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To feel really despondent

(3 Posts)
QueenNefertitty Tue 26-Sep-17 10:39:04

I've posted a few threads about getting back on my feet post split with exDP.

Well I found a job, and a nursery for DS, and we'd started settling him in, and I was due to start my job on Monday coming (giving me this week to settle DS into nursery).

DS has been poorly with a generic virus for a couple of weeks- so nursery settling hasn't been going well- and last night he had diarrhoea with mucusy blood in it. So off to a&e we go (he's only just one, his temp was 40, there was blood. It was justified).

He has tonsillitis-quite likely for a little while- and possibly another bacterial infection in his gut. (It's definitely not the intessusception thingy.). He's seen THREE doctors with various new symptoms this week,who all checked him, and not one of them saw the tonsils were infected.

Now nursery settling can't be done until he's better, and I can't start my job until he's at nursery- the role is time sensitive and project based so calling them to delay means they may well have to rescind the offer.

If they do this, I can't rent the beautiful house I've found, as it was dependant on my having this particular job (explaining why is outing, but the two things are linked).

I know I'm catastrophising, but just so worried about DS' health, AND how on earth im going to keep hold of this job and house, that we so desperately need. Currently living with DM and she's intimated that she's finding having DS and I in her house more disruptive than she'd expected when she told us to come live here.

A week ago, apart from DS being a bit grizzly, it felt like life was going to turn a huge corner. Today I feel like it's hanging on a knife edge.

I've dealt with postnatal anxiety and OCD too this year, so moments like this can feel hugely unsettling - possibly why I'm totally overreacting.

Someone come tell me to give my head a shake and just get on with it!

Allthewaves Tue 26-Sep-17 10:41:48

Can mum not help with childcare so you can at least work some hours and get foot in the door so to speak

QueenNefertitty Tue 26-Sep-17 10:45:40

@waves

She's doing some, and I pay her for a days childcare for DS a week as it is- but she also works so can't cover me for more than an extra morning or so (all the last min leave she can manage to get from her boss)

It's just a single parent thing, isn't it. Suppose I have to get used to
It... it's just the timing is so so so bad for a "reality check"

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