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My dd WWUD?

(4 Posts)
Iamthedogsmother Mon 25-Sep-17 11:45:12

My dd is 9. She was very confident when she was little but she's been bullied twice since she's been in school. The first time, I moved her to a different school and the second, just last term and was particularly nasty, the 'bully' left. So dd is quite shy and has low self esteem. I'm doing all I can think of to help her - martial arts, youth club, time just me and her, etc.

She goes to a very small school in a rural area, just 9 in her year. She hasn't really got any friends at school. There is another child who is quite unkind to my dd. This isn't my dd's imagination, I've heard this girl and I've put her in her place. She's very critical of my dd, dd can do nothing right. Other parents have approached me to tell me this and that their child has told them about this girl's unkind behaviour towards my dd. I've told the school and the girl's mother. The other mother agrees it's a problem but nothing has changed. I've told school that I'm encouraging my dd to assert herself and I expect the staff to back her up. For what it's worth, it's possible this girl may have some SN. I understand this and I'm sympathetic as I have DS with high functioning ASD who's 14. But I'm worried about my dd and how to help her.

Is there anything else you can think of? I have no support network and my own mum died some years ago. So I'm turning to the wisdom of mumsnet.

Nanny0gg Mon 25-Sep-17 11:52:33

What have the school said that they're going to do about it?

KimmySchmidt1 Mon 25-Sep-17 12:13:18

what have you said to your own DD about it all? An amazing number of people worry and ask for advice on here without transferring any information or communication to their own children. Talk to her about how to stand up to people, how some people are crap and have crap lives and are jealous of her and she just needs to wait a bit and they will disappear from her life and end up failures anyway, talk to her about why she is great and should feel confident, give her lots of confidence boosting compliments.

Don't just try to create other things in her life that help (like hobbies) and be the impact yoursel by communicating with her.

Iamthedogsmother Mon 25-Sep-17 12:38:44

Thanks for your replies. School have agreed to back her up but that's about it. I've talked to dd extensively about it, how she's lovely and how proud I am of her. We talked about how this girl might have somebody other issues etc. Ive told her not to be rude but she must stand up for herself.

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