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Looking after 3yr old grandchild for half of OUR week off!!

(89 Posts)
motormummy Tue 22-Aug-17 18:38:16

AIBU... partner and I both work full time and rarely get time off together, let alone a whole week as I have two jobs. I have two teenage boys. We were going to book a last min hol of some sort to get some time away next week.
Partner comes home tonight and announces we are looking after grandchild next week on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday while her mum starts her new job. We've already had her for quite a few sessions recently while mum works or does chores where having a small child about would 'take so much longer'. I can sympathise with that so no problem. BUT Mum has known about having to start new job for weeks, surely she had realised she would have problems with holiday childcare. She has sister, mother, aunties, the child's father and his parents to call on for help. I'm guessing they've all got fed up or turned her down. I'm pretty sure she could go to her dads, tbh.
AIBU to feel massively resentful over this imposition? I wouldn't mind if it was just one day but 3???
And what's going to happen in future school hols. ? I kind of think DP agreed cos if he'd said no there would be a massive strop and probably wouldn't see them agin for months. Don't get me wrong , she's a lovely child and I enjoy having her around, it's just because it's my week off.

abigamarone Tue 22-Aug-17 18:40:02

Who's grandchild is she?

wonderingsoul Tue 22-Aug-17 18:40:48

Id get your dp on the phone right away saying so sorry but youv booked a screact week away so will have to cancell having her

QuiteLikely5 Tue 22-Aug-17 18:41:18

Sometimes life is just damn unfair! I'd be gutted if I was missing out on a last minute holiday too!

RedHelenB Tue 22-Aug-17 18:43:37

You and sons go away and let so look after his grandkid.

Ameliablue Tue 22-Aug-17 18:45:59

Sounds like it's your dp you should be annoyed with as he should have told her you had plans to go away.

Aquamarine1029 Tue 22-Aug-17 18:46:19

Have you expressed your feelings to your partner? He does NOT have the right to volunteer your babysitting services without your consent, and I don't care if it's a grandchild or not. This child is her parent's responsibility, not yours.

Leeds2 Tue 22-Aug-17 18:47:06

Go away with your sons, as you were planning to do. Shame to miss out on a holiday due to having to babysit.

MissBabbs Tue 22-Aug-17 18:48:59

Either partner tells her no or he does the 3 days childcare single handed ( you are enjoying your rare break elsewhere) -- he won't do it again.

StillDrivingMeBonkers Tue 22-Aug-17 18:50:07

I assume it isn't your grandchild?

SaturnUranus Tue 22-Aug-17 18:51:38

Go away with your teenagers as planned.

Your DP can join you when he's finished the childcare duties that he volunteered for.

NicolasFlamel Tue 22-Aug-17 18:54:34

I'm confused about whose grandchild she is..
Anyway it's your partner you should be annoyed with. He should have said you had plans.

EggysMom Tue 22-Aug-17 18:54:37

Either go away with the teenagers, and DP can join you part way through the week, or

Cancel your annual leave for those days, and go in to work, leaving DP to care for his GD on his own. Then be off for the second half of the week with DP and teenagers, and go away just for a few days. (You could perhaps take the other days later in the year and have a spa-break on your own!)

grandOlejukeofYork Tue 22-Aug-17 18:54:47

Partner comes home tonight and announces we are looking after grandchild next week on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday while her mum starts her new job

And why did you not reply that "WE" are doing no such thing, since nobody asked me and we already have plans?

JaneEyre70 Tue 22-Aug-17 19:10:50

I'd leave DP to it, he agreed not you and book a holiday for you and your sons. He won't volunteer again without asking you, hopefully.

Winterview Tue 22-Aug-17 19:13:40

Put your foot down! It's not convenient. Your partner should have asked you before agreeing! If he insists, go on holiday with your sons, without him.

MissionItsPossible Tue 22-Aug-17 19:14:25

I would be pretty pissed off to be honest. And I'd still book the holiday.

Purplepicnic Tue 22-Aug-17 19:14:55

Did he know you were planning on going away?

Lemonnaise Tue 22-Aug-17 19:17:49

Nip this in the bud now otherwise you'll be doing it all the time. As you say, one day is fine but she's taking the piss. I know a man who wouldn't say no to his daughter(everyone else told her to eff off) and he now has his grandkids 5 days out of 7..every week, does all the school runs and has them almost full-time in the school holidays while mum and dad work.

AlmostAJillSandwich Tue 22-Aug-17 19:19:13

Its not just about wanting time off, its wanting it TOGETHER.
Yes op could go away with teens but she wanted time off with her partner as its rare to get it together. Dps dd has taken advantage and dp probably felt he couldnt say no, but should have. Id try to get him to tell her hes sorry but he cant take dgd as he didnt realise plans had been made.

ClemDanfango Tue 22-Aug-17 19:24:26

Just say no OP it's not on for your DP to just decide that you're babysitting.

DeadGood Tue 22-Aug-17 19:28:42

Who exactly are you annoyed at, OP? Because people are allowed to ask for help. Your husband was not obliged to say yes. But he did anyway.

Miserylovescompany2 Tue 22-Aug-17 19:35:52

Your husband is the one that you should direct your anger/frustration at - not the person who asked for childcare.

Motoko Tue 22-Aug-17 19:40:48

Either he cancels, or you go away with the teens and he joins you on Thursday.

magoria Tue 22-Aug-17 19:43:54

Don't waste your week off.

Go away as planned and leave him to do the childcare he agreed to.

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