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AIBU?

To ask DP to hover sometimes?

33 replies

GingerNutMarmite · 19/09/2017 15:08

Asking as we've just had yet another silly argument about hoovering!

Every single time I ask DP to hoover it very quickly descends into a barrage of excuses as to why he shouldn't do it.

Then it often turns into a full blown row where afterwards he sulks for hours.

I ask him about once a month. I hoover every week or two, so not that often.

Anyway, he's out sulking in the garden whilst I have a very large glass of wine Wine

The hoover has been abandoned in the front room..

OP posts:
DoesAnyoneReadTheseThings · 19/09/2017 15:09

What are his excuses for why he shouldn't do it?

MrsTerryPratchett · 19/09/2017 15:10

I can't resist: Is he a hummingbird? Grin

If you mean Hoover... does he generally pull his weight housework-wise? Is it just the Hoover or is he under the impression that a penis precludes him from shitwork?

tigercub50 · 19/09/2017 15:12

Perhaps he could " hover" when you throw him out of the window lol (sorry couldn't resist). Does he do anything else around the house?

NannyR · 19/09/2017 15:12

Why do you need to ask him to do it? Shouldn't he just notice that it going and get on with it, the same way that you do.

Tinty · 19/09/2017 15:12

For the sake of marital harmony is there another job he could do instead? Or is it just he thinks all housework is beneath him? I don't mind hoovering so my partner irons (I hate ironing).

Or did you really want him to float in the air and he is just sulking in the garden rather than showing you his awesome hovering powers. Grin.

NannyR · 19/09/2017 15:13

"It needs doing" not going!!

BackieJerkhart · 19/09/2017 15:15

I have I look forward to hearing his excuses!

Blossomdeary · 19/09/2017 15:15

Get a Roomba and sit back and watch it go!

QuimReaper · 19/09/2017 15:39
Grin
SilverySurfer · 19/09/2017 15:42

Honestly bloody men can be so unreasonable sometimes. What possible excuse can he have for not levitating Grin

Sorry OP Smile seriously, of course he should do his share of housework. Give up doing his washing, cooking his food, see if he feels like hoovering then.

GingerNutMarmite · 19/09/2017 15:45

Sorry about the bad spelling... I was furiously typing!!

He's always been pretty bad at doing housework. Although I know it's my fault for letting it happen.

In our house he does the washing up and I do the laundry. The rest is 'shared', as in I do it Hmm

His excuse is normally "I pay more bills so should do less housework".

Basically he owns the house that we've been living in together for 5 years now. I moved in just after he bought the house. I pay a fair chunk towards the mortgage but he does pay more for he bills etc.

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 19/09/2017 15:49

Get a cleaner

TurnipCake · 19/09/2017 15:49

His excuse is normally "I pay more bills so should do less housework".

Fuck that.

As Caitlin Moran says in caps, "WOMEN DID NOT INVENT DUST"

My OH earns more than me, he pulls his weight in our flat.

GingerNutMarmite · 19/09/2017 15:51

I've been eyeing up those Roombas for months now. Maybe that's the solution!

Pritchett- I've think you've hit the nail on the head there Grin His mother did everything for him and his dad. I don't think she did him or me any favours.

Nanny- He just doesn't seem to have the initiative. He's 34, I'd love for him to take the responsibility naturally! I hate asking.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 19/09/2017 15:56

You're paying towards the mortgage? Do you own part of the house now?

lynmilne65 · 19/09/2017 15:57

In my experience few of the little darlings ever notices things needing done
My youngest would look around the skip he lives in and sa Whaaaat ! Sorry should be eldest '!!!

TurnipCake · 19/09/2017 15:59

He does have initiative - do his bosses have to remind him of all his tasks he has to do at work?

He's one of a long line of men who expect women to be their skivvies in the household

JapaneseTea · 19/09/2017 15:59

Is the house in joint names? If not then get it so asap.

A lazy arse will always be a lazy arse. Get a cleaner, a roomba and rota but if he doesn't think your time is as important as his then you are signing up for a miserable life.

PressForPancakes · 19/09/2017 16:02

DH and I have a row about this every few months or so. I've just had to learn to accept that he doesn't 'see' mess and dirt the way I do. I don't think he means anything by it.

Still makes me Angry though...

FallingOrbit · 19/09/2017 16:08

Hoovering seems to be a bit of a thing on here today!
I HATE hoovering, I would rather do ANY other household task than hoover. But, I live on my own so I have to do it anyway. If a DP were to move in I would be delighted to do absolutely EVERYTHING else if she agreed to do the hoovering!

You should trade-off. If he hates hoovering but is willing to do other exciting household chores like cleaning the oven (shit job) the bathroom, the windows etc etc then you could probably compromise.

But if he won't then that's unfair and you should tell him to either step up and pull his weight or live in the garden.

wasonthelist · 19/09/2017 16:30

Off Topic. How the hell did it get called Hoovering?

We don't call doing the washing Hotpointing, or going out in the car Toyotaring.

RaeCJ82 · 19/09/2017 16:30

Please don't contribute to someone's mortgage if you aren't named on the deeds. I did this and when the relationship broke down I was left with nothing!

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ladystarkers · 19/09/2017 16:37

Depends. Rarley ask Dh to hoover as he does 12 hour days. At the weekend he cooks, does laundry, childcare etc

SilverySurfer · 19/09/2017 17:15

RaeCJ82
Please don't contribute to someone's mortgage if you aren't named on the deeds. I did this and when the relationship broke down I was left with nothing!

This with bells on, if you split and you're not married, you leave with nothing. I would either insist on being put on deeds or rent your own place.

balsamicbarbara · 19/09/2017 17:58

There is a quid pro quo here. You pay less towards the bills and he does less housework. You could split it all evenly if you preferred.

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