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To hate men saying "we" are pregnant?

(96 Posts)
brasty Thu 05-Oct-17 19:13:58

Or even worse, just watching an interview where a male actor said when "I" was pregnant. No he is not Trans. His female partner was pregnant. Yes you are having a baby together, but only the woman is pregnant.

HundredMilesAnHour Thu 05-Oct-17 19:15:59

Totally agree. "We" are having a baby but "we" aren't pregnant.

ILoveMillhousesDad Thu 05-Oct-17 19:16:49

I've never heard any man say this irl. Only ever on programmes where they are poking fun at the men that say it.

MrsDustyBusty Thu 05-Oct-17 19:17:40

Absolutely. It's a big change for men, sure, but why do they need to pretend they are actually pregnant to engage?

Tara336 Thu 05-Oct-17 19:17:55

my pet hate!

stopbeingadramallama Thu 05-Oct-17 19:17:59

Yes, I find this weird.
"We are having a baby" not "we are pregnant"

TowerRavenSeven Thu 05-Oct-17 19:18:49

Yanbu!

Taratill Thu 05-Oct-17 19:18:51

Yep I've heard it but only from the pregnant woman. I think it's a bit twee. The man is most certainly not pregnant.

MyBrilliantDisguise Thu 05-Oct-17 19:18:51

It's worse when they say, "We're not having any pain relief during labour."

MumsOnCrack Thu 05-Oct-17 19:19:34

I find it weird but surely it’s preferable for the man to take some responsibility and ownership instead of just saying their wife is pregnant. I feel like it comes from a positive change where men are expected to do more.

expatinscotland Thu 05-Oct-17 19:19:35

YANBU

TurnipCake Thu 05-Oct-17 19:20:08

MyBrilliant oh yes, and "We are hyponobirthing"

breakabletoy Thu 05-Oct-17 19:20:21

I don't like it either.

I understand this phrasing is meant to make the man feel more involved, but sorry! You're not pregnant and never will be.

They should come up with new and different terminology for themselves to recognise the role of men who actively support their partners through pregnancy.

cushioncovers Thu 05-Oct-17 19:20:32

Yep I agree op

user1488622199 Thu 05-Oct-17 19:21:11

My husband says this. Every time he says this I wonder where my life went wrong

MrsDustyBusty Thu 05-Oct-17 19:23:05

I feel like it comes from a positive change where men are expected to do more.

I don't agree. I think it comes from a place where pregnancy is not acknowledged as a big deal so women shouldn't expect any special consideration.

TitsalinaBumSqoosh Thu 05-Oct-17 19:23:21

When I was having my first child with my ex, his friend exclaimed "what have you done Tits, you've made my best friend pregnant!"

Er no Dickhead, that's not how it works! hmm

MyPatronusIsAUnicorn Thu 05-Oct-17 19:24:50

YADNBU!

I HATE this. No, WE are not pregnant, the WOMAN only is pregnant. WE are having a baby,myes. It's the same as saying we are having a vasectomy (never heard anyone say this but that would be just the same except no one would say it because it wrong and just downright stupid so same logic should apply to WE are pregnant).

BitOfANameChange Thu 05-Oct-17 19:26:17

MyBrilliantDisguise Thu 05-Oct-17 19:18:51

It's worse when they say, "We're not having any pain relief during labour."

I agree. I've heard this a few times, and generally I feel it's the bloke driving this. I did once speak to the woman and say she'd have been better not to make a firm decision until she was actually going through the process, as she'd be better able to judge. Her dh piped up and said "but we've made a decision already". I pointed out to him that his DW was the patient and her opinion was the only one that mattered. I also mentioned that noboy gave out medals for birthing without pain relief.

OK, I admit I was probably being UR there, but there was something about him and his attitude that really rubbed me up the wrong way. I'll probably stick to rolling my eyes in future and letting the MW educate the DH.

LovelyPrep Thu 05-Oct-17 19:28:48

Yanbu. Also men telling their partners what pain relief and type of birth they want them to have. Just infuriating.

OnTheSherry Thu 05-Oct-17 19:29:12

Really abhor this, too.

'We're pregnant'
'We had a natural birth'
'We're breastfeeding exclusively'

I heard al of these phrases come out of the mouth of a complete dickhead guy once (husband of a colleague). I felt like saying 'Oh, she didn't tell me that you both had a fourth degree tear'.

Prick.

NauticalDisaster Thu 05-Oct-17 19:31:09

My ex insisted on saying we were pregnant and became upset when I didn't say it too. He was and is a wanker.

stardust18 Thu 05-Oct-17 19:32:29

Totally agree, it gets on my wick when men say that.

stitchglitched Thu 05-Oct-17 19:33:08

YANBU. Just makes me think they are attention seeking idiots who can't even bear to let pregnancy be about the woman without muscling in and making it all about them.

tippz Thu 05-Oct-17 19:33:36

It is weird. And inaccurate.

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