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To think some children ARE just naughty?

(218 Posts)

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Dancingfairy Sun 08-Oct-17 12:27:01

I'm sick of every time a child is naughty people say they "probably have autism" my daughter has autism and isn't badly behaved at all, (violent etc) is it just me who notices this?! Naughty behaviour doesn't equal autism, just frustrated with it getting a bad name! Aibu in thinking some children ARE just naughty?

PaperdollCartoon Sun 08-Oct-17 12:29:08

You're not wrong. Yes we're better at diagnosing things now in children who would have just been labelled naughty before, but some kids are just naughty and need better parenting.

gamerchick Sun 08-Oct-17 12:30:54

I have one with autism as well. He can be violent, he gets labeled as naughty while out and about. I’ve lost count of the times people have wanted me to whack him for it and autism didnt exist in their day.

Bumdishcloths Sun 08-Oct-17 12:31:02

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gigi556 Sun 08-Oct-17 12:31:38

Some kids definitely are just naughty. They probably need more sleep and a better diet.

Blahblahboo Sun 08-Oct-17 12:32:47

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Usernamegone Sun 08-Oct-17 12:33:18

YANBU. I have a cousin with autism. He is not badly behaved or naughty. If fact he is a dream to spend time with and well behaved and polite.

Butterymuffin Sun 08-Oct-17 12:34:22

Yes, I often think it's insulting to kids with autism and other conditions, many of whom try really hard under difficult circumstances to cope with situations but get stereotyped as the exemplar for 'naughty' children.

It's also deeply annoying when someone posts about their dick of a husband/partner and you get 'maybe he's on the spectrum?' replies. As if that's the cause of all crap male behaviour ever. Nope, some are just dicks!

CorbynsBumFlannel Sun 08-Oct-17 12:34:23

Yabu imo. Of course most kids misbehave but if you're talking about severe challenging behaviour and aggression there is always a reason for this which is either disability or neglect.

MrsA2015 Sun 08-Oct-17 12:34:36

Yes some are just little shits and ruin everything.

TheStoic Sun 08-Oct-17 12:35:02

The pendulum has swung the other way.

The challenging behaviour of kids with special needs used to be labelled as just ‘naughty’. Now, kids with ‘naughty’ behaviour are labelled as having special needs.

LakieLady Sun 08-Oct-17 12:36:37

Yes, DSS was a complete little shit until long after he started school. He was the worst toddler I've ever met - so willful and wouldn't put up with anything he didn't want or tolerate not getting what he wanted.

He got better and better though, and has turned out to be a lovely adult - kind, responsible, caring, clever and very principled.

arethereanyleftatall Sun 08-Oct-17 12:39:19

Yanbu.

WorraLiberty Sun 08-Oct-17 12:39:36

Some kids definitely are just naughty. They probably need more sleep and a better diet.

That's a good point actually.

You rarely hear anyone on MN suggesting that, rather than suggesting some sort of SN.

CorbynsBumFlannel Sun 08-Oct-17 12:41:00

It does depend on what you mean by 'naughty' though. Is class violent behaviour as more than just being naughty.

YellowMakesMeSmile Sun 08-Oct-17 12:41:19

Of course some children are just naughty, poor parenting, neglect etc obviously plays a part.

Blaming it on SEN is too easy and excuses the behaviour almost not to mention the parenting.

gamerchick Sun 08-Oct-17 12:45:21

The only reason it is so fashionable is because you get benefits if your child is classed as disabled or something and that was the schools thinking as to.why they kept insisting he had a condition

Yes I just think of that when getting things chucked at my head. Lovely benefits grin

reallyorange Sun 08-Oct-17 12:46:39

I'm sick of every time a child is naughty people say they "probably have autism"

You'll always get some people asking you to consider this possibility. You'll always get some people saying they are just naughty. It's ridiculous to claim that "everyone" says one thing or the other. If more people are considering SN before labelling naughty children then I don't think that's a bad thing.

Puzzledandpissedoff Sun 08-Oct-17 12:48:14

But yes, some kids are just poorly behaved, and I find ESPECIALLY on MN people are very quick to suggest SEN, or in the case of anyone over 50, dementia

Thank goodness it's not just me

I'm another who's raised a lad with quite severe SN ... and I took the view that he has enough problems as it is, without being a brat as well

BertieBotts Sun 08-Oct-17 12:48:26

I was ready to say yabu, I don't think any child is 'just naughty', behaviour happens for a reason, but yeah, it's not on to label every little thing as autism, it gives autism a bad name.

HalloweenStar Sun 08-Oct-17 12:50:43

gamerchick is right

and what kind of prejudice is that for a school to come out with

this is one of the reasons I don't like teachers

LoverOfCake Sun 08-Oct-17 12:51:31

On MN almost any behaviour is excused by something. If a child is a bully they either have SN or need help or MH issues. If a child is violent they have SN. Have just seen the ultimate where a child has been stealing another child's lunch and this should be excused because maybe the family are in poverty and he's either seriously hungry or neglected.

We need to start acknowledging that while some conditions may be the cause of certain challenging behaviours, not all challenging behaviours are because of certain conditions.

TheStoic Sun 08-Oct-17 12:52:25

I find it kind of weird that a parent of a child with special needs would be so quick to label another child as ‘naughty’.

WhereTheFuckIsWonderWoman Sun 08-Oct-17 12:52:42

I hate children being labelled as naughty. Behaviour is a form of communication and if something's going wrong for a child sometimes the only way they have of expressing themselves is through disruptive behaviour i.e. "I'm not ok, could someone please notice and make it ok". Yes, this problem could be lack of sleep or decent diet, in which case the parenting might need looking at.
The child isn't 'naughty', they're looking for help. But they don't realise it.

Dancingfairy Sun 08-Oct-17 12:54:05

I'm mainly talking violent and aggressive behaviour. it came after reading this www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/horrified-mum-claims-teachers-locked-11305092?ICID=FB_mirror_main on a Facebook group and people coming along saying "must be autism" it's not just this though. I see it all the time and it's frustrating! The news article doesn't even mention autism. Just sick of my daughter being put in the same category as children like this.

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