Hello,
I'm asking for advice as I'm a bit stuck as to where to go from here.
My friend of a good number of years recently left her partner who was quite abusive and controlling, and a heavy class A drug user. She has a son with him and a daughter from a previous relationship. Following the split she was housed in emergency accommodation which was not a very nice environment for her or the children.
Myself and other friends were very supportive before and after the split, she and the kids stayed at our houses before she got the accommodation, we babysat, took them out for the day, and tried to help her keep some normality.
My parents have recently bought a house to let out to supplement their pension, and by good fortune it was available at the time that she needed a permanent home. Unfortunately she did not have the money for a deposit.
I lent her the money (just shy of £500), as I didn't want her to have to stay in the temp. accommodation with her children as they had been through so much already. I helped her move in and get settled, and my parents have been very forgiving in terms of giving her furniture items that she needed.
Since she moved in it has been virtual radio silence from her, she has not answered calls or messages from myself or friends and I have also found out that she was 2 weeks late on her first rent payment to mum and dad, which is causing them some stress - and probably regret that they seem to have an awkward tenant in when I had vouched for her character as a friend.
After cold-calling at her house and messaging her sister to ask if she was alright (said friend had managed to post status updates and profile pictures on facebook however, despite not replying to any of us) she eventually messaged me to see what was up.
I replied saying I was a little concerned about her lack of contact with me and asked if she had had any joy with the deposit.
Friend stated that the council have said they only pay in arrears and she should not have paid the deposit in the first place. She said she would try to get the money together for me 'one way or the other' but did not give any indication on time scales.
Since then I have messaged again and have had no reply.
I really am torn here, I'm quite upset about the £500 because it was a big chunk of my personal savings and now I'm not sure if i will ever see it again. I'm also worried that I have got my parents into a mess with a tenant that isn't reliable, and I can't 'call her out' on anything in case it jeopardizes Mum and Dad's house.
I'm also sad about the potential loss of a good friend...
And think it's quite likely that she has begun using drugs as this was happening in her last relationship.
Any advice would be appreciated.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
To ask for my money back from friend?
82 replies
ladyface69 · 07/10/2017 13:32
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.