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To be really really sad that today my dreams will yet again be crushed

(30 Posts)
EffieFuckingFairy Wed 11-Oct-17 10:42:22

So I’m 38. Recently became a mature student to study Accounting. I’m a lone parent after my ex had an affair 2 years ago and been treating our girls like shit and me. Loads have been happening with him and his family that I always want to post about but I always only read other threads on Mumsnet instead. I posted about some of it before when my ex left my girls on my doorstep an drove off knowing I wasn’t at home and the times I’ve fallen apart.

Long story short but last 2 years have been hell. I started a job over 18 months ago doing nothing but admin but not specific tasks and not ever learning anything knew. Wages were minimum but I could only afford to work 16 hours in the end due to childcare and the fact that once my ex heard he might have to cover some of the childcare he stopped seeing them. He didn’t pay maintenance for over a year on a 60k salary. We don’t live in the south so that money goes far. Anyway he now pays but randomly decides every now and then that he doesn’t have enough money to cover certain months and CMS can’t at this point take it direct from him. He refuse to help with childcare to allow me to get a better job or work holidays etc.

I decided to study to be an Accountant to give the girls a better future. Made enquiries to Uni and Student Finance and got accepted quite late and I’m the only mature student in my class of 18 year olds. Small uni. I did receive a CertHE in Computing in 2012 which was supposed to be for a Foundation Degree in Computing but due to issues at college and my personal issues some modules which was handed in wasn’t marked and I was few modules short to graduate.

Tax credits and housing benefits has all been suspended since August pending Student Finance Assessment. Hopefully this will be completed by Friday/Monday. However someone at Student Finance told me yesterday that I won’t get the first year Tuition fees paid. They said that if I went on to do an undergraduate in Computing I would have had it all funded but because it’s Accounting I can’t get it funded. Possibly 2nd year as well unless I can send them a letter with the circumstances.

I am now already liable for this terms fees and if I have to leave Uni now my life will go back to the shitty way it’s been. I am not from the UK so haven’t got a single person to ask for assistance. But this studies was my break away from him and his family. Getting independent from them as I’ve had to repeatedly deal with them causing so much upset time and again. I have struggled to even get an interview before and even tried applying for apprenticeships.

I have a meeting with Uni in an hour to decide my fate. They told me on the phone I can use my maintenance loan to pay for the fees but then I don’t have money to live on. I am absolutely devastated that all this excitement and work I’ve put in already will be it. I was so proud to explain to my almost 10 year old what I’ll be doing. I took both of our girls to Uni so that they can understand. I just genuinely don’t know what I’ll do financially to better our lives after this.

Please please tell me what I can do. Or AIBU for being so very upset and devastated. I just can’t stop crying.

OhShit2017 Wed 11-Oct-17 10:47:23

The uni might be able to help out via the hardship fund? Even if they could just pay some of the fees for you, you might then be able to set up a payment plan for the rest of it?

CotswoldStrife Wed 11-Oct-17 10:49:43

Is it because the Foundation year tuition fees (for the Computing course) were paid and you can't have two lots of first year fees?

Flyingflipflop Wed 11-Oct-17 10:50:28

Can you not go down the AAT route? Once you get to level 3 (you might already have exemptions from your studies so far) you can set up as a bookkeeper and use that to pay for your further studies.

BlueSapp Wed 11-Oct-17 11:02:12

What Flying said, The best route for you to becoma a chartered accountant, is to study the Accouning technitions exams, they are part time classes and are sponsored by a job, there are lots of firms willing to fund this for you, or if you cant securea job straight away, the fees arnt as much as uni and can be paid bi monthly.

Once you have completed the first year of the technitions course, if your marks are good enough you can jump straight into the chartered exams, however you might want to complete the two year course and gain a qualification and more experiance before moving on to the professional exams as there is quite a leap in material.

