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To not bother with friend who is attached to her bf?

(18 Posts)
saggymaggyx Mon 25-Sep-17 00:15:04

Been friends for two years we met at work and hit it if from there.
She was there with me through everything my birthing partner ect.

Recently I'm just fed up to be honest we went to a festival last month. We followed her boyfriend round all day and night we couldn't go of incase we lost him.

Then at the end of the night she walked of into town and left me behind with her boyfriend and his friends because she thought he was talking to another girl.

I go to her house we have to sit in her room with her and her boyfriends friends. I honestly just can't stand it anymore I leave my ds for a night I expect to have a good night out not play follow the leader.

She spent £1500 on him for his birthday in gifts and booked an apartment for all his friends and didn't even bother asking me to come.

Won't reply to text messages or if she does it takes hours but can quite happily upload Instagram photos of her boyfriend and how "unreal he is"

There's so many other things that irritate me I don't bother texting her anymore just wait for her to text me.

She will never ask to meet up for food or do anything together and if she does she will leave early to pick her bf up blardy blah 🙄

Clearoutre Mon 25-Sep-17 07:05:54

Their relationship isn't particularly balanced if she's following him around and walking off etc. Agree you should take a step back before you lose all sight of her good points and/or have a fall out.

Maroonie Mon 25-Sep-17 07:19:06

If she's been a good mate in the past try and distance yourself but don't actually fall out.
It doesn't sound like a good relationship and if she wants to leave but has no friends to lean on she will find it harder to get out.
I've been on both sides of it and it's shit

Only1scoop Mon 25-Sep-17 07:25:19

'She spent £1500 on him for his birthday in gifts and booked an apartment for all his friends and didn't even bother asking me to come.'

Why would you want to anyway?

Tell her you miss the old her in a kind way and distance yourself a little at the same time.

Rheged Mon 25-Sep-17 07:28:52

Why would you want to go and stay in an apartment with him and his friends when you can’t stand them and dislike him.

Nikephorus Mon 25-Sep-17 07:53:19

She spent £1500 on him for his birthday in gifts and booked an apartment for all his friends and didn't even bother asking me to come
It was his birthday & his friends so why would you expect an invite?!

Only1scoop Mon 25-Sep-17 08:04:28

TBH it's a pretty fast moving relationship

Work friend of only two years now BF and been your birthing partnerconfused

Maybe slow down a little?

saggymaggyx Mon 25-Sep-17 08:05:25

No because she went to the party and then she moaned when she was there for four days that no one is talking to her.

She asked me before if I would come before booking it then when the time came didn't here anything again.

They financed a car together well he did for 20 grand and she pays half. It just makes me cringe because she's paying of his finance really. She said to me the night we went out if we split up I couldn't afford another car "not that it would ever happen"

I just don't think it's normal to jump through hoops for someone so much. Or is this normal and I'm just a moany bint?

I agree about taking a few steps back to be honest may have to start making some new friends.

Only1scoop Mon 25-Sep-17 08:10:16

She sounds like his cling on

Bet his mates eye roll as she accompanies them everywhere

Very childlike I'm assuming she's under 22?

Wheresmytaco Mon 25-Sep-17 08:12:58

What's wrong with asking your best friend if two years to be your birth partner?confused

Mulch Mon 25-Sep-17 08:14:57

No sense of sisterhood
I've got mate that's similar, when she's single she has time, when shes in a relationship she's no where to be seen. I don't take it personally I see it as a character flaw. She hates being alone and will cling on to any guy that shows her abit of attention.

saggymaggyx Mon 25-Sep-17 08:15:29

@Only1scoop yup it's very frustrating I'm a bit older than her so I find the things she does annoying.

Why would I want to sit in her room with her boyfriend and his mates while there on his Xbox. Does it not cross her mind that it's a weird situation to be in?

I moved closer to her she's been to my house once. In two months!

pasturesgreen Mon 25-Sep-17 08:21:28

She sounds unbearable. I cannot stand how some women lose all sense of perspective when they start a new relationship. I'd distance myself.

LazyDailyMailJournos Mon 25-Sep-17 08:30:45

Like Mulch says, she sounds like one of these people who only remembers her mates when she's single.

She also sounds deeply insecure. It's not normal to follow people round and it's not normal to cling to them to the extent that you have no separate life. I'd also be very worried about her paying half the finance on her BF's car - because that has disaster written all over it if they split up. I hope for her sake that her name is not on the agreement and that she's not done anything daft like being a guarantor for the loan.

RebeccaWrongDaily Mon 25-Sep-17 08:40:32

to be fair you both sound very young. Someone you only met 2 years ago at work and she's been your birth partner and you know intimate details of her bank account etc.?

Step back. How old is your baby?Maybe she thought you wouldn't be able to get anyone to have the baby for the weekend away?

saggymaggyx Mon 25-Sep-17 08:51:02

I don't think it matters how long you've known someone though she was a really good friend to me. Nothing was ever forced was just completely natural.

I don't know details of her bank account she just told me how much she's spent all together and how ungrateful he was.

RonSwansonsMoustache Mon 25-Sep-17 09:01:40

How old is she? She sounds very young.

I can't think of anything worse than sitting in a room watching a bunch of boys play Xbox but I definitely remember doing it ten years ago as a teenager! She sounds young and a bit insecure but I think that's pretty normal for someone of her age.

Why not accept you're not really great friends? She wants to hang out with her boyfriend, but that's not for you, which is fair enough. Either see her on her own (you could do something straight from work or invite her to yours) or just stop trying to be best mates with her. I'm sure she's a nice girl, but that doesn't mean she's a good friend.

alohaimnew Mon 25-Sep-17 09:02:30

Is this a new relationship for her after a while?

My sister was like this at the start of her relationsip - she dropped everyone to be by his side when she could. Theyve been together 4 years now and its become more normal and she's reverted back to how she used to be.

I would sit her down and talk to her if i were you, although if shes stubborn like my sister, she wont listen to you and will continue to think he is a God for a while... give it a few years wink

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