As a child I craved mother figures, as my mother was physically and emotionally abusive, and is so damaged herself that she really cannot parent or offer any unconditional love. Despite this I have had a good life, thanks to a lovely Dad, but also to two teachers who I thought the world of, and who I used to wish were my mother. One died eleven years ago. Not a day has gone by without me thinking of her. The other is someone I contact maybe at Christmas, but quite rarely. I was so aware of being needy and attention seeking as a child that I left her alone when I left school, though did write to say the reason I'd taken her subject at university was because of her. I have now written a book and am going to dedicate it to her as a thank you. She knows I thought she was a brilliant teacher. Should I leave it at that? Part of me wants her to know that I wished she'd been my mother and that the fact I've come out of my childhood ok (unlike my sister) is to a great extent because of her steady kindness. Or is that too much and liable to embarrass us both? The mother figure stuff would be a private message, not part of the dedication. i do realise that that would be too much!
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