips on how to help him deal with this would be really appreciated!

geekone Mon 23-Oct-17 08:49:07

It sounds hippy dippy but acupuncture meditation or mindfulness might help. He could go to a dr get medicated or a councillor but if he feels this is a stigma for him then the first options may help. I feel for him I went through a lot of shit with my work in 2015/16 and the stress can be unbearable an understanding DH and lovely DS really helped me keep it together flowers

isittooearlytoputthekidstobed Mon 23-Oct-17 08:53:16

He did actually try meditation years ago, but just used to fall asleep! grin I will investigate acupuncture though, thank you.

Madbum Mon 23-Oct-17 08:57:16

I did a taster session of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) the other day, you tap certain areas of the body to relieve stress while stating affirmations. I thought it would be a load of bollocks but it seems to be helping me deal with various stresses at the moment, might be worth a try?

KoolKoala07 Mon 23-Oct-17 09:00:05

Your poor husband. It's horrible feeling like this.
He could ask for some cbt from his doctor or even try some at home after a quick Google.

Zadig Mon 23-Oct-17 09:11:26

Your poor DH - and it's difficult for you to hear that too. Does he do any form of exercise or what does he like to do for himself? My DH can get very stressed too, but his cycling and karate seem to help his mindset.
Will he talk to you about it?

isittooearlytoputthekidstobed Mon 23-Oct-17 09:23:40

Thanks madbum, I'll look into that as well. He is good at talking to me about it, and he has a book which he reads and that helps put things in perspective for a week and then he slips back! He does enjoy sport, and he has just started up his favourite sport again, which I'm hoping will help focus his mind away from work work work!

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