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AIBU?

To expect a baby change in a restaurant / foodie pub...?

99 replies

SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:26

Went out for lunch today to a place we'd never been to before. An old pub, where ladies / gents and I assume disabled toilets were spread out.

Between courses I had to change dd. Went into ladies, no baby change. So asked (admittedly grumpy) waitress perfectly pleasantly where the baby change was. She looked at me strangely and snapped "we don't have one". And just stared at me. I answered ok, but slowly as was weighing up in my head where I could change dd thinking it might have to be the car boot even though it was raining heavily, and she just carried on watching me until I said ok again and walked away. She made no attempt to offer a solution / apology.

This was a pub that had high chairs and an extensive child's menu with colouring paper and pencils, so reasonably child friendly.

Ended up changing dd on a cold and cramped toilet floor, where people literally had to step over us. There was room on a wall for a changer.

AIBU to expect a simple baby change pull down table thing in 2017? I've been to a lot of pubs, restaurants, cafes etc both rural / remote and urban and never come across this before. Or am I just being a bit entitled? Genuinely interested and open to people telling me I'm expecting too much.

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TabbyMumz · 22/10/2017 19:29

That's why changing bags have changing mats attached to them.

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totaldiva · 22/10/2017 19:31

YANBU

I went to a family style pub and had the same thing, it had high chairs, a kids menu and crayons etc but no baby changing area. I haven’t been back.

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Mum2jenny · 22/10/2017 19:31

Not helpful tabby

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DrunkUnicorn · 22/10/2017 19:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheClacksAreDown · 22/10/2017 19:32

Yanbu

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totaldiva · 22/10/2017 19:33

The one I was in had very small ladies Loos with no room to change on the floor of the toilets on my mat.actually I do carry a couple of those disposable mats now too as I once had to change her on the floor of a Morrison’s loo as it was disgusting!

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TestingTestingWonTooFree · 22/10/2017 19:33

I'd have asked if they had one but not assumed they would. It pisses me off when they're only in the ladies' although DH tells me men's toilets are usually revolting.

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RandomUsernameHere · 22/10/2017 19:34

YANBU

Tabby I think OP meant on a changing mat on the floor but I may be wrong.

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BernardBlacksHangover · 22/10/2017 19:34

I've had this in a few places. I didn't think much of it tbh, but did think I might avoid with a baby in tow in the future. These were foodie pubs but no colouring pencils etc though.

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TabbyMumz · 22/10/2017 19:34

Sorry but "she made no attempt to offer a solution /apology"? She was the waitress for goodness sake. She didn't build the pub. It just seemed a bit entitled. I don't think I would have asked anyone about it I would have just whipped out the changing mat and got on with it, wherever I could.

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SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:36

tabby no need to be flippant Hmm

My changing bag does have a changing mat, and that I used. But still it's not great is it.

The service in the pub wasn't great so won't be wanting to return anyway, but this seals its fate. Sure other parents must feel the same.

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mirime · 22/10/2017 19:36

If they have high chairs and a children's menu definitely not unreasonable to expect baby change facilities of some sort.

DS strongly took against those pull down shelf things so I always had to change him on the floor.

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MaidOfStars · 22/10/2017 19:38

We got married at a lovely French restaurant which went far out of its way to discourage children. No baby change, no high chairs, no play things, open fires, glass floors, etc.

Was fab Wink

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Piratesandpants · 22/10/2017 19:40

YANBU. It’s clearky family friendly so it would be reasonable to have something other than the loo floor Hmm

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LakieLady · 22/10/2017 19:40

I know of several pubs in my town that have children's menus but no baby change. I don't think it's that unusual. They're mostly old buildings with tiny toilets, but there are at least 3 or 4 where there's room for a changing thingy on the wall, and they still haven't bothered to install them. (And yes, I have been in all of the 20+ pubs in town!)

Perhaps it's subtle discouragement for parents with babies and toddlers.

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SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:41

Tabby i actually think she was the landlady but was waitressing. The pub was a bit higgedy piggedy and the ladies was along a wide carpeted corridor. I could have changed my baby there rather than on a hard and cold toilet floor. That's what I meant by her potentially offering a solution - a suggestion in a large pub of where a nappy could be changed.

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Alanna1 · 22/10/2017 19:42

I once joined some work colleagues at the end of a long christmas lunch (I was on maternity leave). The (very posh and very hip and definitely not a place you go with children) venue had nowhere for me to change my very little baby. The maitre d’ with quite some style then had a table at the very back of the now largely empty restaurant cleared, laid it out with a table cloth, invited me to change my baby there, and then whisked the table cloth away afterwards. I was actually very impressed. Think of it on the rare occasions I go back there!

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SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:43

lakie I was wondering if it was discouragement. Which is fair enough. But if so, why offer an extensive child's menu and colouring pencils.

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SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:44

Tabby read Alannas post. That establishment offered a solution. Not a blank stare and a shrug.

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FuzzyCustard · 22/10/2017 19:50

Don't think I'd want babies to be changed on a carpet in an eating establishment. Not very washable, carpets.

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oblada · 22/10/2017 19:51

I've been to loads of places with no baby changing facilities or even hair chair, just got on with it! In other places I've also sent DH to change a baby (or he's been on his own) and he's had to make do as the baby changing was in the ladies loo. I just don't assume those facilities to be there and I get on with things :) you do sound a bit entitled yes...

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SpottyGecko · 22/10/2017 19:58

oblada are you in the U.K.? I guess I've been to loads of places too but never come across an absence of a baby change before hence my post. I guess after visiting hundreds of different places over a couple of kids maybe I have come to expect it.

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Ttbb · 22/10/2017 20:02

YANBU. If they have a children's menu they should have a baby change. There's a good chance that they did actually have one in their disabled toilets but the waitress was just a grumpy cow.

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StepAwayFromGoogle · 22/10/2017 20:02

I don't think that's entitled, OP. YANBU. If a pub is clearly marketed at families with young children, I think you can expect somewhere to change them. Rather than on a mat on a presumably filthy toilet floor.

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TabbyMumz · 22/10/2017 20:04

Sorry but I wouldn't be impressed with a baby being changed on a table people were going to eat off, whether he changed the table cloth or not. The op have already said it was a higgledy piggledy type pub with thin corridors etc, perhaps they are just doing their best. As I said, I would have just got over it myself and sorted baby out on the floor if I needed to. Yes it would be lovely if the whole world was kitted out to suit babies, but sometimes it's just not possible.

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