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DH refusing to hold my hand

(33 Posts)
remaincalm Mon 09-Oct-17 22:39:00

DH refuses to hold my hand when we are walking together. He says that it’s because his arms are longer than mine and it’s too uncomfortable to walk holding his hand up whilst holding mine. We are both pretty average height so I don’t think that hand holding should be a problem. AIBU to be annoyed that he will never hold my hand?

Namechangetempissue Mon 09-Oct-17 22:41:02

YABU. I hate holding hands and find in uncomfortable and annoying too. I adore my DH, I just don't feel the need to walk along attached to each other!

Elphame Mon 09-Oct-17 22:42:09

Yes me too. Our pace doesn't match and I find it really uncomfortable.

karalime Mon 09-Oct-17 22:47:05

Yabu I find handholding really uncomfortable unless you have the same length arms, one of you has to stoop.

Much easier to link arms and then hold hands in one of your pockets when it's cold.

trytobebestdad Mon 09-Oct-17 22:47:10

ill do it sometime but find it weird at other times, my wife often moans at me for not doing enough PDA.
just not my thing though, not a fan when other people do it
ps don't do it in dubai...

pictish Mon 09-Oct-17 22:48:58

Yabu if only because I hate holding hands. It's cumbersome and restrictive and often sweaty. Not my thing at all. Sorry.

lalalalyra Mon 09-Oct-17 22:49:43

I never hold hands with my DH as it's uncomfortable. There's over a foot and a half height difference between us.

It's also the reason I don't insist my kids hold hands.

Walk around with your hand at the angle he'd have to have his at for 30 mins and see if you still think he's being unreasonable.

remaincalm Mon 09-Oct-17 22:50:41

Looks like IABU (hangs her head in shame) oh dear 🤦🏻‍♀️

MrsMerryFestive Mon 09-Oct-17 22:51:22

We only hold hands if having a nice countryside stroll sans kids.

If I'm actually on my way to somewhere and have shit to be getting on with then hand holding is definitely not on.

deepestdarkestperu Mon 09-Oct-17 22:51:38

We’re the opposite! I hate it and DP loves it. I find I get sweaty palms and I don’t like being attached to someone when I’m walking along!

pictish Mon 09-Oct-17 22:54:42

It is quite uncomfortable to have to hold your hand (and therefore arm) up in order to hold someone else's. Hold hands on the sofa instead. x

Ilovechocolate111 Mon 09-Oct-17 22:55:55

I miss holding my husband hand. I only seem to push a pram these days lol very rare we hold each others hand my husband 6ft 1 and I'm 5 ft 5 and don't find in uncomfortable at all. So I don't think your being unreasonable 😀

Tatiana1986 Mon 09-Oct-17 22:55:57

Never in 13 years have me and my husband held hands whilst walking because he's not into it. I used to like it before I met him but now it would just feel weird to do so. And anyway, we're not six years old grin

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Mon 09-Oct-17 23:00:00

YANBU. I love holding hands with DH and would be rather upset if he didn't want to.

Flyinggeese Mon 09-Oct-17 23:10:34

Me and my partner often (for v short periods of time) hold hands while walking but it's one of those things that now I think about it has gone weird. It's a bit of an odd thing to do! We sometime also try to hold hands while lying in bed but then remember we're mismatched arm length wise and stop because it doesn't work.

Slimthistime Mon 09-Oct-17 23:12:21

I think YABU
it can be quite odd and uncomfortable

to the poster who said "don't do it in Dubai" - there's a ruddy great tourism ad for Dubai across the top of this page. I am the sort of person who would never go and doesn't travel much so I am puzzled to say the least!

fullofhope03 Mon 09-Oct-17 23:14:47

Oh OP! I don't think YBU - Think it's sweet and romantic and not uncomfortable at all x

ParanoidBeryl Mon 09-Oct-17 23:22:42

I have a chronic shoulder pain issue and I can't hold hands with DH. It used to be ok, but he would do this awful shaking my hand off vigorously if it was in public that was really painful on my shoulder. I'll never risk that pain again, so don't hold hands.

I adore holding hands with DS though. It is totally natural, his hands are so warm, and it fills my heart with joy.

OldPony Mon 09-Oct-17 23:22:45

I honestly couldn't be with someone if they didn't want to hold hands.

This is probably why I'm still single though!

KrytensNanobots Mon 09-Oct-17 23:23:29

Aw, I think it's nice to hold hands when out, so I get where you're coming from. smile
Me and DH still sometimes do and we've been together approx 20 years.
Sometimes we do, sometimes we don't.
We've learnt not to when out on a walk with the dc's though as they find it hilarious to shout "BEEP BEEP" and come crashing through the hand holding in fits of giggles. hmm grin

Jux Mon 09-Oct-17 23:28:21

Could you put your hand through his elbow? As it were.

backintown Mon 09-Oct-17 23:30:27

I live in a Uni town & all the students have decended in the last couple of weeks - I noticed as I was rushing about today just how many hold hands can't get past the blighters made me nostalgic for youth & young love (and the sweaty palm, slightly not in sync, achy arm awkwardness of it)! TBH though the only other time you see it is with unsteady old people or the sort of middle aged couples who wear matching fleeces! Also in reality it is sweaty and uncomfortable & annoying after 30 seconds of doing it so YABU ;)

PossiblyPFB Mon 09-Oct-17 23:34:54

YANBU I love holding hands with my husband!

fruitlovingmonkey Mon 09-Oct-17 23:37:16

Are you a dinosaur? If so, yabu.

augustusglupe Mon 09-Oct-17 23:48:58

This made me laugh, I’ve just shown DH, because he’s always grabbing my hand and I always pull my hand away. I find it uncomfortable, like I’m being led along and controlled. I’m not, but that’s how I feel. I’ve started to hold my handbag with both hands so he can’t grab my hand!!
He looks at other couples and says ‘well they’re holding hands’ and I go
‘Christ we’ve been married 30 years we’re hardly loves young dream’ I love him to death but have never got the hand holding thing.
I’m just not very touchy feely anyway. Me and DD are quite similar and we always do the same awkward hug that Edina and Saffy do in Ab Fab grin

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