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To call 101?

(159 Posts)
NachoAddict Sun 08-Oct-17 17:47:45

I have an elderly neighbour who i cook for just once a week on sunday. This has been going on for 2 years. Its my way of checking he is ok.

The last few wewks he has mentioned his health is deteriorating but he is seeing his doctor.

Today I knocked with his dinner at 4, couldnt get an answer so I shouted through is he ok? He said yes he is fine leave his dinner on the wall.

I left it there for an hoyr then knocked again, he didnt answer but shouted that he is ok, he will be out soon he us just going to have a shower.
That was almost an hour ago. Still no sign of him.

Would I be unreasonable to ring 101 to do a welfare check even though he is saying he is fine? I just keep thinking he might have had a fall and be too proud to say.

In the two years he has never not had his dinner.

TheNext Sun 08-Oct-17 17:49:15

Yes, please get someone to check. he is so lucky to have you as a neighbour flowers

trolleyknockers Sun 08-Oct-17 17:49:35

Yes please do .

Sirzy Sun 08-Oct-17 17:50:11

If he is responding saying he is fine I doubt there is much 101 would do.

Someone would have to be very proud to not ask for help for hours after a fall surely?

NachoAddict Sun 08-Oct-17 17:52:31

Thats what wprries me Sirzy tgat the police would just say well he said he is fine.

It is so out of character though. He is not answering his phone either as the previous owners of this house are my exMil and ex Sil and they phone him every sunday.

He didnt put his bin out this week either which he always does. Obviously I did it for him but its just not like him.

mummyofmoomoos Sun 08-Oct-17 17:52:49

Glad he has you! Yes to calling 101, better safe than sorry- hoping all is well flowers

NachoAddict Sun 08-Oct-17 17:53:04

Sorry typos my phone is awful to type on.

VivienneWestwoodsKnickers Sun 08-Oct-17 17:53:30

Please ring 101. He may be too proud to let you see how he is. They will get in one way or another. If you're worried about undermining him, tell him you're going to call them if he can't come to the door.

mirren3 Sun 08-Oct-17 17:55:46

Definitely phone 101, I work with the elderly and often they are too proud to ask for help, also work closely with the Police, they would much rather do a welfare check than having to inform relatives etc of a sudden death or accident that could have been prevented.

Sirzy Sun 08-Oct-17 17:55:47

Maybe go back and specially tell him your worried so going to phone and see what he says?

JoWithABow Sun 08-Oct-17 17:55:59

Can you say something to him before you call? Eg, Ive noticed youve not had your dinner, thats unlike you, im worried youve had a fall? I'm going to call 111/101 whatever it is to come and check on you to make sure you are ok. Then see what he says?

DereksGotATail Sun 08-Oct-17 17:57:24

No. This isn't a police matter.
Has he got any family? Does anyone have a key? Have you asked him why he isn't coming to the door or have you told him that you're worried about him?

existentialmoment Sun 08-Oct-17 17:59:08

a welfare check is not for someone that you have talked to and who has told you, twice, that they are fine.

JoWithABow Sun 08-Oct-17 18:00:19

Derek, police do go round when elderly people arent answering the door, or havent been seen for a few days. I know this is slightly different because he has spoken through the door but the police still might help. The other idea could be wait until morning then call his GP maybe?

calamityjam Sun 08-Oct-17 18:02:48

Does he have any family you can call? Can you insist that he let's you in for a few minutes to check on him? Does he have carers, or if he doesn't can you find out if he might be entitled to them? I used to work as a carer and for some clients we used to do a daily welfare check. They didn't require care per say, but they did need someone to pop in daily to make sure that everything was OK, check they had been eating, that they had adequate food, heating, meds etc. I would sit and have a cuppa and a chat.

blueskyinmarch Sun 08-Oct-17 18:03:39

You could call the social work out of hours team. They would do a welfare check.

Gribbie Sun 08-Oct-17 18:04:40

Please do. If one of my mums friends hadn’t persisted trying to get my mum to open the door and eventually called the police she wouldn’t be here. She was very ill with sepsis and was in hospital for weeks and weeks.

Davenotdave Sun 08-Oct-17 18:08:49

Poor bloke, you're a good neighbour checking in on him, so many don't have people like you.
Police will do a welfare check, but it will only be knocking and checking, though he might be more likely to come to the door (if he can), or admit that he can't.
Do you have any of his relatives contact details? Can you knock and tell him you're worried and want to check he's OK? Or pretend you want to borrow something maybe, so that he'll need to come to the door.

NachoAddict Sun 08-Oct-17 18:11:22

Well I rang 101 and the policeman said they can't help, if I think he has fallen then I should call an ambulance.

I have knocked again and asked has he fallen and he said no he is ok. I said is he coming for his dinner he said yes he will be down in a minute. He said that an hour ago too.

Its only because it is so out of the ordinary that I am so worried.

ProfessorCat Sun 08-Oct-17 18:13:01

Tell him that you're worried and will be willing to call someone if he's poorly or hurt. It might be enough to get him to answer to at least you.

insancerre Sun 08-Oct-17 18:13:12

Go round again and tell him you need to come in because you are worried about him
Tell him if he doesn't let you in you are going to phone the police

NachoAddict Sun 08-Oct-17 18:13:21

Oh and no he has literally no family. No one has a key.

He doesnt have carers, he usually get out and about, looks after himself bit I haven't seen him in the mornings this week. I heard him answer the door to someone this week though, I think that was Friday.

MumsOnCrack Sun 08-Oct-17 18:13:47

I’d be tempted to tell him if he cannot come to the door you’ll have to call someone. See what response that gets but I’d be tempted to gain access at the very least. Maybe get a key for the future?

Sirzy Sun 08-Oct-17 18:14:32

When this is sorted please discuss with him making sure someone has a spare key - this is why everyone who lives alone should give someone locally a key just incase

insancerre Sun 08-Oct-17 18:14:48

If you get in ask him for a spare key
Tell him it's for emergencies

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