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I know I am but please help me be punny!

(48 Posts)
y0rkier0se Wed 11-Oct-17 23:13:14

I've been charged with the (unfortunate) task of writing the nativity play for Year 2 (6/7 year olds). The theme is alter-nativity.. I'm thinking the traditional story but with a minimal script and pop songs to tell the story. The pop songs must be age appropriate but I can tweak lyrics. So far I have come up with "born in Bethlehem sung to the tune of "born in the USA", "baby baby baby" by Justin Beiber when the baby is born, "Gold" by Spandau Ballet for when the three kings bring their gifts.. and DP suggested "push it" by salt n peppa for the birth scene but I don't think that's appropriate somehow! Any suggestions?

Friendofsadgirl Wed 11-Oct-17 23:14:45

Here comes the Sun? Sorry, first thing that came into my head.

y0rkier0se Wed 11-Oct-17 23:18:33

Love that! Thanks

grumpysquash3 Wed 11-Oct-17 23:20:34

is it just a little bit of a song for each bit?
My brain is singing 'Gimme, gimme, gimme a star after midnight'
You would surely have to have 'Mary's Boy Child' (Boney M or sometime around then if it wasn't them)

Some modern stuff would work well, can you tweak the lyrics of Ed Sheeran's 'Perfect' (or use it as Mary rides on the donkey)?

WorraLiberty Wed 11-Oct-17 23:21:07

Like a virgin by Madonna

They can sing it while Mary pisses on a stick grin

I'm not very good at this, am I? blush

y0rkier0se Wed 11-Oct-17 23:26:30

Yeah I'm thinking just a verse or chorus or even just a clip. Maybe not like a virgin 😂 Going to look up perfect thanks!

elephantoverthehill Wed 11-Oct-17 23:28:04

Perhaps a cockney twist as M&J are looking for lodgings 'Any old inn, any, any old inn?'

grumpysquash3 Wed 11-Oct-17 23:57:43

I think you've kicked off the cabaret version smile

Normalserviceissuspended Thu 12-Oct-17 00:03:56

I don't really think that any of it is appropriate-and certainly not for 6 year olds- sorry. If you want a pop opera then chose something other than a nativity. Some things are better kept traditional.

KeepServingTheDrinks Thu 12-Oct-17 00:04:08

If you're doing "Gold" for one of the gifts, how about "Hey Frankie" (Sister Sledge???) for the Frankincense. Not sure what you'd do for the Myrrh though.....

grumpysquash3 Thu 12-Oct-17 00:06:40

You could have a crowd of girl angels singing a version of Beyonce's "If I were a boy" (obviously change the words a lot, but the tune is good). Or change it to "if I were a King" if it fits in better elsewhere.

Normalserviceissuspended Thu 12-Oct-17 00:09:32

What I meant was that 6 year olds won't get the jokes- so the puns and the songs will be above their heads. That means you are doing it for the adults- not the children. Most 6 year olds will not have done a traditional nativity to death yet. It is something special (even if not religious and I am not)

It is twee, I hate productions that are put on by children but are not accessible to children.

grumpysquash3 Thu 12-Oct-17 00:10:34

Not sure what you'd do for the Myrrh though.....

You could Myrrh through almost any song without words. myrrh-myrrh myrrh myrrh MYRRH MYYRRRRHHHH - that's the first line of happy birthday to you (i.e. Jesus).

They could actually sing Happy Birthday.

I'm totally into this smile

MrsOverTheRoad Thu 12-Oct-17 00:15:08

You do know there are many, very good free Nativity scripts available? Why make someone write a new one!?

Agree with pp that it's all a bit naff when the kids probably won't get the jokes.

grumpysquash3 Thu 12-Oct-17 00:15:38

Normal I take your point, but surely Panto is exactly the same? The kids enjoy it anyway.

For kids that aren't religious, does it really make any difference? Do non religious kids even know the nativity? I do take on that some parents/kids might totally be religious and don't think it's appropriate. But it really depends on the school - if it's a non religious school, surely it's ok. My DC are older now, but we had "Xmas and the Aliens" etc. and everyone seemed to enjoy it.

Dixiestampsagain Thu 12-Oct-17 00:22:13

Myrrh, myrrh, myrrh, how do you like it, how do you like it?!

ineedaholidaynow Thu 12-Oct-17 07:28:47

When DS was at Primary School they used to buy in plays including Nativity plays. The Nativity ones were very rarely traditional and usually very loosely based on the Nativity.

These plays were full of jokes/puns the children didn't get. I was a parent volunteer and would sometimes help with rehearsals. We would have to tell children to pause after certain lines as the parents would be laughing, but the children had no idea why, no matter how many times they had delivered the lines.

IveGotBillsTheyreMultiplying Thu 12-Oct-17 07:40:15

'Where are you gonna sleep tonight?' Amy McDonald.

NerrSnerr Thu 12-Oct-17 07:43:37

Reach for the star?

NerrSnerr Thu 12-Oct-17 07:44:23

The donkey would walk 500 miles?

saoirse31 Thu 12-Oct-17 07:46:12

So at Eid will you be running a similar type play? And will you do the same about important dates in Hindu, Sikhs, Buddhists religions?

Thought not. Maybe you should consider why that is.

SouthWindsWesterly Thu 12-Oct-17 07:46:30

Phahahaha!!! The donkey ride to Bethlehem to the music of the proclaimed! Fantastic!

FenellaMaxwellsPony Thu 12-Oct-17 07:48:34

One thing to check is if you need a PRS license - some of those songs may well incur a royalties charge for public performance, which includes school plays.

ibuiltahomeforyou Thu 12-Oct-17 07:58:42

I think this is a terrible idea.

Is it not just a bit weird to put on a show that is totally all about the audience, using music the children most likely won’t even know? It seems like it is essentially a series of jokes/puns the children won’t even understand.

If my child was in this I’d be totally confused - I hate pantomimes for the ‘jokes for the dads’ bits as they are just laughing up their sleeve at the children too young to work out what the joke is.

SandmanSlim Thu 12-Oct-17 08:09:09

What about "Myrrh, huh, what is it good for?"

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