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AIBU?

To be upset I may have to stop breastfeeding?

29 replies

segc94 · 22/09/2017 20:18

I’m going back to work in a couple of months, and my line of work means I won’t be able to breast feed as I get very few breaks to express.
I’m guessing that I’ll stop producing milk, or produce considerably less and not enough for my baby.
I don’t mind formula feeding, my baby is on one formula feed at night the rest is breast feeding.. but for some reason I feel extremely guilty and upset about not being able to breast feed anymore. Is this normal?
My baby will be approximately 4.5 months old when I go back to work.

OP posts:

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Redken24 · 22/09/2017 20:19

Do your employers not have to give you time to express?

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Winteriscomingneedmorewood · 22/09/2017 20:20

Depends when your hours of work are.
I watched a documentary about a dm who worked away Monday - Friday and bf at the week ends only!

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outofmydepth45 · 22/09/2017 20:21

Just express when you can and combination feed ?

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mumofone234 · 22/09/2017 20:21

I feel your pain - I'm dreading going back, and partly for this reason (although my baby will be a bit older so you've got it rougher). I know people who've said that they kept breastfeeding only in the morning and evening for months when their babies were older, so maybe the body regulates and keeps producing just for one or two feeds a day? That way you could at least combi feed. That's what I'm hoping to do.

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Lenl · 22/09/2017 20:23

My first was older when I went back (about 10 months) and it was only part time, but he had formula on the 3 days a week I worked. However I found my supply adjusted. On work days (I was gone 7.45am - 6pm) I fed him in the morning, then when I got home and before bed. On my days off I sometimes fed more but not always. So it may be that you can still for example feed at tea time or in the mornings. Your baby will just be combi fed. If you don't want to stop then I think as long as you keep feeding when you can there's no reason supply will completely dry up. We fed til 18m that way.

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LuchiMangsho · 22/09/2017 20:24

Your supply adjusts. I fed in the morning. At night (at bedtime) and 1-2 times at night. My supply was fine and I did not express a drop.

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Oldie2017 · 22/09/2017 20:24

There may be a legal right to give you b reaks to express. I expressed work (office work) in the loo and no one knew. Also even if you don't you can do what I did - breastfeed as soon as you wake, again the second before you leave for work, as soon as you walk in the door and every few hours at night and at the weekend and on holidays. I certainly did that. I never fed a baby from a bottle ever.

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LuchiMangsho · 22/09/2017 20:25

And yes I fed a lot over the weekend.

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PeabodyTheGreat · 22/09/2017 20:25

I have just been feeding in the morning and the evening (formula in day) and milk doesn't show any sign of stopping- I've found I really like this time now, it's more "special" than it was!

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Lenl · 22/09/2017 20:25

I was also talking to a woman at toddler group who was still breastfeeding her 14m old (and has been the last 3 months) while working 4 days a week. It's definitely possible to continue.

If you don't breastfeed when you are at home then your supply will stop because your body won't be getting signalled to keep producing.

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mineofuselessinformation · 22/09/2017 20:26

I don't know about the right to express where you work - but I do know that I returned to work and fed in the morning and at bedtime for several months after. All is not lost.

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FlandersRocks · 22/09/2017 20:26

I'll be going back to work when ds3 is 7 months and been feeling the same op. He's also on one formula feed a day, in the evening, and otherwise bf.

I will be allowed the time at work but I struggle to express at all...I've never got more than 10ml out and have tried hand/manual and electric pumps so I know he'll have to have some more formula in the day.

I'm planning on keeping what feeds we can though even if only the morning and evening feeds...any you can stick with is better than none. Anyway, I have no solution but know how you feel!

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KarateKitten · 22/09/2017 20:26

Oh fuck had a long ans for you and bastard phone wiped it.

Basically I go back to work st 6 weeks and combination feed. You can keep your 7pm, 11pm, overnight and 7am feeds for as long as you want. Just wipe out your day feeds to formula one at a time to avoid engorgement or damage to supply. Your body relearned when you need supply and you won't even feel unconfortable or leaky 7am to 7pm.

You can combi feed as long as you like.

