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Friend of 20 years assaulted me

(134 Posts)
Awomansworkisneverdone Sun 22-Oct-17 19:21:08

Absolutely gutted this has happened!
Me and my closest friend went out on a night out last night,the night started brilliantly! Few drinks,dancing the night away.
My friend noticed a old colleague if hers and a few of his friends and pretty much left me to it,at this point I wasn’t that bothered it was 1am and I was ready to go home. I told her I was heading home and do you want to taxi share, she said no going to stay here, I said I didn’t want to leave her there alone with all the men as they starting taunting her one put his lime from his glass down her cleavage. I told her I didn’t feel comfortable leaving her with all of them, she then said il go home with **** !! The colleague! She then said text “husband” tell him Iv gone home with you!
I refused to go along with it and left pretty angry!
She came down the road, staggering all over the place. I was flagging down a taxi. She walked up to me but fell back falling on her bum I picked her up linked her arm and tried to get her in the taxi!
She pulled her arm from me and slapped me hard in the face muttering something. I looked at her told her fine and left myself !
I burst into tears on the way home!
She’s never been aggressive towards me. Iv known her along time. She’s one of my closest friends.
I told my other half and he told me to wash my hands with her. I texted her this morning saying how much she hurt me and that I was worried about her and asked why she hit me.in that situation I would absolutely retaliate in defence but I couldn’t I was too upset and shocked. She replied saying she’s to fucking hungover to deal with this shit. shock AIBU to let this friendship go? I don’t know if I can forgive.

WhoWants2Know Sun 22-Oct-17 19:24:07

If someone hits you, it’s absolutely not unreasonable to cut them off. There isn’t anything positive to be gained from carrying on.

gamerchick Sun 22-Oct-17 19:24:56

Don’t contact her again and leave the ball in her court. Tbh how she goes on now will dictate how the friendship recovers.

Pickleypickles Sun 22-Oct-17 19:26:29

I was all for accepting her apology and talking it through until i read the bit where she cpuldnt be arsed?!
What a complete twat. People get drunk and do stupid things but to not even apologise i think shows how much your friendship means to her.
I would ignore her and if she comes grovelling talk to her about how (rightfully) hurt you are and take it from there but for now i think she has burned her bridges.

Wishfulmakeupping Sun 22-Oct-17 19:27:07

If she'd had immediately grovelled I might have given her a second chance but that response would be a deal breaker you deserve more than this treatment op. It's hard letting go of friendships but this definitely sounds toxic.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties Sun 22-Oct-17 19:27:52

The fact that she's not falling over herself to apologise says it all. sad
What a horrible end to your evening, hope you're ok.

Santawontbelong Sun 22-Oct-17 19:28:01

Nobody needs a friend like that. Block her and find someone worthy of your friendship. .

bettytaghetti Sun 22-Oct-17 19:28:41

Does she normally act this way when you go out? Could someone have slipped something in her drink?

Wishfulmakeupping Sun 22-Oct-17 19:28:51

Remember op not only did she attack you she treated you like crap up until that point- ignoring you, using you to lie for her etc
Hope you're ok

BlueThesaurusRex Sun 22-Oct-17 19:29:27

This friendship is over. Drunk or not, a slap is unforgivable. As is expecting you to cover for her potential ONS!

LondonNicki Sun 22-Oct-17 19:29:36

She was very drunk but that behaviour suggests she got issues/unhappiness going on in her personal life which might explain the excessive drinking and flirting. I'd step back..... she firstly needs to apologise profusely and feel very ashamed and only on that basis should you feel you should support her as a friend (over coffee!)

Flicketyflack Sun 22-Oct-17 19:30:53

You sound completely shocked by her behaviour and what a disappointing response from your text to her.

I think you have told her how you feel, leave it her to build bridges and take time, if she does, to decide whether you can forgive her. She needs to make the next move as you have said how you feel.

What a horrid evening, alcohol is no excuse you were trying to look out for her.

Witsender Sun 22-Oct-17 19:31:57

The slap isn't the only bit I would be ignoring her for tbh.

expatinscotland Sun 22-Oct-17 19:33:56

I'd not hesitate to cut her off.

MoistCantaloupe Sun 22-Oct-17 19:34:14

Cut lime boobs off. The fact she hasn't dashed to say sorry today shows you what you need to know!

sonjadog Sun 22-Oct-17 19:35:45

What a terrible evening. I can absolutely understand why you are shocked. It will take a few days to process it all. I suggest you leave it for a few days and see how you feel then. You would be absolutely in the right to never speak to her again, but after you have processed what happened, you may feel like you want to give her a chance to explain, as she is such an old friend. In any case, I would recommend waiting until you have calmed down to make any decisions either way.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sun 22-Oct-17 19:38:30

I expect she was still drunk sending that message. She's behaved appallingly.

BernardBlacksHangover Sun 22-Oct-17 19:39:08

I've had plenty of nights out with friends where someone's had too much to drink etc. Not once has anyone hit anyone else. That's fucked up really.

I agree with whoever said she sounds terribly unhappy, but the lack of apology is really bad. Maybe she doesn't remember exactly what happened? Did you tell her she hit you? I'd be devastated if I found out I'd done that to a friend.

Ploppie4 Sun 22-Oct-17 19:40:23

Text her DH and tell him what happened and say that’s it as far as you’re concerned. She’s no friend of yours

Awomansworkisneverdone Sun 22-Oct-17 19:42:09

I think il leave it a few days, no she doesn’t usually behave this way. She is a flirt and love the attention but that’s kind of how she is. She’s always been a good friend. I have no idea what came over her!
I’m upset angry disappointed.
She posted all of last nights photos on Facebook we took a few funny selfies but they are not on her wall. I don’t know.

Neverender Sun 22-Oct-17 19:42:34

That’s outrageous and I couldn’t forgive that without a sincere apology or genuine explanation.

SinisterBumFacedCat Sun 22-Oct-17 19:43:44

God that's horrible. And the worst is her reaction that she is "too hungover to deal with this shit" when she is wholeheartedly responsible for all the "shit" that happened. I'm sorry but fuck her, if that's how she has decided to treat you she is not your friend full stop. Honestly it's not just the slap it's her response this morning that is disgusting. I would let her know in no uncertain terms then block/ignore/run for the hills. You will make better friends, with anyone really. But she is no longer worthy of your time.

BaDumShh Sun 22-Oct-17 19:44:24

How old are you both, OP? She sounds very immature.

And yes, the friendship should be 100% over.

InsomniacAnonymous Sun 22-Oct-17 19:44:39

Great idea Ploppie

Italiangreyhound Sun 22-Oct-17 19:44:50

She does not really deserve your friendship, does she.

Looks like she was out on the pull and wanted you to cover for her. Not a very nice person but once she slapped your face she moved from not very nice to fucking horrible. I would certainly not be joining her on any more nights out.

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