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AIBU?

To think friend should have complimented photo?

204 replies

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:43

Friend came round yesterday, I'd been to a social family event just over a week ago and first time I'd seen her since. (She knew I'd been stressing about outfits and looking nice etc)So I got some pics up on I pad to show her.
Anyway the pics I showed her mainly featured me Smileas they were what people had txt me, facebooked etc, and not meaning to blow my own trumpet I looked nice in those pics I actually normally hate myself in pics. But I'd made a big effort for this event lost a few pounds to fit in a smaller dress, had my hair done, spent time on makeup etc.

Anyway I showed her the photos and she just went mmmm! No comment on any photo at all. As a friend who knew I'd been stressing about looking Nice for the photos I though she would at least say "oh you look lovely" but nothing.
Anyway I show her a couple more that the actual photographer had taken and I hated myself In...I said( "oh I look awful/weird or something along those lines) in these" she replied "yeah we all have those photos like that" not "don't be daft you look fine" which is what I would have said,

Anyway no major drama and I wasn't looking for compliments as such but I just found it strange. Aibu for thinking she can't bear to see me looking nice?😉

OP posts:
LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:44

"Special" not social

OP posts:
Ribrabrob · 25/09/2017 21:47

Hmm tough one. I think you'll have s lot of people say you are bu, however I can see your point and would be s littke hurt myself too.

Ribrabrob · 25/09/2017 21:47

Oops bad typos!

Mrsmadevans · 25/09/2017 21:47

Lola are you sure you haven't just driven her nuts over the special social event in the preceeding weeks and she really couldn't give a damn about the pics?

pictish · 25/09/2017 21:48

Um...without meaning to be rude...perhaps she'd heard enough chat about your appearance?

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:48

Oh god no! She's been here an hour before I thought to show her as kids had I pad.

OP posts:
LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:49

Haha far from it m, I don't constantly chat about how I look I'd mentioned to her that I wanted to look good for the pics as they will be around forever.

OP posts:
Snap8TheCat · 25/09/2017 21:49

I hate it when people fish for compliments. Makes me say nothing rather than the nice thing I might be thinking.

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 25/09/2017 21:50

Sounds like she's fed up of you obsessing over your appearance for the photos of one event.

MistressPage · 25/09/2017 21:50

You do seem really overly focussed on your appearance. Maybe you should do a bit more work on your personality.

G1raffe · 25/09/2017 21:50

I sometimes struggle.if people don't mean what they say. If you were saying "look st me in these pictures don't I look awful" I don't think I'd know what to say either!! Id not want to argue with you or agree you look awful !!

I don't think ive ever had someone show me multiple pictures of themselves to comment on...

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 25/09/2017 21:51

Well seeing as you can toot your own horn loud enough. Why do you need other people to toot it for you.

G1raffe · 25/09/2017 21:51

And yes surely youd chat avout the event ot avoht what you looked like? Sounds really odd behaviour to me.

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:52

I wasn't fishing,literally just showed her the pics obviously I was in them as they were what I'd been sent it was just the no reaction I was pissed off about.

OP posts:
Fruitboxjury · 25/09/2017 21:53

Sounds like she was either bored or jealous but I don't have enough info on either of you to say which.

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:54

Yes maybe I am paranoid about my appearance but so are alot of people but trust me I don't go on about it, she's not my best friend see her alot but literally mentioned it once.

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 25/09/2017 21:54

She was probably just not interested in seeing pictures of someone else's night out.

G1raffe · 25/09/2017 21:55

I wouldn't mention someone's appearance tbh. It really sounds like this is an issue for you (in the most kindest possible way. I'm stuck with a billion issues so not meant as a criticism!)

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 25/09/2017 21:55

So, pretty much, in her eyes, you were saying 'oh look at me' and 'don't I look lovely here' and 'aww I really like this photo of me' and 'don't you think I'm beautiful' followed by 'oh, it's awful how awful human I look here, please tell me that I'm actually stunning and look nothing like me'...

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:55

Fruit-she had just voted me for an hour talking about her daughter at uni I had the good grace to engage though.

OP posts:
LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 25/09/2017 21:56

Bored not voted.

OP posts:
G1raffe · 25/09/2017 21:56

I don't think it is usual to expect a reaction over appearance in a photo of an event is it? Especially if you've already said you don't like the photos (but actual mean thou do!?)

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Summerswallow · 25/09/2017 21:57

I think she was mean. If someone shows me photos or posts stuff on Facebook of themselves, especially if I know they would be nervous about how it would be perceived, I'd look at the photos and find something nice to say about them- or just appreciate them as the lovely photos I'm sure they were. Not everyone is looking to put others down. It is rude to look at photos and say nothing, it just is.

GreenTulips · 25/09/2017 21:57

Maybe she'd rather seen the event photos than you in all of them? So much obsession these days with pics - very sad

TwitterQueen1 · 25/09/2017 21:57

So your'e cross because you weren't told how beautiful, fantastic, marvellous, slim you looked?

You were clearly inviting one of those awful conversations where you say something like "Oh I'm not sure this is the best one..." and the friend is supposed to say "No! You look absolutely gorgeous, have you lost weight, blah blah blah." and the you say "but I'm not sure this is flattering..." and the friend is supposed to say "Oh but it's lovely..." and so on and so on.

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