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CheerfulMuddler · 22/09/2017 20:27

I currently only give DS one feed in the mornings. There's still milk. Before that he had one feed in the morning and one feed at night when he got home from the childminder. Still milk. You may have to combination feed more than you'd like, but you won't have to give up entirely unless you want to.

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Sassypants82 · 22/09/2017 20:27

I'm not in the UK, but know that here, employers must give you time to express during your shift if the baby is under six months old. Think it's 60mins per shift /work day broken up into however you need to take it. You should check out your rights.

Otherwise, you can still feed morning & evening if you want, your supply will adjust.

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KarateKitten · 22/09/2017 20:28

Ah, cross posted with loads of people.

One thing I'd say is fuck expressing. It's miserable and a faff and unless you want all bottles to be breastmilk it's pointless. Your body will happily make only the feeds you need.

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trebleclef101 · 22/09/2017 20:29

YADNBU. When I returned to work I expressed for about 2 months, but it didn't really work for us so we switched to formula. It was the right decision, but I felt really sad and a bit guilty that I was no longer feeding her.

Just remember whatever happens, you have already breastfed for 4.5 months and that is an amazing thing

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TheMasterNotMargarita · 22/09/2017 20:31

You can still bf.
I went back when ds was 8 months. He's now almost 13 months and we're still going strong. Tbh I was ready to stop a feww weeks ago as I was very tired but I've rallied!
It took a couple of weeks for supply to adjust but I give formula during the day at weekends now too so I don't end up sore after feeding all weekend then not on a Monday iyswim.
We will swap to cow's milk soon for daytime but will try and continue bf for as long as we both are happy.

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Beamur · 22/09/2017 20:33

I went back to work when DD 9 months old, ebf but starting solids. Could not get to grips with expressing. I worked 4 days a week. I found I could bf in the morning, after I collected DD from nursery/got home from work, sometimes at night, weekends etc and it was absolutely fine. It was a lovely way to reconnect with her when I'd been away all day. Mildly uncomfortable boobs for less than a week whilst adjusting to new routine. Carried on like this for another year or so. Hope you can carry on if you want to.

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Crunchymum · 22/09/2017 20:40

My DD was a bit older when I went back (12m) but my supply also adjusted. I'd feed morning, as soon as I got in, before bed [and overnight once or twice].

Continued like this until DD was 2y8m. Overnight feeds were dropped she she was about 2.

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segc94 · 22/09/2017 20:40

Thanks for the comments I’m feeling a bit better about this! Hopefully my supply will just adjust and not dry up.
I’m self employed and with the job I do I work back to back and have about a 5min break in between jobs.. so I wouldn’t get chance to express during the day. But hearing mums can breastfeed morning and in the evenings have made me feel more confident.

OP posts:

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lozengeoflove · 22/09/2017 20:45

Hi OP. I understand your worry. I've been there myself. My experience was that the supply will adjust. I went back to work when both of my DCs were 8 months old. Each time I wasn't able to express at work, and was away from them for around 9 hours whilst working.
I ended up breastfeeding DC1 til 13 months and DC2 til 16 months.

Good luck and try not to worry. The body is a a clever old thing!

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LouHotel · 22/09/2017 21:05

You can definitely breastfeed morning and evening and nightime your supply will adapt.

You will have to supplement a couple of feeds of formula for a 4.5 month old but you can gradually cut those feeds down until roughly 10 months when baby will be fine with just morning and evening.

Any breastfeeding is an achievement. :)

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LouHotel · 22/09/2017 21:06

Just to add i couldnt breastfeed in work - so in the morning i feed off one side express the other and then the same when i get home. So you could express 1 or 2 feeds for the day.

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Flopjustwantscoffee · 22/09/2017 21:28

Flanders, if it helps I found it very hard to express before going back to work as I was fitting it in around feeding my baby so he was taking it all first. When I was away from the baby ( :( ) I had heaps and it would be actually quite uncomfortable until I went to express.
And set, .i went back to work when mine was 4 months (although I was able to express it was a huge pressure so I'm not sure in retrospect it was the right decision). Do you think you will be able to ease in with a couple of half days? Just to give your body a chance to adjust if you are used to breastfeeding during the day. Otherwise bring lots of breastpads and maybe a spare shirt for the first few days (bitter experience)