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No, I don't want to find Jesus!

(80 Posts)
BastardTart Wed 11-Oct-17 18:54:03

I have a friend who is a evangelical Christian. She is lovely, kind, funny, great fun to hang out with, our dc play well together, etc, etc.

But she keeps inviting me to weird brainwashy religious type meetings, where new recruits (for want of a better word) are offered delicious food and a talk about how Jesus wants to welcome them into his flock.

Now her church is a huge part of her life, but religion isn't something for me. But she persists in trying to convert me despite the fact I've stated I'm not interested. How can I get her to stop?

Farontothemaddingcrowd Wed 11-Oct-17 18:56:20

I think that's the whole essence of being an evangelical Christian. I guess you just have to be honest with her and if it doesn't stop, you have two options. End the friendship or accept it as it is. I couldn't cope with it tbh.

GeillisTheWitch Wed 11-Oct-17 18:57:26

Turn up to the next meeting wearing this, I'm guessing you won't be invited again.

Hufflepuff719 Wed 11-Oct-17 18:57:27

Either tell her very firmly but kindly that you are really not interested in religion.

Or, why don't you invite her out to another social group regularly?

Your friend probably enjoys the social aspect of the Christian group, as well as the religion, and she wants to include you in this.

DesignedForLife Wed 11-Oct-17 18:57:30

Tell her you're not interested and you don't want to be invited anymore. Tell her if you ever do get interested you'll let her know. If she keeps on banging on about it you might have to reconsider the friendship. I say this as an evangelical Christian... though probably not a good on because I can't remember the last time I invited someone to something.

araiwa Wed 11-Oct-17 18:58:04

Hes been missing over 2000 years. Poor lad

SweetChickadee Wed 11-Oct-17 19:00:08

He's over there --->

Hoppinggreen Wed 11-Oct-17 19:00:13

Delicious food you say?
I could feign imter st long enough to stuff my face if the food was good and plentiful

WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo Wed 11-Oct-17 19:02:30

Invite her to a Café Scientifique or humanist or something meeting each time she invites you to a church event?

Or go along and behave really outrageously...

BlackeyedSusan Wed 11-Oct-17 19:02:35

tell her she is putting you off even more. ( logic, she want you to convert, doing stuff that makes you less likely to convert is stupid)

tell her she is not being "loving" by annoying you with invitations. (guilt)

tell her it is the Holy Spirit's job not hers... (theology)

on the plus sides she does care about you, as it is important from her point of view, but she has a really shit way of showing you if you have said you are not interested and said it is annoying you. You are going to end up not being friends anymore at this rate.

Guavaf1sh Wed 11-Oct-17 19:04:47

Well that's a shame as he was here just now looking for you

FakePlasticTeaLeaves Wed 11-Oct-17 19:12:11

What kind of food is it?

nocoolnamesleft Wed 11-Oct-17 19:13:07

Tell us more about the delicious food.

The80sweregreat Wed 11-Oct-17 19:16:42

My mum was a christian, but she never ever told anyone what to do or believe in. Each to their own, just try not to get me on board. She knew i was a lost cause and left it there. Its an individual choice.
If you want to get involved with your friend's church, it should be because you want to, not because your friend said it might be a good idea or the food is nice or whatever. i really do not like people that push their beliefs on to others.

brasty Wed 11-Oct-17 19:20:02

A friend tried to convert me, then gave up fairly quickly. But I did go along once for the delicious food. And it was delicious.

VladmirsPoutine Wed 11-Oct-17 19:20:21

If you've told her numerous times but she still persists the only thing is to cut off the relationship. Block and delete.
This is clearly an impasse.

picklemepopcorn Wed 11-Oct-17 19:23:55

Being 'invitational' is an important part for many people. It's not about pressure, it's about reminding you the door is open should you ever want to go in. Don't let it stop you hanging out with her. It's a bit like someone who loves Chinese offering you a taste- 'go on, you might like it!' Don't get hung up on it!

SparklyUnicornPoo Wed 11-Oct-17 19:27:22

Does she actually realise it's a converting people thing or does she just think of it as a nice evening out? My mum is very religious and doesn't seem to understand why her non-religious friend would be put off of going to things like this by 'a bit of chatting about Jesus' (it is never just a bit of chatting by the way, I'm religious and I find mums dinners too much)

I would either, go along to one meeting so you can honestly say you've tried it and it's not for you and hope she stops asking, or be really blunt about it.

Mamabear4180 Wed 11-Oct-17 19:31:15

I've got a similar friend and I've been to her church and frankly it scared the willies out of me grin It was so happy clappy and everyone hugged me which kinda did my head in! I've been invited to her baby's dedication at the church so going to have to suck it up for that one. I do sort of believe in God but not a christian myself, more of a pagan so don't mind a few hymns but all the dancing and raising of hands is a bit much for me.

peppapigearworm Wed 11-Oct-17 19:34:11

She's an evangelical christian. By definition she is not going to stop trying to convert you, its the centre of her faith.

vdbfamily Wed 11-Oct-17 19:58:28

speaking as an evangelical Christian, it is often those who are recent converts often from fairly difficult circumstances where their new faith has had a profound impact on their life and they are unable to stop it all bubbling out. I manage quite a small hospital team where over 50% of us are Christians. I have noticed how different each of us are in how we share that. We are instructed in the Bible to evangelise but I would agree that once you have asked a couple of times, you should let others ask the questions if they are interested and not keep pushing it.

xqwertyx Wed 11-Oct-17 20:00:08

Has your friend actually seen your mumsnet username @BastardTart gringrin

xqwertyx Wed 11-Oct-17 20:03:27

I dont know much about religion, but if you could maybe politely keep declining her invites she will eventually realise it isn’t going to happen. She sounds lovely though, like mentioned below she probably wants you to have some of the good stuff she has found!

TaliZorahVasNormandy Wed 11-Oct-17 20:05:43

Find Jesus? I think it's safe to say, he's the undisputed champion of hide and seek.

topcat2014 Wed 11-Oct-17 20:05:50

Before I met DW, I tried the Alpha Course, and even went on a 'weekend away', including 'speaking in tongues'.

Some lovely people, and the food was nice, (saved cooking) but it made me realise that religion was not me.

Joined a social group that met in the pub instead, and promptly met DW.

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