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To not throw dd a birthday party this year?

(68 Posts)
anythingbuttypical Mon 09-Oct-17 10:45:35

Dd is turning 10 next month. She has had parties every year since she was 5. Ranging from extravagant and ridiculously expensive parties with the whole class to parties at home with a few friends. And everything in between.
I always said she would have parties in infants but stop once she was in juniors. The parties just carried on and she expects them.
To be honest. I can't be bothered. We are so over the whole party thing now. We've done it to death.
She has an expensive trip with school coming up this year which needs to be paid for by mid-dec so money is also a factor.

Aibu to not bother with a party this year? What can we do instead?

Slartybartfast Mon 09-Oct-17 10:46:15

cinema trip and meal with a few friends?

Gimmeareason Mon 09-Oct-17 10:47:59

Take her to church to reflect on her good fortune and follow up with a documentary on child refugees

2014newme Mon 09-Oct-17 10:50:08

Poor child! My dds are 10 next month we've various celebrations planned.
Why does celebrating and having a party end age 9 ffs?
Could she not even gave a couple of friends for tea? Sounds very harsh. It doesn't need to cost a lot.

dementedpixie Mon 09-Oct-17 10:50:34

Ds did laser tag with 1 friend (and dd). Bowling, cinema, dinner out?

BlueSuffragette Mon 09-Oct-17 10:51:09

Cinema and meal with friends can quicquickly become expensive. Have pizza at home and a sleep over for 3/4 friends in the lounge. Let them watch movies, eat chocolate eye stay awake talking til they eventually fall asleep. My daughter loved it. It was cheap, easy to tidy up and she felt like she has more responsibiluty/trust even though I was upstairs the whole time.

2014newme Mon 09-Oct-17 10:51:25

Also 'we' be done it to death' can't be true. It's once per year maximum, that's not doing something to death. You e done a maximum of 9 parties her whole life. Be kind.

BlueSuffragette Mon 09-Oct-17 10:52:37

* sorry spelling errors, phone having a fit

BrieAndChilli Mon 09-Oct-17 10:53:03

There’s a lot between a huge class extravaganza costing £500 and doing nothing!

Take a friend to the cinema (cheap weekend morning showing only costs a couple of quid)
Sleep over with a couple of friends, dvd and popcorn

Anything really as long as it involves a birthday cake at some point!!

ThePeanutGallery Mon 09-Oct-17 10:53:40

Can't you just do a sleepover and some pizza? At 10 it doesn't have to be a big party, but you should do something to celebrate. confused

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 Mon 09-Oct-17 11:02:35

gimme are you being serious or was you joking?

livefornaps Mon 09-Oct-17 11:03:20

Well of course she expects them - she 's 10 for God's sake! Do you want us all to call your child an entitled so and so?

I'm going to presume you just needed to rant and that you don't actually begrudge celebrating your own child's birthday and that you just want some ideas for cheaper parties (see above). Your tone is very negative though. Hope your daughter enjoys her birthday.

deepestdarkestperu Mon 09-Oct-17 11:03:59

I think 10 is a pretty big birthday for kids - double figures and all that.

Can you not do something small? Cinema/bowling with a couple of friends, and then McDonald's/Pizza Hut for tea, or a sleepover with her best friends, with popcorn and snacks?

I think doing nothing for her 10th birthday is a bit mean.

user1474550185 Mon 09-Oct-17 11:07:56

KungFuPanda I'm sure gimme was being quite serious. It's the same in my family. Once the kids are double digits then they're officially adults and ready to be put to work in the fields and learn about the horrible place the world is...

FakePlasticTeaLeaves Mon 09-Oct-17 11:09:11

Because you don't fancy doing it anymore, I agree, just do nothing. Don't even buy presents, too much effort. Maybe she could volunteer for the day, then she could be completely out of the way.

ErrolTheDragon Mon 09-Oct-17 11:09:23

A few friends at home, pizza, some sort of birthday cake, a good DVD, maybe a few silly games, maybe a sleepover. Fun without being expensive.

Dulra Mon 09-Oct-17 11:11:41

My dd turned 10 in August and we were away for it. We did a lot and spent a lot on the day of her birthday when we were on holidays so when we got back she was happy with a movie night at home with a few friends and cousins and we ordered in pizza for them and had a cake didn't cost much at all and they all had a ball

danTDM Mon 09-Oct-17 11:14:36

OP I absolutely agree. Where I live, it is the whole class and also, therefore, one a month at least. I am sick to death of it. Plus mothers and fathers come, it's ridiculous. A party for 14 triples and you have to cater for everyone.

If I do anything for my DD's 10th (and I agree it's a biggie) I might visit London or something.

I live in Spain. Thy don't know what a sleepover is. Far too protective to leave their daughters for a night. Wish it wasn't so. If I lived in the UK still, I'd do a sleepover if I were you.

HoneyIshrunkthebiscuit Mon 09-Oct-17 11:15:23

I think once they reach juniors birthdays should be replaced with silent reflection

5rivers7hills Mon 09-Oct-17 11:17:54

Birthday parties don't stop at infants! How mean. You 'can't be bothered' FFS.

I think 10 is a pretty big birthday for kids - double figures and all that.

^This

FakePlasticTeaLeaves Mon 09-Oct-17 11:18:24

@Honey Fantastic idea. I have a DC birthday next month, so will prep a reflection room accordingly.

LewisThere Mon 09-Oct-17 11:21:35

Of course she till wats them. And she still will as a teen too.

What needs to happen is to start changing the type of party she has. Atvtyat age, we've had a film/cinema followed by food and a sleepover. Friends back home by 10.00am the latest.
Both dcs always enjoyed that.

A b'day party doesn't have to be expensive. But it's a bit crap to not to do anything at all because YOU can't be bothered.

anythingbuttypical Mon 09-Oct-17 11:22:58

I never suggested I was going to do nothing. I was thinking we could do something as a family. Go bowling, out for tea, cinema, ice skating. Something like that but just the 5 of us.
I didn't expect anyone to say she is entitled hmm I was mearly stating that she has come to expect them every year.
By done to death, I mean we've got to the point where we will have to repeat a party as we've done everything she wants. And also with 3 kids yes parties have been done to death innthis house.
I did ask for your advice on an alternative. And yes I am serious.hmm

Yogagirl123 Mon 09-Oct-17 11:25:11

When my sons got to about about that age, I gave them a choice to either have a party or a meal out or weekend away as a family. They seemed to prefer this option. I wasn’t keen on birthday parties either OP, not that I let on to my DS’s, very hard work, many parents not even letting you know if their child was coming or not, lots of one up manship with entertainment, party bags etc. I don’t miss those days at all.

HoneyIshrunkthebiscuit Mon 09-Oct-17 11:27:20

faketrees make sure it is painted a suitable bland colour. Don't want to stimulate those over 10s minds too much.

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