I work as a HCP and the last few weeks have been horrendous. I was hit badly at work a few weeks ago which set off an existing condition in my shoulder (aggravated AC joint). I then had to have a few days off due to concussion.
My first shift back was today and I was spat at, hit, had a hot drink and a remote control thrown at me, threatened with stabbing and called every name under the sun...by the same person who happened to hurt me the other week.
This person has dementia and I try every technique I know (and I know a few...been doing the job a long time now and hold a Senior position) but nothing calms this person, nothing works... I just feel it must be me!! I have to say this person has been checked for a UTI etc so all clear on that score.
But I engage really well with every other person I look after to the point that the majority gave me such huge smiles this afternoon when I came back because although they don't remember me as such, they remember the happy emotions they feel when I'm around - so I don't know.
Anyway. I get paid minimum wage to be practically physically attacked and verbally abused, risk my mental and physical health and I guess my AIBU would be... would I be wrong to quit my job and change career completely but let down the great staff I work with and more importantly the other amazing people I look after??
I was shaking after work tonight because I'd basically had to give this person 1-1 care to ensure they didn't fall and hurt themselves or other people, but in doing so I was physically hurt and had to listen to the most horrendous things. I'm just fed up and my family are seriously worried.
I also worked in a hospital so have seen some really traumatic things but even that didn't make me feel like this.
Sorry I'm rambling now so I'll leave it there.
AIBU?
But can I just really hate my job right now??
StewPots · 01/10/2017 21:20
You poor thing. I don't think you should be expected to provide 1:1 care for someone who severely assaulted you.
I work in mental health and I would support staff being moved for the duration of a patient being there if they are being personally targeted and at risk. I know it can feel like a punishment being moved, but in reality, it's much harder to move the patient these days in Most areas.
You do have my absolute sympathy. It's so horrible to be targeted and it can feel personal even though it most likely isn't. I've been kicked in the chest, kicked on the arm which was more painful than it sounds, punched multiple times, and targeted for horrific verbal abuse in the last few months. Mental health can be such a challenging area to work in
I'm an RMN, I think it's much harder for HCA's as you are paid so much less!
I feel for you. I'm a HCP professional too but luckily I work in a well supported environment.
I think you've answered your own question, in that it's too stressful for you now- I can't imagine having to work in an environment where I didn't safe on top of the "normal"
pressures of the healthcare system these days.
You must have loads of transferable skills you can use in another area, you need to look after you as sadly nothing is likely to change 
Stewpots - you have my thanks and my admiration for the work you do, and that's not just me paying lip service to you. A few years ago I walked out of the home I worked in and never went back after just completely breaking down on shift. I'd been punched, kicked, bitten, spat at and fingernails removed from my arm when they snapped after being embedded in the flesh of my arm when I stood between 2 clients who were fighting. Still got the scars.
I had to get out, for my physical and mental health.
Let me stress here that it absolutely wasn't the clients and their illnesses, but rather the fact that many are wrongly placed, by ss, and it can take 6 months to get someone moved to a more appropriate facility. Ss are very reluctant to move someone requiring more care because of funding, home owners are reluctant to voluntarily free up a bed (and the money that brings!) So the client stays, doesn't get the care they need and other clients, visitors and staff get the fall out. And then the blame when something goes seriously wrong.
It was constantly not being able to actually care for people because of being so short staffed, it was the institutional abuse that rose because of lack of equipment, lack of staff and lack of money. It was the whole cultural shift towards care workers expecting physical and verbal abuse, low wages and the disdain of society by being told you shouldn't be in it for the money. Well even care workers have bills to pay. While most aren't in it for the money (it's crap) the owners in general are. And that's the root problem. Care is run as a business and clients and staff suffer while the owners cream the profit of the funds paid to provide a service they don't actually provide.
Good care workers (like you sound OP) ate leaving because it's too much.
Your manager should be drawing a plan on how this person can be managed better without the massive impact it's already having. No one should have to put up with being hurt repeatedly at work, it doesn't hurt any less because the perpetrator is ill, it means it's not their fault but someone, higher than you, needs to take some responsibility for this situation.
Only you can know if leaving care is the right thing to do, I went back into hotel/catering and a real plus is the communication skills I learned in care, along with more tolerance than most of my colleagues for awkward customers.
I really feel for you OP
Beerwench thank you interestingly I left hospitality because I wanted to go back to caring and take my skills to the next level. But sadly due to the things I've had to deal with in the past few years I know I won't have the patience for just regular complaints. That sounds crazy but thinking back what I used to sort out for customers on the floor...having now seen serious stuff, literally life and death situations, I would feel it was all petty which of course it isn't but it wouldn't be fair to customers to think that way about them.
I think you are right about most homes but I'm lucky in that Ido have a great and supportive boss - with the shoulder thing she made sure I documented it in the accident book as well as the usual places and has ensured behaviour charts etc are being done on this person so we can get a thorough medication review and see if things need tweaking.
We are a happy place with enthusiastic and caring staff, but it is obviously stressful especially at teatime - classic sundownings applies as we are an EMI home. But due to this one person and the domino effect it causes distress and more running about trying to calm everything and stop situations escalating or a vulnerable person being hurt. That's what scares me is that the next time this person lashes out, it may result in a vulnerable person being seriously hurt and then we all know how that will go down.
I've just had enough...I don't get paid enough to be treated like this every shift when all I do is try and care for people and keep them safe from harm...surely that's the reason I get out of bed every morning because it surely isn't due to the pay! I would earn triple in hospitality yet it wasn't emotionally rewarding so I went back to Healthcare. And now I feel broken.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.