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7 year old watching an 18?! AIBU

(90 Posts)
TheoandArchie Sun 08-Oct-17 21:20:53

I may sound completely unreasonable and I know it's not my child but it's absolutely insane to me!

My younger son is 7 and is in year 3. On Friday he came bounding up to me after school asking if he could watch Rambo. Obviously, I said no because it's not exactly a children's movie...
He said that his best friend, let's call him Johnny for reference, had watched it. I presumed that Johnny had maybe just heard about it and hadn't actually watched it (because what parent allows their 7 year old to watch incredibly violent 18s?)
But Johnny came over to play today and when his dad dropped him off, I asked him about it. Johnny's dad said that he'd 'only' seen the newest one and I was absolutely shocked. Apparently Johnny's older brother, who's only around 11, had watched and their dad allowed Johnny to as well.
I then made it clear that I didn't want my son watching any movies like that, as my son is having a sleepover at Johnny's next weekend.
I'm still a little unsure about actually letting him go round for the night! He's assured me that he'd ask before letting them watch anything but it just seems like a reflection on his actual parenting in my opinion... AIBU?

c3pu Sun 08-Oct-17 21:28:35

I don't let my 7yo watch 12a's, let alone anything stronger.

TheoandArchie Sun 08-Oct-17 21:37:03

Neither do I, but my son is really excited to go to his friend's house but I'm just not sure nowconfused

Jessikita Sun 08-Oct-17 21:40:53

Hmmm tough one.

We (my sister and I) were allowed to watch anything age thing on Tv when we were young. I don’t think my parents really thought about it.

We didn’t mind and turned out ok.
Some stuff did scare us though.

But he’s your child so you’re not being unreasonable and technically it’s against the law.

Ohyesiam Sun 08-Oct-17 21:51:31

Yes, I think he's not doing his job as a parent.
There was a warning on our school news letter this week reminding parents that Texas chain saw massacre, and some other violent movie were not suitable, and potentially harmful for primary children.

TheoandArchie Sun 08-Oct-17 21:55:51

Ohy I dont know if it would be fair for my son to not be able to have a sleepover at his best friend's though confused

SemiNormal Sun 08-Oct-17 21:59:29

YANBU but I'm thinking that the dad probably wouldn't be stupid enough to allow him to watch anything unsuitable now you've spoken with him. Although I do get your concerns that he may be lax in other ways regarding parenting. My son, also 7, came home from school when he was 6yrs old asking about Grand Theft Auto - I asked how he knew about it and he said a boy in his class plays it all the time hmm

NC4now Sun 08-Oct-17 21:59:35

I'm a bit iffy about letting my 15-year-old watch 18s. I know he does, but I don't encourage it.

Waytootiredtosleep Sun 08-Oct-17 21:59:38

Wow! My son turns 6 in a couple of weeks - he watched a u today and hid behind a pillow!!! I'd stretch to a PG!!! But NO WAY a 12 or 15 or 18!!!! Although I don't have a 7 year old yet, so maybe kids change more than I think in a year!! wink

annandale Sun 08-Oct-17 22:02:16

I would be nervous too - I never let ds watch 18 films and he's almost 14. He saw a 15 film at a friend's 14th party and I wasn't delighted, though I've left that one.

Invite the child to yours?

TheoandArchie Sun 08-Oct-17 22:04:38

Semi my son said Johnny plays grand theft auto, call of duty and all those sorts, which he knows he's not allowed to play. I haven't mentioned that to Johnny's dad but I definitely will as I don't want my son playing them either!

QueenUnicorn Sun 08-Oct-17 22:05:19

I had a friend put on Jurassic Park for my 2 year old, I was not impressed. the same friends 4 year old has watched 8 mile....

Waytootiredtosleep Sun 08-Oct-17 22:05:20

BTW, when I was 11 it was a craze to have sleep overs and watch 15 and 18's. TBH I was ok with most of the 18s that were violent, but I watched Polterguist which I think was 'just' a 15 at one of the sleepovers. I was terrified and had nightmares for ages afterwards. I still fear looking in mirrors at night (I'm nearly 40!!) and regret ever having watched the bloody film!! I was too young, my lack of sleep also didn't help my state of mind at the time, or all the scary stories my friends and I told during most of the sleep over parties. Although I'd never have admitted it at the time, I wish my mum had not let me go and watch the film. I would have been angry with her. But sometimes parents do know best and do have to say no to things!

