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AIBU?

Completely confused.

38 replies

Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 19:42

I woke up this morning and said good morning to my partner like i do everyday and got a grunt in response.. he isnt a morning person so i just let it go over my head.. we didn't talk for the rest of the morning until he said bye when he went to work, 5 mins later i went into the fridge and noticed he had left the lunch i made him the night before so i called him to tell him and he said im not taking that shit... i said alright bye and he hung up .. that pissed me off but i let it slide after that he has ignored me for literally the whole day and not said a word to me and he usually calls me on his lunch for a chat so i messaged him and said you clearly have a problem but dont want to communicate it, you can eat the lunch i made you for dinner cause your wasting food then left it at that, he has been home for 2 hours and has not spoken a word to me .. im so so confused cause usually if he has a problem he is quick to tell me but everytime i ask he just says nothing it wrong ... i really am using every bit of will power i have not to lose it with him but i feel like if i do it will give him what he wants. shall i just carry on with life as normal (continue to cook etc) and wait for him to speak to me or ignore him aswell (stop cooking for him and no cleaning) or lay into him and tell him to get a grip.

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LeCroissant · 18/10/2017 19:43

I'd just go out for the evening and say 'I'll be back when you grow up.'

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SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 18/10/2017 19:45

God, that sounds exhausting.

Just carry on as normal, don't react to him.

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Backoff85 · 18/10/2017 20:00

Sounds like something bad has happened...maybe he's secretly been laid off

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:03

I was toying with the idea of going out but i have washed and wrapped my hair so im a bit stuck haha .

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:05

He would usually tell me if something bad has happened and he works for himself so i dont think its work related . Im just sooooo confused

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userabcname · 18/10/2017 20:19

Ask him what's going on? If he doesn't usually behave like this then I would definitely try to clear the air tonight.

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RunRabbitRunRabbit · 18/10/2017 20:22

i really am using every bit of will power i have not to lose it with him but i feel like if i do it will give him what he wants.

Does that mean you don't think anything is genuinely wong, he just wants to pick a fight?

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Doramaybe · 18/10/2017 20:24

Man child having a hissy fit over something unconnected.

Ignore and it might go away. Do not feed it.

He is mad as hell that you caught the lunch left in the fridge, red face moment there! Will all blow over.

But try not to be too judgmental and picky about such minor things aswell.

If it continues, well there are strategies.

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InsomniacAnonymous · 18/10/2017 20:25

It sounds so upsetting and worrying. I can't think what you can do apart from trying to get him to explain what's going on. He's very cruel to behave like this.

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ethelfleda · 18/10/2017 20:26

I bloody hate sulkers. Tell him to grow up or get out!

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Doramaybe · 18/10/2017 20:28

Oh and why do YOU make the pack up lunch for HIM? Does he alternate for you?

I think he might be feeling a wee bit controlled here. But what do I know. Nothing I expect.

IMO there was no need to call him out on forgetting the lunch at all. It happens sometimes. You seem a wee bit needy here sorry.

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:39

I called him cause i was gonna drop him his lunch ... i wasnt moaning i said babe you forgot your lunch expecting him to say oh shit then i was gonna offer to take it to him . He just got in bed and turned down the tele i was watching .. im gonna ignore it i think and let him speak to me when he is ready . He used to do this kind of stuff when we were 19 and i was overly in love and would beg for his attention .. maybe he is feeling unloved lol .

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:40

Oh and also i dont make him a packed lunch he usually has the left over dinner from the night before cause he likes a big lunch i just put it in a container and he takes it with him.

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RunRabbitRunRabbit · 18/10/2017 20:41

Don't beg.

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outofmydepth45 · 18/10/2017 20:44

Turn the TV back up

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Alittlepotofrosie · 18/10/2017 20:46

You know relationships shouldn't be this much hard work?

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Doramaybe · 18/10/2017 20:48

What age range are you both? Just wondered.

You said in OP that he forgot the lunch that YOU MADE HIM. Just saying.

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:50

As a whole the relationship is usually great and we communicate with each other when either of us are unhappy, this is just so random to me.

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InsomniacAnonymous · 18/10/2017 20:51

I don't think I'd fancy leftovers from dinner for lunch, but that's just me. If that's what you're both happy doing it's fine of course.

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:52

Yeah cause i made the dinner so i did make it however i think a couple of people misunderstood what i meant when i said i called him about his lunch i wasnt upset that he forgot it i was just reminding him. We are both late twentys.

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bimbobaggins · 18/10/2017 20:55

Just go and say what the fucks your problem. Don’t tip toe round absolutely him. Yes don’t need to put up with this the crap

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 20:56

Yes its not something i would enjoy either he actually requests it and if he hasnt enjoyed the dinner the night before he will normally tell me and ill make him tuna pasta or something quick.

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Trailedanderror · 18/10/2017 20:57

How strange. He's acting as if you've wronged him! have you OP? I'd be wracking my brains for what I'd done, although I'm innocent I have a guilty conscience!

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Doramaybe · 18/10/2017 20:59

So you do dance to his tune.

He doesn't like the dinner, so doesn't like the leftovers, so you make tuna pasta or something quick for him to take to work. Rod for your own back there girl.

I suppose he does the same for you every other week or at weekends. Bet he does.

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Vsantanaxx · 18/10/2017 21:00

I really dont think i have done anything but who knows .. last night we went to bed happy and everything seemed fine. I think im just gonna keep my distance and see how he is tomorrow.

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