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To struggle with #metoo

(363 Posts)
BookyBook Tue 17-Oct-17 09:29:15

Is anyone else struggling with this?

I can't even articulate why and why I am so reluctant to post #metoo myself, although don't want to not either. My FB thread is full of it and I didn't realise it was a thing to do until yesterday and it has completely blindsided me.

Having said that I think it makes a very strong point, I just feel a little teary about seeing all the #metoos today in a way that is making me relive my own experiences that I have trained myself not to think about too much usually.

Is anyone else the same?

CaoNiMartacus Tue 17-Oct-17 09:29:59

I'm struggling as well. I can't quite articulate it.

LordPercy Tue 17-Oct-17 09:31:47

I agree with this.

BlueThesaurusRex Tue 17-Oct-17 09:32:09

Absolutely the same. Someone on twitter posted this and I think it goes some way to explaining how I feel...

‘Reminder that if a woman didn't post #MeToo, it doesn't mean she wasn't sexually assaulted or harassed. Survivors don't owe you their story.’

BookyBook Tue 17-Oct-17 09:32:24

The best I can come up with is that I don't like seeing something that I hold so close turning into a hashtag but even that isn't quite it

BlueThesaurusRex Tue 17-Oct-17 09:32:38

Crossed with above!

DearMrDilkington Tue 17-Oct-17 09:32:38

It's to shock people in to realising how common sexual harassment/assault and rape is.

I think it's a clever idea, I can't bring myself to do it though.

peppersaunt Tue 17-Oct-17 09:32:44

Of course I could post #metoo (I assume all working women could, unfortunately) but I’m finding it a bit too #icebucketchallenge

kittykarate Tue 17-Oct-17 09:33:27

Some bloke on my facebook is saying that women who haven't been assaulted should pipe up with #NotMe so that people can see that for every woman who says #MeToo there is 100 who haven't been. hmm

Redglitter Tue 17-Oct-17 09:34:23

I can see totally where you're coming from. Its all over fb but I have no intention what so ever of joining in. Just makes me feel uncomfortable and a bit attention seeking to be honest

KoalaD Tue 17-Oct-17 09:35:03

I struggle with any trend on Facebook that claims to 'raise awareness', whilst not actually doing anything.

BookyBook Tue 17-Oct-17 09:35:15


I think he must live in dreamland.

This whole thing makes me really sad for my daughter. In a way knowing it is as widespread as it is makes me feel worse, not better

ShirleyPhallus Tue 17-Oct-17 09:35:47

I've seen a few responses that I feel uncomfortable with

A few "let's spread positively instead of negativity" statuses

And a few "let's not forget men suffer from sexual harassment too" statuses

ThePeanutGallery Tue 17-Oct-17 09:36:13

I usually avoid these bandwagon things like the plague, but #Metoo is the only time I actually agree with using social media to highlight an important issue. People like to hide their head in the sand about the full impact of sexual assault and harassment, so maybe seeing SO many women (almost every one of my female facebook friends) will highlight the severity.

Whatsername17 Tue 17-Oct-17 09:37:24

I find social media things like this difficult too. I've never been sexually assaulted though. I'd like to support the women who have, I'm just not sure social media is the right place to do it. I think this is heightened for me by the fact that there is someone on my Facebook making things up about it too. She is like that, a bit of a Facebook activist. Never breastfed her children but posts about the discrimination she faced when she did. She's posting now about an 'assault' that she told me a couple of years ago she'd made up. I don't know. I'm just furious that my daughter's are growing up in a world where theblikelyhood of them being assaulted is high.

BookyBook Tue 17-Oct-17 09:37:47

I agree with you peanut in theory .. like I said my response might not be rational!

IvorHughJars Tue 17-Oct-17 09:38:38

I struggle with it because whilst I understand that the idea is to 'shock people' into realising how frequently and pervasive it is, that's not news to most women. So who are we trying to shock? Men? I don't feel comfortable sharing intimate information, however vaguely it's couched, with a group of people whose only excuse for not knowing how common it is is wilful bloody ignorance.

GrockleBocs Tue 17-Oct-17 09:38:47

Totally agree with the OP.

IvorHughJars Tue 17-Oct-17 09:39:21

That doesn't mean I don't admire the idea or the people who have participated. I just can't do it myself and I struggle with articulating just why that is.

MorrisZapp Tue 17-Oct-17 09:40:26

I think it's a good idea but it's not for me. I'm absolutely fine and the last thing I want is sad emojis or u ok hon. Also, my family are on there and it's not something I choose to discuss with them.

ThePeanutGallery Tue 17-Oct-17 09:40:44

BookyBook your response is perfectly rational. Everyone handles this issue in their own way, and that's fine, and should be encouraged. The fact that you feel the way you do is not only an example of what an emotional issue it is, but also maybe an example of why it needs to be done.

BookyBook Tue 17-Oct-17 09:41:43

I don't feel comfortable sharing intimate information, however vaguely it's couched, with a group of people whose only excuse for not knowing how common it is is wilful bloody ignorance.

This! This goes some way to helping me pinpoint how I feel.

Respect to those to have posted though.

Biddie191 Tue 17-Oct-17 09:41:56

I think many me live in dreamland - and the majority who have done so don't think of it as assault. They carry on, never considering the impact of their actions.
I worked with a man who once told me that he worked on the 'how would I feel if someone did that to my daughter' way of thinking about how he behaved around women, which I thought was a good start.

BishBoshBashBop Tue 17-Oct-17 09:41:57

I agree with you OP.

That's ridiculous kitty

Just as someone on my SM 'called out' a male friend for using it as only women should when she fully well knows what he has been through.

SlipperyLizard Tue 17-Oct-17 09:42:06

I doubt you'd find anyone who didn't enter a convent at a very young age (and not even all those women) to say "notmetoo"

Which is a sad state of affairs.

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