Viserion Sun 08-Oct-17 22:05:21

technically it’s against the law

No it's not. BBFC ratings only apply to licensed cinemas. In the privacy of a home, it is entirely up to the family to decide what is age appropriate for their child.

TheoandArchie Sun 08-Oct-17 22:07:04

Ann I think at a 14tg party a 15 isn't too bad but an 18 for a 7 year old is insane to me!
And about the friend coming to mine, they've don't that many times before and my son is so excited to go and I don't want him to be upset ):

StopCopyingMyUsername Sun 08-Oct-17 22:07:59

There was a warning on our school news letter this week reminding parents that Texas chain saw massacre, and some other violent movie were not suitable, and potentially harmful for primary children

Whether the school is right or wrong this kind of thing fucking annoys me. My children's old primary school sent newsletters out telling parents and carers what websites their children can and can't look at at home. It's up to parents and carers what their children do at home not the school who should stick to educating in school hours and mind their own business otherwise. It's patronizing as fuck and not their place to try and boss other adults around in their own homes

SparklyLeprechaun Sun 08-Oct-17 22:09:04

A bit of an overreaction not letting him go to the sleepover. The dad has promised to check what movies he's allowed to watch, end of story.

For the record, I watched Rambo when I was about 10, I was fine, and my parents were good, caring parents. DD is 7 and loves martial arts movies, they are generally 12 or 15, I've got no problem with her watching them but I wouldn't put them on if she had guests.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Sun 08-Oct-17 22:09:10

I accidentally let my 6 year old watch a 12 the other day, I was mortified! No way would I let him watch an 18 and yes I would judge those that do. Good on you for saying in advance that you wouldn't allow it, hopefully they will remember and take note.

In your situation I would allow this sleepover to go ahead but no more if they let him watch something inappropriate this time!

pp2017 Sun 08-Oct-17 22:11:55

YANBU at all!

I really don’t know what goes through some parents heads.....

My DS is 10, all his friends have an 18 rated game for their xboxes and when they’re all online talking to each other they’re all playing the game together while my DS has to listen in while playing something else on his own....

Breaks my heart that he’s left out (sometimes they actually kick him out of the “party” so that he can’t even join in talking to them) but I absolutely refuse to let him have an 18 game.

Nanny0gg Sun 08-Oct-17 22:11:57

The parents obviously don't mind what their children watch or play. That attitude will extend to visitors.

If you don't want your 7 year-old playing GTA or watching 18s then he'd better not go.

CorbynsBumFlannel Sun 08-Oct-17 22:12:31

I’d be really uneasy with my child going there tbh. They’ll probably be wanting to go on the PlayStation/XBox and I wouldn’t be surprised if he has unrestricted internet on an iPad either. Far too much potential for your son to be exposed to stuff he shouldn’t be.
What is your ds like? Will he speak up and say he’s not allowed to play 18 rated games for eg?

ElspethTascioni Sun 08-Oct-17 22:12:52

Bonkers to allow a 7 year old to watch an 18! My 14 year old I let watch most 15s, but not 18s! My 10 year old I let watch 12s, but no way a 15. And I won't have GTA or COD in the house.

My 3 year old has seen all the Jurassic Park films though...but she loves dinosaurs and seems completely unconcerned by them 😬 She hasn't really seen any other films either...

ElspethTascioni Sun 08-Oct-17 22:14:00

And yes, I'd be concerned about my 7 year old going over given their lack of judgment

Ellieboolou27 Sun 08-Oct-17 22:14:58

waytootired I was coming on to say the same!!! Must be a generational thing as im a similar age, I was also allowed to watch evil dead too, still plays in my mind.

Op you are not unreasonable at all, age restrictions are there for a reason and I'm far from precious.

Twoweekcruise Sun 08-Oct-17 22:15:37

Our 7 year old dneice has been allowed to play GTA from the age of 4 and now swears like a trooper, nice!

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