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To perform an auto-tonsillectomy ???

(71 Posts)
QueenNefertitty Mon 02-Oct-17 20:34:36

Got tonsillitis from DS, who's been suffering for a couple of weeks (he's just one, it's been rotten).

Went back to work at a new company post maternity leave today, and sure enough, that familiar scratchy scouring feeling began up by my inner ear/ tonsil.

It's probably bacterial (as his is) so will need to get some ABs at some point (when? When is there time?!) but am thinking far easier to just remove them myself with a melon baller or similar.

What do you think?

elfycat Mon 02-Oct-17 20:39:13

Tonsils bleed... a lot

<theatre nurse>

go see a pharmacist.

whyareusernamessodifficult Mon 02-Oct-17 20:42:04

You’re being sarcastic, yeah?

x2boys Mon 02-Oct-17 20:43:32

I get bacterial tonsillitis alot a couple of days of penicillan and im loads better much easier surely?

SunnySkiesSleepsintheMorning Mon 02-Oct-17 20:45:35

YANBU, I’m sure you could find a video on YouTube to show you how to do it. Can I watch?

Or alternatively, sending much sympathy. flowers

oldlaundbooth Mon 02-Oct-17 20:46:09

Good one.


flutterby12 Mon 02-Oct-17 20:49:04

You'll bleed like a pig. Don't do it.

MagnumAddict Mon 02-Oct-17 20:50:35

Much sympathy for your son and you! Had mine removed years ago thank goodness or I'd have been reaching for the melon baller too grin

frogsoup Mon 02-Oct-17 20:53:10

Eerm, the op is not serious!!!! Should that really need pointing out?!!

FloofyDoof Mon 02-Oct-17 20:55:13

Try one of the online doctor services maybe? I think you can do an online consultation and have your medication next day. Not sure of cost, but I know a friend has used one when desperate.

SunnySkiesSleepsintheMorning Mon 02-Oct-17 20:56:01

We used to be able to understand sarcasm on MN, what happened?!

CaptainMarvelDanvers Mon 02-Oct-17 20:57:46

Bacterial Tonsillitis is awful. I get it every few years and every time I think I will let the body fight the infection off and brave my way through it until day 4, when they've swollen to the max and I'm drooling because it's so painful to swallow. I drool so much, a St Bernard would be jealous.

I so sensitive about getting it that even a slight tinge in my throat I gargle with TCP, I'm also a regular checker for tonsil stones.

Redcrayons Mon 02-Oct-17 20:58:01

It needs to be sterile. slosh some vodka over it first. I saw it on casualty.

(In the unlikely event that you are serious, er don't).

sparechange Mon 02-Oct-17 20:58:03

I feel you, OP

I’ve spent many a night, lying wide awake in agony and wondering if I can loop dental floss around them until they shrivel and die and fall off, like with skin tags

PandorasXbox Mon 02-Oct-17 21:02:14

Christ as if anyone thought the OP meant it.

Ivy79 Mon 02-Oct-17 21:05:12

OMG! shock

I can lend you these if you want! grin


Hope you feel better soon. smile

SandunesAndRainclouds Mon 02-Oct-17 21:07:05

Peroxyl is your friend.... it is utterly vile and fizzes on the bacteria but kills the little fuckers and should be slightly safer than a melon baller.

sparechange Mon 02-Oct-17 21:15:58

I saw a history programme once where they looked at old surgical instruments

They had a tonsil remover. It was a bit like a cigar cutter.
DH has got an old cigar cutter in the kitchen Drawer of Doom which I can pop in the post, if it would be any use?

Sooooooooooooooooooooo Mon 02-Oct-17 21:28:10

I'm sure there's a you tube video telling you how to do it. Couple of spoons should do.

BeALert Mon 02-Oct-17 22:02:46

Read the Outlander book where she does a tonsillectomy.

With that info in hand I'm sure it'll all be fine :-D

QueenNefertitty Tue 03-Oct-17 15:36:20

Oh god I didn't think anyone would think I was serious?!

just here for a whinge about the FUCKING HORRENDOUS pain of those two fleshy little lumps really.

Also now feeling bloody awful for baby DS who suffered for 2 weeks before the infection made him so unwell he was admitted to hospital, before any doctor would even contemplate antibiotics.

Misery upon misery in this house! (But no surgery. Promise).

QueenNefertitty Tue 03-Oct-17 15:37:42

Also many thanks for all equipment suggestions. If things get really dark I may change my mind and give it a go after all...

viques Tue 03-Oct-17 15:48:59

don't forget you should eat hard stuff like toast or cornflakes afterwards!

A tonsil survivor.

(though I was only about 3 so my post operative memories may be hazy, and inaccurate.)

NotAPuffin Tue 03-Oct-17 15:53:32

No, you're right, viques, they made me eat scratchy stuff too, the sadistic feckers. I was 12.

I once posted asking how to decapitate myself when I had sinusitis. I think I was joking.

Spuddington Tue 03-Oct-17 15:55:38

I can't believe you're taking advice. crayons has got it dangerously wrong.

It's gin, not vodka.


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