The qualification can be done part tiem and you will be able to earn as you do it, for me it would suit your circumstances. your Ex is dusce, I hope you can do this and show him he cant control you or your DCs.

guilty100 Wed 11-Oct-17 11:02:26

I don't quite understand your situation. Can you get a loan for your tuition fees? They should cover both tuition and maintenance, not just maintenance? You could then use your earnings to support your family?

Alternatively, what about shifting to computing if the fees are paid? You could then do an accountancy postgraduate conversion course, which is much shorter, and get into the profession that way? I think there are also graduate schemes where you can train on the job.

Not the end to your dreams, just a temporary and conquerable setback.

kuniloofdooksa Wed 11-Oct-17 11:04:14

Almost all further and higher education is government-subsidised to a greater or lesser extent. Even if you pay £9,000+ per year in fees, that's less than the £15,000+ that international students and those who don't qualify for subsidy have to pay.

It is completely normal and reasonable that the rules state that you can't get the same subsidy twice. The government will subsidise each level of education once but it won't cough up again for career changes and those who drop out of courses and want to restart years later.

Is there any chance you could get yourself accepted into year 2 of a course instead of year 1 - do they have a computer science with accountancy course option for which your previous study could be counted as credit?

I think the rules preventing people from repeatedly taking subsidised courses at the same level are good. However, too many 18 year olds are funnelled into registering for course that aren't really right for them because they don't really know what they want and unemployment sucks, without understanding that this is they one and only shot at subsidised higher education and if it is the wrong choice then subsequent courses would have to be self-funded. This ought to be made clearer.

flimflaminurjams Wed 11-Oct-17 11:07:18

I'd see your local CAB. They will be able to advise and casework re housing benefits etc

BlueSapp Wed 11-Oct-17 11:09:06

Meant to say, you do not need a uni degree for the technitions course.

StaplesCorner Wed 11-Oct-17 11:11:59

I'd second taking it to the CAB, you need to ask for a benefits review.

Expemsiveuniform Wed 11-Oct-17 11:14:38

You really should have chased up the Cert before and made sure you had enough handed in to get your foundation degree. You won’t get help with fees over and over.

Not withstanding that, I hope the Uni can find a work around for you to let you carry on. And do go and see CAB or a benefits advisor

mollifly Wed 11-Oct-17 11:15:48

They are right, you only get three years funding plus a 'spare year'. If you've used two years funding regardless of the qualification then you cant be funded.

The university financial assistance fund won't be enough to cover your tuition.

What about doing an AAT course? These are cheaper and give you the same qualification as a degree at the end of it, they are also more well recognised than a degree in the industry.

grannycake Wed 11-Oct-17 11:18:26

How about looking for an apprenticeship route into Accounting - they definitely exist and you study on day release whilst working

BlueSapp Wed 11-Oct-17 11:18:43

ATT is only two years long instead of the three years at uni plus you'll already be in a job for those years.

Expemsiveuniform Wed 11-Oct-17 11:20:38

I’m also a bit agog that you didn’t find out the fees payment situation before you applied to be honest.

JWrecks Wed 11-Oct-17 11:24:26

Perhaps I've missed it, but can you not go through the legal paths to force your ex to pay maintenance? He can't simply decide to stop supporting his children, right? Am I missing something?

Flyingflipflop Wed 11-Oct-17 11:31:30

Just to add to the above about the AAT route.

It can actually be as quick or as slow as you want it to be. You can self study and rip through levels 2 and 3 quite quickly. Don't bother with 1 as it's so basic.

The books are £18 from BPP (other providers are available!) and exams about £70. To put it bluntly, for £900 roughly you can do level 2 and 3, plus AAT student joining fees.

I didn't bother with distance learning or anything as there are so many resources on line and Facebook pages for students it didn't seem worth it. The AAT site also has lots of resources on it.

