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To think my friend is mad for refusing to vaccinate?

(370 Posts)
FannyTheFlamingo Fri 13-Oct-17 19:20:16

I'll admit, I'm a bit ignorant on this subject. My DD is nearly 1 and she's been vaccinated. It wasn't something I gave too much thought to, I just did it because I thought it was for the best.

My friend has done her research and says that she doesn't want to risk her son getting brain damage from a vaccine. She says if he catches something and dies, she could forgive herself, but she couldn't if something happened as a result of a vaccination. Is she mad?

I'm hoping MN users have differing views and are much better informed than I am. I don't want to convince her to change her mind, but would like to offer her some pro vaccination advice.

Or do I just keep my beak out?

dinosaursandtea Fri 13-Oct-17 19:21:36

Yep, he's mad. And putting other children at risk as well.

dinosaursandtea Fri 13-Oct-17 19:21:56

*she, sorry.

TheQueenOfWands Fri 13-Oct-17 19:23:40

No, I think it's her choice.

FruitCider Fri 13-Oct-17 19:24:20

Tbh if your friend would rather increase the chance of their child dying so she doesn’t have to live with the guilt of the small risk of brain damage from a vaccine then she’s far too into this woo for anything you say to make a difference...

TeaAndToast85 Fri 13-Oct-17 19:24:37

Yep, mad. And selfish for putting other children at risk. Why people think their own googling is more reliable than the advice of medical professionals is completely beyond me.

Anecdoche Fri 13-Oct-17 19:24:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nocake Fri 13-Oct-17 19:25:14

People who make a decision to not vaccinate are rarely persuaded that they're wrong. They've made a decision that goes against all evidence so it's difficult to use facts and evidence to change their mind.

Pengggwn Fri 13-Oct-17 19:26:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slightlyglittermaned Fri 13-Oct-17 19:26:46

"done her research" usually means "can type stuff into Google", rather than "has higher level qualifications in statistics, medicine, & experimental design", plus extensive experience in that particular field.

Humans are pretty shit at understanding probabilities - that's why the antivax sites make so much money off people's fear.

Icanhearmynebioursshouting Fri 13-Oct-17 19:26:56

Well your friend and anyone else who does this is pathetic. My nephew relies on these people getting vaccinated otherwise he could die. So yes I think she's ignorant

QuopQuop Fri 13-Oct-17 19:27:19

I think she is right

She had looked into this and made an INFORMED decision about HER child.

Ever thought maybe the mad people are the ones that injection their babies with all sorts of harmful chemicals because "the doctors say it's okay"


CheshireChat Fri 13-Oct-17 19:27:50

I wonder if she feels that her newborn is more vulnerable right now to the vaccine rather than an older child against a potential illness?

Completely misguided in my opinion, but it may play a part.

FormerlyFrikadela01 Fri 13-Oct-17 19:28:30

I know some people have have done the "research" and decided not to vaccinate.
People who are convinced antivax websites are unlikely to listen to reason so I wouldn't waste my breath.
Ultimately though it's her choice.

Wellonlyifihavetoo Fri 13-Oct-17 19:29:17

Anti vaxxers are selfish imo. I’m pregnant and it would never occur to me not to get either myself or my other kids vaccinated. Preventable diseases like measles can kill/disable, why would u risk it? It boils my blood angry

RedBlackberries Fri 13-Oct-17 19:29:21

I know quite a few people that chose not to vaccinate and their reasons are researched and they genuinely feel it's for the best. I do vaccinate and sometimes get it in the neck from those who don't but it doesn't bother me.

WhosTakingDeHorseToFrance Fri 13-Oct-17 19:30:03

She's done her research from a lot of discredited sources on the internet and chooses to believe that she knows better..fine.
Personally I believe antivaxers are nuts who put the rest of the population at risk. I could not keep my trap shut but realistically that sort of person usually "knows better" than accredited peer reviewed cold clinical science hmm infuriating!!

LilQueenie Fri 13-Oct-17 19:30:34

Its her choice. Lots of children are fine, lots are not. Im sure shes not judging you or calling you mad.

reallyorange Fri 13-Oct-17 19:30:53

She's either gullible, irrational and ill-informed or arrogant and selfish. Or both. Anti-vaxxers are awful.

YouTheCat Fri 13-Oct-17 19:33:56

She's a fucking idiot unless there is an actual, valid reason why her children cannot be vaccinated. She's putting vulnerable people at risk as well as her own children.

mogulfield Fri 13-Oct-17 19:34:09

Ahh anti vaxers, where science goes to die.

I think the very very small risk of vaccinating my child is worth the very real and large risk of them contracting a horrible, potentially lethal illness (measles, meningitis). I’d rather my child didn’t die of a preventable disease.

Your friend is illogical, and at best very poor at risk analysis.

Ttbb Fri 13-Oct-17 19:34:34

Yes. There is no difference between a child dying because you vaccinated them and a child dying because you didn't vaccinate them. As a parent you would still feel responsible which brings me to my next point. She is also stupid if she thinks that she could forgive herself if her child died because she didn't vaccinate. Her choice not to vaccinate however doesn't arise from stupidity it arises from scientific illiteracy and arrogance. Anyone who reads the science and cones to the conclusion that vaccines are too risky is scuentifically illiterate. Anyone who is scientifically illiterate but still thinks that their 'research' makes them more I formedthan scientists who have been studying and developing vaccines for decades is arrogant.

slightlyglittermaned Fri 13-Oct-17 19:35:33

You won't convince her. Rational argument and evidence just doesn't work once someone's bought that line - unfortunately my DP while not full-on antivaxxer (our son is vaccinated, though some were delayed by arguments) has bought into the BS and there really is no reasoning with the fear. I try not to discuss it directly with him because argument seems to only strengthen the belief.

JumpingJellybeanz Fri 13-Oct-17 19:36:11

Well clearly her research is shit.

WhatwouldAryado Fri 13-Oct-17 19:36:59

I think she's mad. I had meningitis as a child. I am beyond lucky to be here.
The "research" She has done is frankly bollocks.

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