I'm quite happy, if you want to PM me, to give any help I can.

nakedscientist Wed 11-Oct-17 11:37:59

You are entitled to 4 years student loan. If you have entered the 1st year (level 4) on a three year course you should be able to get the funding. If you did 2 years on the computing course, and getting a cert suggests you did then you will have only 2 years funding. You need to go for second year entry (level 5) onto a course that will accredit some of your prior learning. OR you can take the course part time and fund your final year yourself OR finish your original degree perhaps somewhere else, possibly part time.
Talk to the Uni, good luck.

gladyoucame Wed 11-Oct-17 11:38:49

I'm an ACA accountant and would definitely recommend AAT. You can study and work at the same time and gain valuable practical experience to support your study. I think accounting degrees exempt you from some parts of ACCA/CIMA, you can always go on to study ACCA/CIMA once you've qualified with AAT. I would rather employ an AAT studier for some of our entry level accounting roles. The experience you would gain while working and studying may put you ahead of a graduate with no relevant work experience in 3 years time for some roles.

senua Wed 11-Oct-17 11:44:27

A degree in Accounting does not make you an Accountant. There is still further study after that, assuming that someone will take you on as a trainee.
Much faster and cheaper to get AAT.

AnnieAnoniMouse Wed 11-Oct-17 12:04:30

I hope your meeting is going well, let us know how you got on.

tictoc76 Wed 11-Oct-17 12:07:56

Why do you need to go to uni to study accounting? You’re better off doing AAT, CIMA or something similar depending on what exactly you want to get into. I don’t think it costs much to self fund AAT and you can study evenings either distance learning or at a local college. Once you have AAT you should be able to get something in the field and get them to sponsor your studies to the next level.

Doesn’t help you with having fees due but hope you can sort something out with the uni about this

BeachyKeen Wed 11-Oct-17 12:10:32

Don't give up!

sillyrubberduck Wed 11-Oct-17 12:16:12

You need to go via AAT/ ACCA/ CIMA route. Degrees in Accountancy mean nothing without the professional qualifications. You also can gain invaluable experience by working while studying. A lot of companies would also pay for studying and exams.

EffieFuckingFairy Wed 11-Oct-17 12:59:56

Thanks for all the responses. I met with the advisor and she has said that until we have an official letter explaining the exact reason she cannot do anything to help at this moment. Hopefully I will here before the weekend and she made an app for Monday PM.

CotswoldStrife Yes in a nutshell. They said if I went on into Computing I could have had it funded.

Flyingflipflop and all those who mentioned AAT. I am an AAT student. With working the 30hrs (only changed to 16 hrs right at the end) plus the girls and everything else I just find it harder to commit to the course. I am almost done with Level 2 and needed to do my exams which I needed to find the money for.

The biggest biggest stress factor is childcare. I genuinely cannot afford holiday childcare. Every holiday/half term we argue as no one wants to help with childcare. the nearest holiday club is miles away the opposite way of where I worked. I dont drive and could not drop the girls off at the time I needed to before my work started. I did however try and begged friends. My friends have been amazing but I cannot rely on people who all have lives and for the last 2 years constantly have to help me out. Tomorrow I will probably read on here how someone might think I am taking the piss. SO as much as I appreciate it when I need the help this shouldn't be expected of them to always help.

My main aim for this was to concentrate on my girls. to work my ass off and be there when they need me. To be independent of my ex and his family. Doing the AAT plus working makes me dependent on them all. Honestly if I could put even a percentage of what he has done on here you will all be shocked. He also attempted suicide recently because I am moving on with my life. But this is not about him that is for another threat.

Guilty not 100% sure what you mean. I really do not want to do Computing.

Please understand I am not having a go at Student Finance and I understand. Its more that I questioned all of this before quitting my job and enrolling into Uni.

Grannycake I did apply for apprenticeships in April. Only got a call in September after I enrolled to say my CV was sent out and hopefully I will hear back soon. At that point I told them I got into Uni and would like to pursue that instead.

Expemsiveuniform I did mention in my OP that I did ask at Uni and Student Finance before applying and again before accepting the course.

Senua I am aware that I need to further exams and studying to get a CIMA or or ACCA.

Sorry my class will be starting soon so will reply after.

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